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  1. #11
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    Default Recovery Orders?

    Quote Originally Posted by HarvestMoon View Post
    I was wondering if they would make me take the kids out of their current school and daycare, make me give up my job and current study commitments and move back interstate?
    Hopefully, given thats it's been almost a year it won't come to that. I'm still worried what move the ex will make next though.

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    I would be highly highly doubtful. A year is a long time.
    Support networks are also taken into consideration. Have you got family etc where you are? What about interstate?
    Get involved in as much as possible in your community/school etc. make sure you have the kids enrolled in activities/sports etc.
    Make sure you have an established doctor and health support system.
    You could even get advice from a psychologist to say that a move for either you or the children would be traumatic and upsetting.
    Stay in your job and keep studying! A move would be incredibly disruptive for both these things.
    All these sorts of things can be used as evidence against a recovery order.
    Also start a diary! Detail every bit of contact he has with the kids and you.
    Backdate it as far as you can remember.

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to faroutbrusselsprout For This Useful Post:

    HugsBunny  (28-08-2012)

  3. #12
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    Default Recovery Orders?

    Ms truth and fobs have given you terrific advice! If it's been almost a year then you *should* be fine but it's best to start a diary as fobs said just in case.

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    Default Re: Recovery Orders?

    Thats really good to hear he probably wouldn't succeed going down that path.
    What sort of legal victory would he be likely to have against me though?
    He has no interest in the kids. He's interest lies soley with me and getting back together.


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    My ex asked for a recovery order 6 months after we moved- was 9 months by the time we got to court- but it was refused as I'd only moved 60km to the next town (was a big deal for my ex as he is serving a 4 year licence disqualification for drink driving).

    When we did go through the court process I saw a few other recovery order requests; in one case the parents lived 2.5 hours apart and the judge refused it because the father hadn't been paying child support for the 2 kids (when they looked at his financials he had a new job since filing his last tax return and was making big $$ but hadn't declared to CSA- he was paying $25 a week for 2 kids).

    IMO the longer he waits the less likelihood he has of any application being successful. When you have ties and the children are settled then he wouldn't have much luck.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HarvestMoon View Post
    What sort of legal victory would he be likely to have against me though?
    He has no interest in the kids. He's interest lies soley with me and getting back together.


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    Realistically:
    A) he travels to your town and checks into a hotel to see the kids a few times a year
    B) the kids are transported to his town a couple of times a year to spend time with him
    In all honesty if he's got no interest in the kids even if this was court ordered he'd probably not turn up on the day.

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    It's good to hear he probably won't have much luck if he goes down the legal path.
    He seems to think that he should be allowed to visit and stay with me. I don't want this but fear if i don't comply he may follow through with legal action. He's an absolute psychopath. At one point he tried to strangle my DS because he was sick and wouldn't stop crying. It took everything in me to pry his revolting fingers from around DS's neck. The worst thing about it is he never showed remorse and justifies his actions to this day. I don't want DS left with this guy ever but i know if he does take legal action he will get access and there will be nothing i can do about it. On the other hand i can let the feral prick here to keep things somewhat supervised but then i have to put up with his unwanted advances amongst everything else. It's so hard. I don't know what the best way to deal with this is.

  8. #17
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    Default Recovery Orders?

    You would never be forced to let him stay with you. You also have a right of reply if it did get to court. Also given the time frame, he wouldn't get an urgent interim hearing and would have to go through mediation first.

    Did you document/report the incident with your DS? Or any domestic abuse towards you?

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    Default Re: Recovery Orders?

    Quote Originally Posted by HugsBunny View Post
    You would never be forced to let him stay with you. You also have a right of reply if it did get to court. Also given the time frame, he wouldn't get an urgent interim hearing and would have to go through mediation first.

    Did you document/report the incident with your DS? Or any domestic abuse towards you?
    Yes it was all reported. I had a dvo against him. Apparently the kids couldn't be added to it because there was no proof of abuse towards them. I would have needed someone else to witness it.

    What kind of trouble would i get into if i severed all contact by changing my phone number and the likes?

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    Default Recovery Orders?

    Does he have any contact with the kids at all? How long has it been since he's seen them? Do you have an agreement in place as to when he can see them?

    ETA - do you think he could afford to take you to court? Sounds like he wouldn't be very successful even if he did take it that far.

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    Default Re: Recovery Orders?

    My husband file recovery orders 18 months after his ex abducted (parental abduction) his daughter to another state without his knowing...(it took him that long to find her).

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