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  1. #21
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    Default Tell me about your first moments as a new parent

    1st hour - shock as I had had a long and emotionally draining labour plus lots heaps of blood. Kept asking for my baby but she was too far away fr me.

    1st day - stunned - still recovering from labour.

    1st week home. Pretty good. I had bf down pat and all I was doing was feeding and sleeping. DH did the rest.

    1st month. Reality set in and I was lonely at home. Everyone was "giving me space" and it sucked.

    Dealing with the actual baby was easy as I was used to them. Dealing with the abject loneliness of being stuck at home was the worst ever. That's why I visit new parents regularly till they tell me to bugger off.

  2. #22
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    Default Re: Tell me about your first moments as a new parent

    Long labour, quite a few things going wrong, emergency csection, Had trouble really bonding, and I was just in shock and quite a lot of pain, so I just held him continually for days because I was numb and I needed to hold him because I just didn't feel connected to him otherwise. My mum stayed for a week, when she left our first night alone jasper screamed for hours for no reason. I finally put him down around midnight -awake but not crying and came back 5 minutes later he was pale and blue and not breathing. He was fine, he started up again after a couple of minutes, and made us look like crazy people by the time we were in hospital he was like nothing had ever happened.

    But yeah. Totally screwed me up... first time I really put him down he stopped breathing. Awesome start to parenthood! (And everything was right, on his back, firmly tucked in, nothing in the cot etc)

    Df and I had an awkward giggle our second day home with katelyn that we got through a whole day and night without killing her.



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  4. #23
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    Default Tell me about your first moments as a new parent

    I'm not sure if they are everywhere, but we have a parents and babies unit at one of the hospitals here and they are a great source of information. The nurses are lovely and they have some great DVDs on settling and feeding etc. I wish I'd been in and watched some before I'd had my son. Might be worth having a google to see if there's one close by to you

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    It was weird.

    I had a caesarean (that I didn't want, so was feeling a bit crap about that), and I went from laying on a bed, to there's a baby right there and it's mine. I didn't get to hold her right away... but I saw her. My first thought was, "What a massive head."

    They then took her away, tried to get her to breathe, and then brought her back over a while later and she wrapped in a hot pink towel. Her little face was so pink too, and all I could see was her head wrapped in this pink towel so I thought, "Awww... she looks like a strawberry."

    Later I was wheeled into special care where she was (due to not breathing for 11 mins after her delivery - she was fine, but they were just making sure. I was given her, but I wasn't sitting up yet so I just kinda had this baby laying on my chest all awkwardly while I was flat on my back too. It was weird, and I kept thinking, "Um, take this thing off me!" I loved her... but I dunno, I didn't know her, so it was just weird.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia View Post

    Dealing with the actual baby was easy as I was used to them. Dealing with the abject loneliness of being stuck at home was the worst ever. That's why I visit new parents regularly till they tell me to bugger off.

    I hadnt considered the loneliness at all!!

  7. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boobycino View Post
    Long labour, quite a few things going wrong, emergency csection, Had trouble really bonding, and I was just in shock and quite a lot of pain, so I just held him continually for days because I was numb and I needed to hold him because I just didn't feel connected to him otherwise. My mum stayed for a week, when she left our first night alone jasper screamed for hours for no reason. I finally put him down around midnight -awake but not crying and came back 5 minutes later he was pale and blue and not breathing. He was fine, he started up again after a couple of minutes, and made us look like crazy people by the time we were in hospital he was like nothing had ever happened.

    But yeah. Totally screwed me up... first time I really put him down he stopped breathing. Awesome start to parenthood! (And everything was right, on his back, firmly tucked in, nothing in the cot etc)

    Df and I had an awkward giggle our second day home with katelyn that we got through a whole day and night without killing her.



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    Thats a very intense experience !! Oh my gosh as a new parent it would be so stressful and terrifying!!

    My mum told me she went from the hospital to her mums house. She changed me and used her new swaddling skills she learnt in hospital and put me over her shoulder. A few minutes later my nan saw me over my mums shoulder and I was blue! Mum had swaddled me so tight around my neck she cut off my air supply!! Needless to say she never swaddled me again!

  8. #27
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    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
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    I freaked out after the birth when we were still in the birth centre. I was staring down at our baby, all of our visitors had left and DH was napping...and I thought "Omg. I have no idea what to do with this!" I had NEVER changed a nappy before and I had never breastfed. It suddenly hit home that I had to care for this helpless infant and I didn't know how. My freak out level was well above 10

    When I came home, it was just DH and I, and I honestly wasn't freaking out. I was really excited about bringing our baby home and starting our new family life...I felt a little more relaxed than on the first day

  9. #28
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    When my first was born i was completely lost. I had literally never changed a nappy before or had much to do with babies, i was scared i'd break her. I was also eerily calm though, i had DH with me in hospital and bub slept a lot of the time, i just looked are her thinking 'wow, i had a baby, pretty amazing'.
    When i got home i freaked out. I was completely alone as 3 days after DD was born DH was sent away for work, for a pretty long time. Bub wasn't sleeping as much and i feel pretty hopeless. I cried a lot and was unsure about everything. It felt very lonely.
    It got better, i developed a bit of a groove. I remember DD used to sleep 3 hours in the late morning and that was my time to breathe, i got used to not sleeping much at night and breastfeeding got easier.
    Looking after a newborn all by myself was one the hardest things i have ever done but it was also pretty special and i feel proud i survived reasonably well considering.

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    Default Tell me about your first moments as a new parent

    We left hospital at about 4pm, after dinner I went straight to bed and laid there and cried coz I felt like I had made such a big mistake. I was in pain from stitches, pain from feeding and baby blues had kicked in big time. I was dreading DH bringing her to me for a feed and just felt so lost. Thank god for DH. Not at all how I pictured our first moments at home, I thought it would be all 'staring at the baby sleeping feeling so much love blah blah blah'

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    Default Tell me about your first moments as a new parent

    Quote Originally Posted by Disney View Post
    Are there books about what to do with a newborn? Both my DH and I have never even held a newborn let alone been around one eek!!
    To be honest I didn't really read many actual books on parenting! I read more on pregnancy/birth. I read Baby Love by Robin Barker before bubs arrived which had a lot of useful information and a lot of stuff that I didn't really agree with. I think the best thing to do would be to read as much as you can because you will find info that really sits with you well and other stuff that doesn't and you'll be able to get an idea of your preferred parenting style.

    But because I didn't read up much before hand I really relied on Bub Hub and the Internet! I found just going through old posts here really helpful because I can guarantee that someone has asked the same question you want answered before! It's also helpful to have the opinions of other parents!

    What saved me in terms of settling my daughter was 'the happiest baby on the block' by dr Harvey Karp. I actually just came across it on google one night at 3am when I was desperate for some ideas on how to get her to sleep! There's a basic outline of his ideas on YouTube and I just adapted that to suit me and my baby! I found the first week I was really lost because I was up and down all the time with bubs and day blended into night to the point where I had no idea what time it was and I wasn't eating properly. Once I read up on Harvey Karps ideas I was able to implement a bedtime ritual of bath, massage, swaddle, feed and sleep. Once this was done I knew it was night time, and sleep time so when bubs woke I'd make sure I kept the lights dim, and keep quiet except for the white noise. Getting that differentiatin between night and day back really kept me sane and I think thats what helped my daughter to become such a great sleeper!!

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