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  1. #1
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    Default BFP stories from women who left work or reduced their hours?

    Hi ladies

    I'm in a relatively new job and have only been there a few months. We are just heading into a really big load of work that won't ease up for several months! Just what one wants when doing IVF.

    I am personally a tense, 100 miles an hour person - so i have to be organised. But no matter how much i plan i can't see how i can compete with the workload and this IVF journey. My hours are going to sky rocket an extra 10-20hrs a week on top of my fulltime job...the last 4 women who done this job also left! So high turnover. (wish they told me this in the interview)

    Fact is we need the $$$ to keep on this journey, live, save for baby etc but my partner and I are not keen to make a donation to the IVF man and put my health at risk either. So the work has to go....all good in theory huh!

    So ladies - i need some motivation to deal with this - perhaps tips for discussion about my concerns to my employer? What you did with your work situation? If you left work or reduced hours do you think it contributed to a BFP?

    I'm currently in my first cycle and begin "jabbing" this Friday - very excited!

  2. #2
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    Hi Meshell

    thanks for the response. You have a really good point about being at work rather than home and i think you are right! I spent 3 weeks out of work and it did do my head in lol so i can't imagine what longer periods would do to me.

    I had a conversation with my supervisor today and the right opportunity arose to bring up my work load concerns, turns out shes more than happy to help out and delegate the tasks for me (another good to know but wait and see how smoothly that goes) But i will take it as a positive!

    Fingers crossed me being busy speeds up the process between waiting for a BPF one day! Congrats on your BFP

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    Default BFP stories from women who left work or reduced their hours?

    When I went through my ivf journey I took 6 weeks off work because I worked away from home at a remote work site and I was lucky that I did take the time off because I had some complications involved. I then got my bfp and found that the workload was too much for me working nightshift 96 hrs in 8 days cooking for 750 ppl each day on my own so I left very soon after.
    Do what's right for you and goodluck on your journey

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    chances  (06-09-2012)

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    It really depends on how long you are on the IVF journey for which none of us even know!

    I've done 4 cycles now and am giving up work next year if we continue. I've had 3 chemical pregnancies and i get really bad side effects from the drugs, so i think over the course of a year, it's left me so exhausted that i can't focus on work anymore. Im also finding it harder and harder to fit in all my appointments.

    BUT you could have an easy cycle, and get preggers first go. IVF can be so unpredictable. I just found that i've constantly got a headache or feel sick, or am grieving over lost babies and over time, that doesn't go well with full time work. We decided too, that because I'm getting so exhausted trying to keep up with work and that we'd already sunk 15k into ivf, that it was a good move for me to have a break and a rest for the next cycle.

    I really hope you are one of the lucky ones who gets your BFP first go Maybe just take it all one day at a time and see what happens. You may well be able to manage work with it for awhile. It's def good to have a distraction. This journey can be so unpredictable. Don't put too much pressure on yourself to do it all, lying down after a long day at work while you're on stims is more important than cleaning the house. You need to look after yourself

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    chances  (06-09-2012)

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    have to agree with the PP...it really depends on how long and how well it goes...i didnt drop hours til i got til about cycle 3...it was going badly as well ie not responding well to the drugs, no xfers etc....everyone copes differently. it was more the stress of getting to appts (and lying at work about it) and the psychological effects of the drugs and failures that made me decide to go part time...personally it made no difference to my case i beleive at all and cost me thousands but hey, it was the right drugs that got me over the line....i think working 96+??hrs and the fact the everyone who has done the job so far has left !!!! would say to me its too hard without ivf let alone with it ..personally i would be looking for another job as that amount of work sounds ridiculous evidenced by the high turnover . i can also assure you that once pg you will be even more exhausted so mmmmmmmmmmmmm...............id be looking around.

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    Default BFP stories from women who left work or reduced their hours?

    You can't plan your life around IVF, you just have to fit it in as best you can.

    No point reducing hours, or letting management know your IVF plans before you have to. They might seem understanding but it can get very ugly very quickly. When my boss found out I was doing IVF he went around asking who was interested in covering me for maternity leave!!! I wasn't even pregnant yet and it was awful.

    I found IVF very easy, my body coped with the drugs well. I needed a few days off after egg pick up, but that could just have easily been needed if I caught the flu.

    If you've had repeated unexplained failures then a rest might help. But I agree with previous posters, better to keep busy at work!!

