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  1. #1
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    Default Do as I say, not as I do? SPINOFF!

    Spinoff from the schoolies thread!

    In regards to parenting as your kids get older.

    I am in two minds. For example If I was a smoker (which I'm not) I guess I would find it hard to tell them not to smoke (though I would still try and educate them if I wasn't in the position to stop smoking.) However, as an ex, very heavy smoker, I will certainly be telling them I did used to smoke and the reasons why I don't think it's a good idea.

    I did alot of things as a teen and young adult that I wouldn't want for them in a million year. I am going to be honest about it but I don't think it makes me a hypocrit for not wanting them to go down that path. I will certainly be sharing experiences regarding drugs, drinking, unsafe s.ex, etc and hoping this plays a part in the choices they make. I certainly fdon't think that just because I made mistakes, went down wrong paths that it gives me no right to encourage them not to. It would be different I guess if I was still doing those things now.


    WDYT?

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    Spot on. Doesn't make you a hypocrite at all just a parent coming from experience.

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    Ffrenchknickers  (11-08-2012)

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    I think as parents it is our job to steer them towards the right path no matter what paths we took.

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    Ffrenchknickers  (11-08-2012)

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    For me, I will be telling them (if they want to know) about what I did, why I did it, and what I do and don't regret. I will try to be honest and open and hope that they learn from my mistakes! But once they are adults I can't stop them making their own choices.

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    Ffrenchknickers  (11-08-2012)

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    Bonkers is offline wishes she was a glow worm. A glow worm's never glum, 'cos how can you be grumpy when the sun shines out of your bum?
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    I don't think I didn't anything to bad... Their was a few times when in high school I did something bad. When I got older I did the norm like clubbing ect but no drugs... I'll be honest and try and steer these kids in the right direction... It's really all I can do

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    Perhaps a case of 'Do as I say, not as I did'.

    My kids are being raised in a very different environment from me though, so hopefully they'll follow a very different path to adulthood too.

    I think its wise to learn from our mistakes, and to learn from the mistakes of others - so I'll be encouraging my kids to learn from my mistakes.

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    Theophania is offline 'see what had happened was..there were these three ninjas and a blue monkey and well it really wasn't my fault..'
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    There are some things about my past that I will not share with my children. I just don't think it is appropriate. And of course I will be parenting in a do as I say not as I do attitude,I won't be encouraging the types of things I did. But if they do follow the same path I did, I will share what I can with them, even though I know they can't learn through my mistakes. I will try and guide them as best I can...

    See its thinking about this kind of stuff that freaks me out

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    Quote Originally Posted by MissMuppet View Post
    Perhaps a case of 'Do as I say, not as I did'.

    .
    Well said

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    If I was still doing things I'd tell my kids not to do, then that would be hypocritical.
    But as it stands today, I don't do anything that I wouldn't want my kids doing when they are older.
    As for past experiences and things I did, it's part of living and I can't guarantee my children wont do them, I'll just discourage it and educate them as to why I discourage it. I guess I didn't really do anything overly 'bad' and I do put a lot of the things I did down to complete rebellion. I plan to parent differently to what my parents did, and handle things differently, and I think by doing so that my children won't really NEED to rebel, and that we would have an open, honest and trusting relationship.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bell & Bug View Post
    If I was still doing things I'd tell my kids not to do, then that would be hypocritical.
    But as it stands today, I don't do anything that I wouldn't want my kids doing when they are older.
    As for past experiences and things I did, it's part of living and I can't guarantee my children wont do them, I'll just discourage it and educate them as to why I discourage it. I guess I didn't really do anything overly 'bad' and I do put a lot of the things I did down to complete rebellion. I plan to parent differently to what my parents did, and handle things differently, and I think by doing so that my children won't really NEED to rebel, and that we would have an open, honest and trusting relationship.
    I feel exactly the same. Except for maybe my bubhub addiction...I am not being a good role model there.


 

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