I have the blues today feeling so useless.
I see other mums and they just have it all together. The single mums especially I see them as these power lords. For me I have 1 baby and just don't know how other mums do more than 1. I always use the excuse that I have no help, I get no sleep, I do all the housework cooking etc. But blah blah blah big deal this is motherhood at least I get to be a sahm.
I don't go out often as DD can be a handful so I have to choose my days when I have the right energy and frame of mind. Other mums just get on with it even with 3 or 4 kids they don't sit and whine like I do. They don't assess their energy levels for the day they just get on with it.
I have no purpose in life, no direction. I had to leave home study because I couldn't cope with a baby smashing on my laptop and ripping up my papers. (I have no one to look after her) DH said no he is way to busy at work.
I have no special gifts!! I see other mums so good at baking, sewing even blogging. So many mums make money blogging.
I can't paint, I can't draw and my grammar isn't the best in the world so it's not like I'll ever be a writer.
I thought I was a great cook but MasterChef has shattered that belief.
What the hell am I here for? What am I going to show my daughter?
Growing up my mum was the best cook, she made my clothes and birthday cakes plus was a singer on day time tv. She was perfect she was popular I thought she was just wow. What will my daughter think of me? Haha "my mum is awesome she stays home, hates people, is a loner can't bake, sew, sing or dance" I want to be just like her!?????
I am a hermit. I have no "real" friends and the ones I do either live 1 hour away or have 4 kids and seem to be on another level with me just because I only have the 1.
Aaahhhhhhh feel a bit better now. Needed to get that out. Hope I don't offend anyone with my post. It's me not you