I think you need to find out what his 'religious' beliefs are. I've yet to hear of a religion that insists he be at hospital with the mother and that the mother must not have any other contact with her support network otherwise he will start threatening violence. Anyway, religion is NO excuse for abusive, negligent and dishonourable behaviour. People seem to think that just because something is someone's religion that it MUST be allowed, no questions asked and if you do question you're deemed to being rude, incentive and intolerable. No!
Does anyone know where that information is on the cycle of abuse? I think that might be great reading for the OP.
OP - as I said before, please keep posting. It doesn't necessarily have to be on this issue, we think you need support and the hubbers are hear to listen and help. xxx