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  1. #31
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    Default never felt so angry

    Quote Originally Posted by PuppyGuts View Post
    ok i dont take my frustrations out on her, yes i get upset but i dont hurt her and i am there if she genuinly needs comfort. But i also know my daughter better than anyone else and i KNOW that she is just crying out for attention, because she actually gets it from me at night.

    i know she is only 4 but some of the behavior is just delay tactics. I am going to work on it, we are on a mummy daughter date now at the pub (shes in the playroom) and i will be helping her with her pjs/reading some stories tonight to make her feel a bit more loved. But i wont be having her in my bed or just continuing to get up to her every couple hours. I need her to be able to sort this out for herself like i know she can.

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    Awww Hun it's so rough, I am hearing you! I think I commented earlyer on. It's great that you are on a date :-) hopefully she will sleep for you tonight!! I really hope that she starts sleeping through. I know your frustration! If you want to chat, pm me. I am probably going to get flamed too for saying this but you just get to a point where you know they are just bunging it on and if they continue you are worried that they will disturb someone! I really hope that things improve for you tonight and continue improving!

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  3. #32
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    DS1 and DS2 started trying that guff as well. DS1 used to come in with the 'I'm hungry' at 4am....actually no youre not!

    I am there for them if they need it, like a nightmare, but if its the 'fix my blankets', I have gone and fixed them and I was gruff about it and said that you can fix them (this happened for a few months) but just reiterated in the morning that they dont need to come in and wake me for that. They can sort it themselves and they can only come in if they are sick, etc.

    May seem harsh but they are old enough to know that its sleep time and resettle themselves.

    I always discuss why they woke and sort out if it is an issue in the morning.

    Maybe you can chat to her about it during the day and start reinforcing the 'no waking mummy' rule.

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  5. #33
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    Meh. I'm happy be a hard-a*se. It's worked. DD adores me, we spend plenty of time together. When I am sleeping though, that is not time we need to be spending together. She either pull her own blankets up, or I'll be cranky about it.

    PG, I understand why you are frustrated and I don't think it means your child is simply starved of love and affection and attention. IMO, if that were the only reason for this type of behaviour, then pretty much all by neglectful parents would have perfect sleepers.

  6. #34
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    Default never felt so angry

    Quote Originally Posted by MsOptimistic View Post
    She's four comfort the poor kid... !!
    Yeah that's really not helpful AT ALL!!! In the perfect world (or maybe the perfect mother?) can function on 2 hrs sleep broken down to 15 min intervals all whilst maintaining a pleasant demeanour ... I can't!


    Op ... I hear ya!!! Totally understand where your middle of the night vent was coming from. My ds (4yo) sneaks into our room occassionaly during the night and I can't function or pretend to be nice (23 wks preg ATM and have a2yo I usually have to get up to twice a night to literally put the doona over _ so annoying!!!) dh deals with Ds and puts him back in bed and I usually talk to him about it the next day and that seems to sort it. Just a relaxed convo ... Why were you up last night? You really need to stay in bed etc.

    I assume she is in a single bed ... How about a double doona you can tuck in but it's left loose on top???
    Last edited by DQ; 04-09-2012 at 20:04.

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  8. #35
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    Default Re: never felt so angry

    You mentioned she doesn't do it for grandma - can she have a visit with grandma for a few nights so you can catch up on some sleep?

    Hope you have a nice date night!

    Would some form of bribery help?

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  9. #36
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    Default Re: never felt so angry

    My ds is 2 BUT it is rude and inconsiderate to wake someone for something like 'pull my blanket up'.

    He tries that at 4 and he'll find himself in a sleeping bag.

    Op can you try a bed sock / sleeping bag or nightlite (or both?)

    Is she allowed to come hop into your bed if she wakes?

    With ds if he wakes during the night i am teaching him to come in and climb into my bed (rather than wake me by calling out).

    Also maybe make some time after bath where you can snuggle, read books etc & re cap the day.

    I understand how enraging constant broken sleep can be, ds is 2 yr 3 months and has only JUST started sleeping decent blocks of sleep in the last month
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    PG I understand. Mine is nearly four and he calls out for hours, "Mum, I'm hungry....Mum, I'm hungry....Mum, I'm hungry....". It's infuriating to say the least. I'm hard and firm and trying not to give in, but it's hard.
    Last edited by DQ; 04-09-2012 at 20:05.

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  12. #38
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    Default never felt so angry

    My 4yo has JUST come out of similar behaviour. Literally calling me every 15 minutes for something totally unimportant, right through the night. Even just to say goodnight again. It was hell.
    I got seriously hardass in the end, I just couldn't cope any more. The more I responded to her, the more she did it.

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    Default Re: never felt so angry

    I have battled DD sleep her whole 4 years of life. Nothing has ever worked for us but I can tell u all the tips! Don't talk to her if u go in, pay her no attention. It's not about u pulling the blankets up its about whatever else it is she's getting from u when u do it. It is so awful when they do these and all u want is a full nights sleep. Maybe call one of the sleep schools for tips.

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    Default Re: never felt so angry

    This may or may not help someone... But this is how I treat my Son each and every day :

    I treat him as if it is the last time I may ever see him, because we never know what the next minute, day or week may hold. I know that if something ever happened to my Son I would regret any shouting, and hard core discipline tactics SO much!

    P. S I'm not expecting something bad to happen... I try to live each day as if it were my last


 

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