you sound really upset and for that i offer you some hugs.
However, you are contradicting yourself...you are angry that no one ever does anything for you...but then say you don't want to do anything with anyone.
I really think you need to let things have a fresh start and learn a lot about compromise. You are making it very very hard for her to be nice and setting yourself up for disappointment. You might find it is not what you are saying, but how you are saying it.
She is trying to be nice...if you want her to keep trying to be nice...you need to be gracious and reach a compromise!
That's where compromise comes into play. "I'm REALLY sorry but I have made plans, however I do still want to do something with you too, so how about we do coffee and cake at my/your house on xyz day/night"
I understand that you're giving the past the finger, but it seems like you're also giving her the finger too! And in giving the past the finger you might be giving the future one as well. Fair enough if that's what you want, but just pointing that out.
No off you go and enjoy yourself..
I don't think you're being 'petty' but I don't think you should blow her off completely either.
ExDPs family have never done anything for my birthday either.. I always plan something and invite them along; if they don't come I don't care though.
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Any suggestions I could suggest to her that doesn't involve cake, coffee or well....food?
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