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  1. #21
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    Default I am useless :(

    So Loco I sympathies with you. Oh and I always think other mums all have it together too... But I'm sure they have their bad days too. I'm sure your a fantastic mum xx

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    LoCo  (28-08-2012)

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    On the 'other mums have it all together' thing...

    Everyone I know thought that about me. They were so wrong. When I 'fessed up about my terrible anxiety and feelings of failure as a Mother they were all gobsmacked.

    What I discovered then is most Mums struggle. We all struggle differently, but most of us do. Be kind to yourself. Forget about what you can show your DD and just be her Mum. SHe will love you to the ends of the earth simply because you are her Mum. You are the single most important person in her life. SHe does not care about gifts and talents (of which I'm sure you do have some, BTW). Just be you. It's all she wants and will ever need.

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    LoCo  (28-08-2012)

  5. #23
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    Default I am useless :(

    Omg hello me 5.5 years ago!!!
    I had one kid , hubby worked interstate, I was 22, had a 1 year old and married, all my friends single and carefree.
    **** cook, no hobby, rare friendships, no job and 12 kilos heavier!!!
    5.5 years later I have DS6.5, DS4 and DS2 planning TTC next year for our 4th! I'm an awesome cook, play netball twice a week, go on a 1000step walk every fortnight , have a playgroup I go to every Friday and this year I lost all my weight (which ended up being 24 kilos after I had the 3 of them).
    Life only gets better if you make it better, I recommend joining your local play group :-) you won't regret it!!!

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    LoCo  (28-08-2012)

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    Default I am useless :(

    Thanks for the replies. Much better this week. This forum honestly helps so much at times. X

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    Default I am useless :(

    Quote Originally Posted by JimmyJams Mum View Post
    So Loco I sympathies with you. Oh and I always think other mums all have it together too... But I'm sure they have their bad days too. I'm sure your a fantastic mum xx
    I am so sorry you are feeling the way you are its not nice. I'd be your friend but I'm on the other side of Aust.

  9. #26
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    Default Re: I am useless :(

    Hugs loco.

    I have so many days like that, that good days seem like shooting stars.

    Where in WA are you?

    Sent from my GT-I9300T using BubHub

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    LoCo  (31-08-2012)

  11. #27
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    London is offline “I think we're losing our sense of humor instead of being able to relax and laugh at ourselves" - Betty White
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    Hugs Loco

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    LoCo  (31-08-2012)

  13. #28
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    Honey I too could have written this post word for word 6 months ago just before being diagnosed with PND. Maybe it might help talking to someone about it.

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    LoCo  (31-08-2012)

  15. #29
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    LoCo, my mum was no domestic goddess, and she didn't sing, dance, etc.

    But I love her because of who she is. I love her because she was always there for me when I needed her (and still is). I love her because she would listen to me prattle on about all my worries, all my teen dramas/ boyfriend issues/ friend dramas, etc. I love her because I know that she loves me and has always been there for me, and will do anything to help me.

    The other stuff you describe is just surface stuff. I couldn't care less about my mum's individual talents. I care because she'll sit through a Eurovision Song Contest marathon with me, even though I know it doesn't interest her, just because that was some random family tradition we both started when I was a kid and it reminds us both of that.

    Your child won't care about your 'accomplishments'. Those are things that make life more fun for you, and give people a way of talking about you and showing off about you. But really they're just a way of describing how much you love someone and how proud you are of them. When I talk about how awesome my Dad is at the piano, or his career, or his love of literature, (or whatever) I'm not saying that because I really really care about those things. I'm saying them because I love him and I'm proud of him. If he didn't do those things there are other things I would talk about. And your child will always find plenty to talk about when you're a good loving mum (which it sounds as if you are).


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    LoCo  (31-08-2012)

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    Default I am useless :(

    Perception is a killer, is all I will say. Stop comparing yourself to other women. We all have our faults and talents, I'm sure your daughter will admire you regardless just like you did your mother. You are good enough, I can promise you that. Start focusing on the positive and what you CAN do, she needs to learn anything is possible and you'll be unable to do that if your approaching mantra is 'I can't.' Because you can

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    LoCo  (31-08-2012)


 

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