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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by MissMuppet View Post
    We have a password too. And I've we've also role played the lost puppy/lollipop situation, and she knows she has to check with us first.

    With regards to the comments about being nervous about males, only leaving kids with other women - I don't want to make anyone's anxiety worse, but please don't slip into thinking its a male issue only. There was an incident at the kindy DD went to, and the person involved was a female carer. That is not the only incident I know of first hand involving women either. I'm hesitant to mention it because I don't want to make people scared of everyone, but I think its important to be reminded that females can be predators too.

    (And I really hope I don't offend anyone - its just that incident at the kindy really hammered that home to me.)
    Very true. When I worked in child care, we had a boy and girl who were in their dads and grandmas custody because sexual assult from their mother.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Chrysanthemum View Post
    Thank you for this. I will be ordering.

    xx

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    That's so sad Cleigh.

    The password thing is : we have a password that DD knows. If we unexpectedly can't pick her up from school the person we send to collect her will know the password. So if a stranger comes to pick her up and says, 'its okay, your mum has sent me to get you as she's sick today', then DD won't go with them unless they know the password. And its something obscure so it can't be 'guessed' (ie not the pets name) and she knows not to tell anyone what the password is.

    With sleepovers - that's a really personal one and probably controversial. We don't do it based on what our policeman friend told us, but I don't think there's an official recommendation against it or any particular age guidelines. If you do do sleepovers, I think its important for the kids to know that they can call you and you'll pick them up at any time of the day or night.
    Last edited by MissMuppet; 17-08-2012 at 14:13.

  4. #34
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    Default What do you do to protect your children...warning, trigger topic

    I hope I am not crucified for asking this as its a genuine question but yes it's personal, but this situation worries me for the future 'sleepovers'.
    Has anyone ever been abused by a friends parent or visitor whilst you stayed at their house when you were a child?
    I understand friends family etc but the above freaks me out and I do wonder how common it is
    I mean absoloutely no disrespect and think you are all brave to share any experiences you may have had.

  5. #35
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    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
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    Quote Originally Posted by katatonic View Post
    I hope I am not crucified for asking this as its a genuine question but yes it's personal, but this situation worries me for the future 'sleepovers'.
    Has anyone ever been abused by a friends parent or visitor whilst you stayed at their house when you were a child?
    I understand friends family etc but the above freaks me out and I do wonder how common it is
    I mean absoloutely no disrespect and think you are all brave to share any experiences you may have had.
    In regards to the sleep overs, yes I have .

    And it is not uncommon. I have read a lot of reports with awful incidents involving sleepovers. You might know the mother of the other child and think you trust them enough for your kid to sleep there, but often you don't completely know the other family members or residents in the house, or neighbours, or family members dropping by, or friends dropping by. You might even THINK you know everyone very well, but at the end of the day, you never know, and you are not there if something does happen. I feel quite strongly about this topic.
    Last edited by Witwicky; 17-08-2012 at 14:42.

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    Default What do you do to protect your children...warning, trigger topic

    For those of you that say you don't do sleepovers, will you never allow sleepovers no matter what age they are?

  7. #37
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    Default Re: What do you do to protect your children...warning, trigger topic

    Subbing. I have nothing to add that hasn't already been said. I don't need to be told the statistics, I can guess at what it is from my own observations. I have always felt a bit uncomfortable about the sleepover issue and this thread has decided me, it won't be happening. Thanks for the links to the books and the password idea, I will definitely be implementing that one. Its sad that we have to do it but historically I think we are very well placed to protect our children, given the awareness that is generated in the media etc.

    **Nothing spells as goof ash typo splats**

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    Default What do you do to protect your children...warning, trigger topic

    Quote Originally Posted by katatonic View Post
    I hope I am not crucified for asking this as its a genuine question but yes it's personal, but this situation worries me for the future 'sleepovers'.
    Has anyone ever been abused by a friends parent or visitor whilst you stayed at their house when you were a child?
    I understand friends family etc but the above freaks me out and I do wonder how common it is
    I mean absoloutely no disrespect and think you are all brave to share any experiences you may have had.
    I was but by an older, female child, in my own house.

  9. #39
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    Witwicky is offline A closed mouth gathers no foot.
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    Default What do you do to protect your children...warning, trigger topic

    Quote Originally Posted by tadpoles View Post
    For those of you that say you don't do sleepovers, will you never allow sleepovers no matter what age they are?
    It's something I will assess as they get older and older, but I'm leaning towards a blanket no.

    *Trigger warning*

    I know a woman who was raped by her best friends father at a sleepover when she was 15 years old (her friend was asleep nearby). She was too petrified to move and just laid there until he was done. He was incarcerated for it but she will live with the mental scars forever. She was a teenager but still very vulnerable. Her parents were always concerned about her personal safety if she went to parties etc, I guess they thought nothing of old fashioned sleepovers

  10. #40
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    Default Re: What do you do to protect your children...warning, trigger topic

    I won't do sleepovers, I'll review that when they are teenagers but definitely not before.

    My concern is, how do I tell them how to protect themselves (when I'm not there) without destroying they innocence. I want them to have a childhood (I have 2 girls) without fear of the bad man (or woman) but they obviously gave to be prepared. Anyone care to talk about the conversations you had with your kids about thus topic?

    **Nothing spells as goof ash typo splats**


 
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