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  1. #61
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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    Also having someone with special needs in your family is a blessing, it opens you up to experiences and understandings you might otherwise overlook. This bride doesn't deserve the blessings that come from having a special needs person in your life.

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  3. #62
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    Default Re: Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    Quote Originally Posted by Renesme View Post
    If it were ONE child I'd have a problem.. if it were just no children than fair enough. I personally wouldn't attend if a Wedding said no children anyway.
    But if there were 5 people with a disability who were close to the family, and they were all excluded? Is that ok, blanket ban?

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    Out of curiosity, and just to play devils advocate, what if the bride has a fear of him? It's not her being a bridezilla or anything, but she has a genuine fear of people with disabilities? I know a few people who do, and they deeply regret it, but there's nothing they can do about it and they try very, very hard.
    Would you be expected to be terrified of one of your guests for your entire wedding, just so that the family doesn't get angry/upset?? Is your "special day" not a day for you to be happy and relaxed and surrounded by people you love and who love you??
    I'm not saying she doesn't love him, but it's possible she's made uncomfortable and is scared of him.

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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    It's never ok to exclude somebody because of their disability.
    Comparing a child free wedding to one that excludes people with disabilities is like comparing apples and oranges.

    This man isn't a child, he is an adult. He has a disability that would see him discriminated against for his entire life.

    To exclude children from a wedding, whilst not something I would do, is understandable for a long list of reasons. Alcohol consumption, tiring easily, becoming bored..... The list goes on.

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  7. #65
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    This has really got me thinking, I initially posted a reply saying it was discusting and I can understand "no children" but not " no autistic" then I thought, what's the difference? What's the difference between descriminating against children and descriminating against disabled?

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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    What nasty little girl! Girl, not woman as she is obviously narrow minded, self centred and ignorant!

    I would not attend.

    I would personally drop in to visit my nephew and the bride to give my RSVP and explain why I am not attending.

    Let them feel the discomfort of that conversation face to face!

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    wherewerewe91  (19-08-2012)

  10. #67
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    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    Quote Originally Posted by Lil M View Post
    This has really got me thinking, I initially posted a reply saying it was discusting and I can understand "no children" but not " no autistic" then I thought, what's the difference? What's the difference between descriminating against children and descriminating against disabled?
    Because he is an adult and he is not being treated the same as the other adults.

    Children get to grow up and attend weddings as adults. If this man is constantly being treated like this, he will never be given that opportunity and he is already an adult. How unfair It's fücking disgusting.

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    Well I don't think it's okay at all to have a ban against people with a disability unless they are a genuine risk of ruining the wedding. His parents are responsible for him.. they could just politely ask that they take him out if he becomes disruptive.

    If the bride has a fear of him she needs to confront that fear. You're right it's their day to feel happy and share a special day with those they love and who love them.. this is for BOTH parties not just one.. the GROOM wants to share his special day with his cousin and should be able to. Unfortunately if this came up between DH and I... I"m afraid it would most likely split us up as I couldn't be with someone so selfish and closed hearted.

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    Bubmum  (19-08-2012)

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    Kids grow up and in time can attend as many weddings as they wish. This man is disabled for life and with that has had to deal with enough cr@p. Some compassion from the bride about one day wouldn't hurt.

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  16. #70
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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    Quote Originally Posted by Jennaisme View Post
    Out of curiosity, and just to play devils advocate, what if the bride has a fear of him? It's not her being a bridezilla or anything, but she has a genuine fear of people with disabilities? I know a few people who do, and they deeply regret it, but there's nothing they can do about it and they try very, very hard.
    Would you be expected to be terrified of one of your guests for your entire wedding, just so that the family doesn't get angry/upset?? Is your "special day" not a day for you to be happy and relaxed and surrounded by people you love and who love you??
    I'm not saying she doesn't love him, but it's possible she's made uncomfortable and is scared of him.
    I'll play along....

    If the above was truly the case, then at least have the decency to have that conversation with the young man's mother face to face, prior to sending out the invitation that excludes him.

    I find it very cowardly that they just omitted his name from the invite.

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