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  1. #21
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    For my DH. He just hasn't got any idea period. He only makes himself 2 minute noodles when I am not about. And he can't even make that properly. I am just happy that he feeds the child.

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennaisme View Post
    So, this is going to come out really harsh, and I do apologise. However.
    For the people who say that Dads feel like babysitters, and get angry that he doesn't stick to your food routine, your sleep routine, your dicipline routine, etc.
    Does anyone notice the most common word in that?
    YOUR food routine. YOUR sleep routine. YOUR discipline routine. Where is the "OUR" in it? Has anyone actually sat down and discussed with them and made a plan together? Or is it, you've decided how it's going to be, too bad, that's how it is?
    No wonder they refer to it as "I'm babysitting the kids" because, tbh, it is EXACTLY what he's doing. Yep, it's his kid, and it doesn't sound like he's had any choice in how the kid is raised, what goes into it, he's just gotta fall in line. Just like a babysitter. Have you asked your DPs/DHs/Dfs if they are comfortable with how you've single handedly decided to raise their kids? No? Then stop complaining when they do it differently.
    I see this SO much on BH. It drives me up the wall and makes me wanna tear my hair out.
    Well said.

  3. #23
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    Theophania is offline 'see what had happened was..there were these three ninjas and a blue monkey and well it really wasn't my fault..'
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    I haven't yet read all the replies so sorry if I am repeating someone. But this frustrates me also OP. I get it all the time from family members. They think my DH is hard done by because he is held just as accountable as I am with our children. Luckily for me DH is happy to be just as involved with our kiddies as I am and is normally the one to cook.

    I also hate how when fathers stay home with their children while the mother goes out its called babysitting... Ugh I really hate that mentality and I think its a cop out to say that parenting comes harder to fathers. If they bother to put in as much effort as the mother it should be no harder for them.
    Last edited by Theophania; 11-08-2012 at 14:34.

  4. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Thermolicious View Post
    I totally agree but I think that some mothers need to back off and quit hovering over their partners while they are parenting let them find their feet I might do 75% of the parenting in my house but hubby does his 25% without me yapping down his neck that he isn't doing it 'right' like me!
    Im not sure that was the point though... It's about doing basic things, and leaving the big jobs for mums to do.

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennaisme View Post
    So, this is going to come out really harsh, and I do apologise. However.
    For the people who say that Dads feel like babysitters, and get angry that he doesn't stick to your food routine, your sleep routine, your dicipline routine, etc.
    Does anyone notice the most common word in that?
    YOUR food routine. YOUR sleep routine. YOUR discipline routine. Where is the "OUR" in it? Has anyone actually sat down and discussed with them and made a plan together? Or is it, you've decided how it's going to be, too bad, that's how it is?
    No wonder they refer to it as "I'm babysitting the kids" because, tbh, it is EXACTLY what he's doing. Yep, it's his kid, and it doesn't sound like he's had any choice in how the kid is raised, what goes into it, he's just gotta fall in line. Just like a babysitter. Have you asked your DPs/DHs/Dfs if they are comfortable with how you've single handedly decided to raise their kids? No? Then stop complaining when they do it differently.
    I see this SO much on BH. It drives me up the wall and makes me wanna tear my hair out.
    Agree ... Whose children are they?? Why is it ok to constantly question a fathers parenting? Would it be ok for him to do the same???

  6. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Smartiecat For This Useful Post:

    Guest1234  (11-08-2012),headoverfeet  (11-08-2012)

  7. #26
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    The problem in the OP isn't that Dad is doing it "his way", it is Dad is doing it "the lazy way" because Mum will take on the responsibility make up for it.

    If Mum fed the child 2-minute noodles every time she was responsible for the child, you would all be going on about what a neglectful mother she is.

    But when it's Dad it's "oh the poor guy, he doesn't have a clue, he's hopeless cos he's a man, give him a break".

  8. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to shelle65 For This Useful Post:

    Alexander Beetle  (11-08-2012),Ellewood  (11-08-2012),Stiflers Mom  (11-08-2012),Theophania  (11-08-2012)

  9. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smartiecat View Post
    Agree ... Whose children are they?? Why is it ok to constantly question a fathers parenting? Would it be ok for him to do the same???
    A mothers' parenting gets questioned constantly! Haven't you seen all the threads on bubhub - "I was at the supermarket and I saw Mum give her child a chocolate bar!! Can you believe what a terrible mother???!!!"

  10. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to shelle65 For This Useful Post:

    Alexander Beetle  (11-08-2012),Ellewood  (11-08-2012)

  11. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smartiecat View Post
    Agree ... Whose children are they?? Why is it ok to constantly question a fathers parenting? Would it be ok for him to do the same???
    If the father is doing a bad job then yes, the mother has every right to question them. If the mother is doing the majority of the parenting then of course she would have a routine and ideas on how the children should be raised. If the father is an active and involved parent then yes, he has every right to question the mother.

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to Alexander Beetle For This Useful Post:

    Stiflers Mom  (11-08-2012)

  13. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    A mothers' parenting gets questioned constantly! Haven't you seen all the threads on bubhub - "I was at the supermarket and I saw Mum give her child a chocolate bar!! Can you believe what a terrible mother???!!!"
    No talking about the parents questioning each other ... Not strangers.

  14. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    A mothers' parenting gets questioned constantly! Haven't you seen all the threads on bubhub - "I was at the supermarket and I saw Mum give her child a chocolate bar!! Can you believe what a terrible mother???!!!"
    So true.


 

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