+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 10 of 10
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    825
    Thanks
    126
    Thanked
    154
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Starting to panic...

    I am 23 weeks pregnant and have a high spirited 2.5yo and my partner works away.

    Lately i have been getting very anxious on just how i am going to cope with a nb and toddler. Our 1st had colic and has always been a terrible sleeper, however life is just getting easy now and i am really enjoying being around DS lately. I hope that came across the right way, i have always loved him dearly but at times he was really hard work and now he is older i just love teaching him things and i am finding this age is so rewarding.

    I don't know if i will be able to be as patient and giving with this one as i was with DS, i sometimes feel i have nothing left in the tank.

    My thoughts are very focussed on what would i do if the nb is very hard work also. How will my son feel, how will i cope?

    Hubby will be home for 5 weeks after bubs is born and i will also have help of mum and mil, but i just cant shake this feeling of dreading of the first few months, where i want to be excited about our little one who will be joining us soon.

    Don't know if this is just a vent for me or what. But if u have any tips, experiences or stories to share i'd very much appreciated it.

    Thankyou !

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    'Stralia
    Posts
    947
    Thanks
    386
    Thanked
    95
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Starting to panic...

    Aww I don't have personal experience in this field but I know a lot of friends who have been in this situation and my sil is reaching a similar point. All you can really do is to try to relax (difficult I know) and ask your mum, mil and partner for help more often just so you can keep your mind at a more patient point and not feel like the tank is empty.
    I really hope your new one comes and settles in nicely and you have no troubles

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    825
    Thanks
    126
    Thanked
    154
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Starting to panic...

    Thankyou

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Posts
    904
    Thanks
    67
    Thanked
    237
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Starting to panic...

    Think the worst so you will be thrilled when it isn't so bad ;-)
    I have 3 boys all with 2.3 years between them and bringing the second home was pretty breezy besides recover from Emergency C.
    I thought it would be hell and that I wouldn't cope, that I would need all the help in the world!
    Hubby was home 1 week and I never had help from anyone else.
    Its natural to be scared and to wonder how you could possibly have anything left to give. It's also natural to be scared of how your relationship with your 1st may change.
    I'm sure you will be perfectly fine :-)

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    605
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    82
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Starting to panic...

    Hey OP, I kinda know how you're feeling. I'm 28 weeks along with no2 on the way, and the further along I get in my pregnancy, the more worried I am about how I'm going to cope! I think back to the first few months with DD1 and remember how tough it was.. We had so many issues with breastfeeding, I was recovering from a c-sec, DD was a colicky and a silent reflux baby and would scream for hours on end each evening, I barely slept coz DD woke numerous times each nite.. And I was living with my parents at the time, so I had support yet barely coped.

    I'm terrified little bub will be the same, and I don't know how I'm going to pay as much attention to DD1 who's been the centre of my world for the last 23 months! also DD1 has only just started sleeping through the nite (mostly) and she's very verbal/communicative so life is just getting easier so the thought of sleepless nites again.. Add to that i won't have my family around 24/7 like I did last time, and while hubby doesn't work away, he works at least 6 days a week, usually 12 hr days, so he's not around for pretty much all of bub's waking hours.

    I don't feel as connected to this bub (not as much as DD1) coz I had time to sit around and talk to DD1 in my belly while this time I'm too busy taking care of my energetic toddler!!! I haven't even thought of names!

    BUT my mum assures me the second time round will be easier coz I'll be more confident... And I have a girlfriend who just lived through this so I know it's possible I think it's good having someone to talk to, to help alleviate my fears...

    I'm sure we'll be fine! Bubs will arrive, we'll be excited, love them to bits, and realise we worked ourselves up for (mostly) no reason

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Posts
    140
    Thanks
    14
    Thanked
    27
    Reviews
    0

    Default Re: Starting to panic...

