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  1. #1
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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    My neighbour from 2 doors down has just left my house upset. On Friday she received an invitation addressed to her and her husband to attend her nephew's wedding to be held in January. They have a 22 year old son with severe autism. He rocks, moans, is not independently toiletted, and has limited speech. He's a great young man, very gentle and usually compliant. I mind him twice a week so that his mother can run errands and attend her bible study group. We usually sit outside with the baby - he loves to swing her gently in her jolly jumper or he brings his carpentry set and plays contentedly with his hammer, wood and nails and he's just a gem. He is never aggressive. There's an excellent chance that my baby's first word will be his name as she just adores him.

    My neighbour called her sister (mother of the groom) to ask if her son was invited as his name was not on the invitation. MOG called her son and the answer was no. Apparently it has been a huge source of arguing between the bride and groom and her family. The groom wants his cousin to come as he has grown up with him and is used to him attending all family occasions. His bride is adamant she does not want him there ruining her day, interrupting the service with his noises or having to worry about his unpredictable behaviour. The groom caved to her and her family requests that his cousin be excluded. There will be quite a few other younger children at the service and some over 12s at the reception. All of the other cousins have been invited and were named on the addressed invitations.

    The young man regularly attends Sunday services at the church where the wedding will be held. He has been to weddings before and apart from his noises and rocking he behaves just like any other member of the congregation.

    My neighbour and her husband are so upset. Their son has never been excluded from a family occasion. She's unsure if they will attend; right now the insult is very raw. If they do attend she asked if I would have him for the afternoon which will not be a problem.

    So, the question I pose is this - her day, her way? Discriminatory or a reasonable request? Would you go or not?

  2. #2
    sweetsugardumplin''s Avatar
    sweetsugardumplin' is offline be the change you want to see in da world
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    I think it is highly discriminatory
    This young man is a family member, and his attendance obviously has special significance to the groom.
    I think the bride is being a self absorbed and selfish princess!

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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    If it was a blanket rule of no children then that would be fine- I would go and leave my child with someone else. In this case I would be totally offended too. This is blatant discrimination. I feel terrible for the parents and if I were them, no I would not be going.

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    I think it is really sad that the bride would be so against having him there, especially when it is someone the groom is close to and wanted to attend. I think she needs to get over herself, so what if he makes a few noises, he is family and should be able to attend.
    If i were the parent i would decline the invite out of insult.

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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    That's horrible

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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    How rude of the bride! I understand that she wants her day to go perfectly but that's no excuse to exclude her soon to be husbands cousin! The groom obviously wanted him there and its his day too!

    If I had got an invitation that excluded DS from attending I simply wouldn't go.

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    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    Oh, how awful. That bride must be a right, immature, precious little biatch.

    But, back to the issue at hand, I don't think I could go. How sad for the groom to have to make this choice and that even the brides family would support her in trying to exclude his cousin.


    ETA, I support a couples decision to exclude children, but I don't support excluding a family member because they have a disability.
    Last edited by SpecialPatrolGroup; 19-08-2012 at 13:53.

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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    What a nasty bride! I think that's completely discriminatory and I personally would not be attending!

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    Another revolting bridezilla demand.

    Offensive and repugnant - if the groom wants his cousin there and other cousins are invited then it's discriminatory.

    The groom needs to grow some.

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    Default Spinoff from 'no kids at weddings'

    The bride is a biatch. It's all her her her and she's willing to deeply offend her fiances family to keep it that way. The groom needs to get some
    Balls.

    If I were your neighbour I would boycott the wedding. No-one (even a hoighty toighty bride) makes my boy feel like a second class citizen.

    Imagine what sort of day the bride and groom would have if they just relaxed and welcomed everyone with open arms.

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