  9. #7
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    For me personally I think it is more about the quality of your employer rather than numbers of hours worked. If you have a manager that is open and flexible and will allow you to do the things you need to then I think you can continue working as normal. IVF mostly involves early morning appointments, 1 day off for collection, 1 day off for transfer. My first company were horrible and made life difficult and I became extremely stressed out. My second company is fantastic and doing IVF etc is not a problem. I did drop to part time though as I thought it would make things easier. I don't think full-time or part-time work makes a huge difference though on getting a BFP. Again, I think it's more whether you are in a supportive environment. It really reduces stress levels. Good luck!

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    Thanks Grace

    I think i'll take the wait and see approach and see how i do with the drugs etc. I used to get disappointed with BFN every month pre IVF so i imagine this is going to be hard.

    i have been just getting my exercise out of the way in the morn and have not signed up for anything that uses my extra time in or out of work. So most nights i can come hm and take it relatively easy.

    I had the headaches pre AF but now i'm fine - be interesting to see how i handle the "jabbing".

    Thanks JFbaldy - my boss reckons the last ladies only worked longer hrs in the later half so we shall see. I have one eye looking out for new work but i do like my job and am comfortable there i just need to ask for help more (something i'm not good at and i hear the last lady wasn't either) I also need to calm myself...i've started listening to my ipod and have some nice natural oils on hand to try and calm me lol.

    Thanks wise enough, isn't that terrible about your boss! OMG can't imagine how i would feel if my senior boss did that (he's male and i can imagine he would too lol) Mind you i'm contract so it would just be bye bye. I plan on keeping the ivf very under wraps and am trying to get to all my scans and including tomorrow morns appoint all before work. The EC and transfer I'll take as sick days and just ask for medical certs.
    I don't think its anyones business if you have medical certs and i'm planning on pre warning my supervisor, shes female and lovely, so she wont ask difficult questions or intrude. ..my snr boss i'm unsure of lol.

    Thanks summershine - have you had many cycles since you went PT? I would love PT but yeh your right it is about the work place too so who knows, I have it ok where i am but its just the crazy projects on the go at the moment.
    Last edited by chances; 06-09-2012 at 18:10.

  11. #9
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    Default BFP stories from women who left work or reduced their hours?

    I was fly in fly out from east to west coast, 70 hour weeks and 1 day off a month. I went from transfer to a plane back to WA and the alarm went off at 5am the next day. I got a BFP with that one and am of the belief that if it's gunna take its gunna take.

    It could be long journey so please don't plan you life around ivf or it gets depressing. Just take the odd mental health day if you need some time for you.

    Also second not telling your employer, it's none of their business and feeling unsupported in your journey is the worst thing ever

    Good luck.

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    chances  (06-09-2012)

  13. #10
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    Default BFP stories from women who left work or reduced their hours?

    Hi chances. This is exactly what I am doing when I cycle in November. I already have one beautiful dd from our first cycle in 2009 but have tried 2 full stims and an fet since then which have all ended in bfn. I work part time at the moment anyway due to having my dd but decided to take sick leave while I go through this next cycle. Provided my fs agrees and writes me the medical certificate. The cycles since having dd have been extremely stressful. I am finding it a lot harder to cope with a toddler, early morning appointments, part time work plus everything else we all need to do keeping a house running. My dh is a huge help but he can't take my place when I go in for scans at 5.40am in the city then come home finish getting dd ready then drive to work in the other direction. Those days are long and exhausting and dd is at a stage where she is testing the boundaries. Plus I have terrible side effects from the medication the last few times to the point where i haven't even known how to get dinner started. I am in such a daze. Last cycle I was speeding through a school zone and had no idea I was in such a daze and the cop that pulled me over questioned if I was ok to continue driving. I was so upset absolutely beside myself that I had been speeding and of course incurred a fine. So needless to say, dh is also happy I am taking time off for this next cycle. I think it will be about 3 weeks but the beauty of sick leave means I can extend it if needed. I will be telling my work that I have had some female related complications and will require surgery and recovery time. Essentially this is all true.

    I can't tell you how much I am looking forward to this next cycle. Dd will go to kindy on the days she normally does and I will spend my time relaxing, going for walks, resting or maybe doing some small cleaning jobs around the house in preparation for when we put it up for sale. I will concentrate on eating healthy and drinking lots of water. Such simple things that get over looked when you are constantly busy at work or dealing with a spirited toddler!


 

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