    I have a two yo and a two month old. The first seven weeks were hell to be honest. It's only now that I've started to get 6 hours straight sleep at night that its gotten better, only in the last couple of weeks this has been happening.
    The guilt I felt from not giving my toddler as much attention was huge but I tried to keep to his routine and activities etc. If I only got 4 hours sleep one night for instance I still went out the next day to playgroup or whatever. I didn't let the baby ruin it for ds even though I was dead tired. Just remember most of us have been through it and we turned out fine, and so did our mums!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    825
    Thanks
    126
    Thanked
    154
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Starting to panic...

    Thankyou, nice to know these thoughts and feelings are normal

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Perth
    Posts
    3,116
    Thanks
    88
    Thanked
    266
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    You just manage. Some days just feeding everyone is enough.

    My boys are 20 months apart and both very wakeful, I had them both waking for the first six months of having two! My husband does FIFO work so there were some stages that were really really hard but I just muddled through. Sometimes you need to forget the housework, getting dressed or going out... sometimes toast for all three meals is ok...

    It will get easier. I had a couple of years where it was hard work but now my boys are 5.5 and nearly 4, they go to bed early and they go to school or kindy and my life is much easier than those baby+toddler days

  9. #9
    headoverfeet's Avatar
    headoverfeet is offline The truth will set you free, but first it will **** you off. -Gloria Steinem
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    18,954
    Thanks
    3,142
    Thanked
    4,892
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week

    Default Starting to panic...

    Quote Originally Posted by Laksa View Post
    You just manage. Some days just feeding everyone is enough.

    My boys are 20 months apart and both very wakeful, I had them both waking for the first six months of having two! My husband does FIFO work so there were some stages that were really really hard but I just muddled through. Sometimes you need to forget the housework, getting dressed or going out... sometimes toast for all three meals is ok...

    It will get easier. I had a couple of years where it was hard work but now my boys are 5.5 and nearly 4, they go to bed early and they go to school or kindy and my life is much easier than those baby+toddler days
    This, except we have kindy and preschool next year! I honestly didn't find it that hard in the early weeks, my hubby had 6 weeks off and after that I was on my own!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    825
    Thanks
    126
    Thanked
    154
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Starting to panic...

    Quote Originally Posted by Laksa View Post
    You just manage. Some days just feeding everyone is enough.

    My boys are 20 months apart and both very wakeful, I had them both waking for the first six months of having two! My husband does FIFO work so there were some stages that were really really hard but I just muddled through. Sometimes you need to forget the housework, getting dressed or going out... sometimes toast for all three meals is ok...

    It will get easier. I had a couple of years where it was hard work but now my boys are 5.5 and nearly 4, they go to bed early and they go to school or kindy and my life is much easier than those baby+toddler days
    Thank you! You've highlighted another fear....what if its another few years before it gets easier again. LOL


 

Similar Threads

  1. How do I not panic about this?
    By Fluffbum in forum Pregnancy & Birth General Chat
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 03-07-2012, 13:22
  2. Replies: 13
    Last Post: 05-04-2012, 11:36
  3. Should I panic?
    By ABigDeepBreath in forum Pregnancy Health Issues
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 17-01-2012, 20:35

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Bamboo Lulu
Super soft, fun prints & basics for baby, made from bamboo & organic cotton plus non-toxic wooden toys. • Hypoallergenic - perfect for eczema relief • Everything needed to shop for a baby shower • 10% off + FREE gift with purchase. Use code BUBHUB
sales & new stuffsee all
Wendys Music School Melbourne
Wondering about Music Lessons? FREE 30 minute ASSESSMENT. Find out if your child is ready! Piano from age 3 years & Guitar, Singing, Drums, Violin from age 5. Lessons available for all ages. 35+ years experience. Structured program.
Use referral 'bubhub' when booking
featured supporter
Mini Maestros
Nurturing Confident Learners. Mini Maestros offers music classes for children 6 months to 5 years of age. It is the longest running and most successful Australian business of its kind.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!