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  1. #31
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    Default WDYT about getting your partner involved in your battles...

    What annoys me even more than partners getting involved in work issues is when mothers do it. I have had mothers of 16-20 year olds turn up to interviews and want to come into the interview with them, ring to negotiate roster times, call in sick (when it's not for a reason the staff member couldn't have called themselves). Drives me insane! If your child is old enough o have a job then they are old enough to be responsible for their own interview/roster/sick days etc.
    On the partner issue I think we have to be culturally aware also that some woman are raised to have their husband 'take care of them' so the DH getting involved would not be uncommon in some cultures, especially if she has a male boss. this has happened to DH with his staff a few times over the years.

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  3. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jarylee View Post
    Im not referring to the original post, just the one I quoted

    I sincerely don't understand what she means by what she typed
    Yes sorry, I see what you mean, sorry about that.

  4. #33
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    I prefer to fight my own battles, and I'm sure DH is happy with things being this way.

    He is my behind the scenes support and will back me up and give me advice, but when it comes to the confrontation part, I'm going to handle the issues myself.

    I know a couple (now divorced) where the wife would constantly get her husband to fight ALL of her battles. But she has had mental health issues for a long time and to this day she is still incapable of standing up for herself. It's sad really.

  5. #34
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    Default Re: WDYT about getting your partner involved in your battles...

    Wow jez. I understand 16-17 mum coming into the interview to make sure their kid isnt being taken advantage of (but like sitting quietly in the corner not talking just listening. My dad applied for my first job for me and talked to the employer before he *let* them interview me, though Id just turned 15)

    But seriously? 20? I'm embarrassed for my generation some times!

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using BubHub

  6. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    It shows the woman has no balls and the man is a control freak.

    It's the same as when people get their spouses to call in sick for them at work: it looks pathetic and just raises questions about their intentions and the dynamics of the relationship.
    Seriously VicPark you must have the mightiest pair of balls around you refer a person's need to grow a pair so often!

    My DH rang my boss when my brother died. Does that make me pathetic? I know you were referring to sick days but honestly sometimes your posts are so sweeping it's really easy to punch holes in the logic behind them.

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  8. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boobycino View Post
    Wow jez. I understand 16-17 mum coming into the interview to make sure their kid isnt being taken advantage of (but like sitting quietly in the corner not talking just listening. My dad applied for my first job for me and talked to the employer before he *let* them interview me, though Id just turned 15)

    But seriously? 20? I'm embarrassed for my generation some times!

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using BubHub

    No, no, no. I can't believe you were hired honestly. When I was working, at every place I worked at, if a teenager came in to hand in their resume with a parent by their side (even if the parent was quiet and said nothing) resume went in the bin as soon as they walked out of the door. They didn't even get to interview stage....thought process was 'if you can't handle handing in a resume or going to an interview on your own you won't be able to handle the job.'

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  10. #37
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    I don't think partners should fight battles however.... If someone has been nasty or offensive to me socially I expect my DH to not be particularly nice to that person. Not mean, just support me by only being civil. If that makes me immature so be it!

    Ive also been guilty of getting DH to call in sick for me. My work will guilt me by saying "oh it's going to be so hard today, so n so has already called in sick!". So I'd rather not spend the day feeling both sick and guilty!

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    Default WDYT about getting your partner involved in your battles...

    Quote Originally Posted by Wastingtime View Post
    No, no, no. I can't believe you were hired honestly. When I was working, at every place I worked at, if a teenager came in to hand in their resume with a parent by their side (even if the parent was quiet and said nothing) resume went in the bin as soon as they walked out of the door. They didn't even get to interview stage....thought process was 'if you can't handle handing in a resume or going to an interview on your own you won't be able to handle the job.'
    My mum came in when I handed in my first resume. I was 14. I got the job. It was dental nursing. I don't see an issue tbh.

  12. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Atropos View Post
    My mum came in when I handed in my first resume. I was 14. I got the job. It was dental nursing. I don't see an issue tbh.
    Really? I have worked in a number of different places and it was frowned upon every time. My view has obviously been tainted by my work experiences but I will not be coming with my children to hand in resumes or attend job interviews with them. Obviously not all workplaces feel the same way about it though.

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  14. #40
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    As PP have said, I have no issues with DH getting involved IF it comes up. (E.g., if talking to a friend about a situation, and he voices his opinion). But I wouldn't want him to start calling people up/ wading in like that - and it's not something he would do. That sounds a bit odd.

    Regarding calling in sick, our work policy is such that people need to call in themselves (rather than leave messages/ email) and speak to a manager. The only time I would have got DH to do that for me is if I had some illness that meant I could not speak at all - which hasn't happened.

    Regarding parents coming to interviews... I don't see an issue with a parent being there when a CV is handed across in a casual 'drop in' situation. I would not allow a parent to be there in an interview without good cause (e.g., child needed an interpreter/ facilitator of some kind).


 
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