I had my 12 week ultra sound just over a hr ago. I saw her little heart beating, I was so happy, iv had a bay feeling about this pregnancy for some time now, not one person believed me when I said I think something is wrong, they all said I was just being a worry wart.... Turns out my babies skin on the back of the neck is way to thick, I have to get a sample taken of the placenta. I think about what I did wrong to cause this on my baby? I am feeling so guilty. I need to make a choice, I know that much, and I'm pretty sure I know what I'll chose... I think it would be for the best, I have to worry about 2 other little people as well. I have to wait till Friday to see me doctor now so he can referee me to the ante natel clinic even tho I have my appt booked and everything for the end of the month. I feel so alone, I havnt told my parents yet, I don't know what to say to them. How would I word it? How would they react? They live on the other side of aus. I am all alone. I never thought this would happen to me, or ild be in this position to make this choice... How will I move forward from this? What happens next? I'm just left here till Friday with all these confusing thoughts running thro my head... I'm jealous of my friend who is having a health bub in december... I'm jealous of my fb group I know I shouldn't be... But I am... Why me? Why this poor helpless baby? I'm jealous at the dad he dosnt understand, he said he will support my choice what ever it is and not to worry till the results of the placenta come back... But how am
I not to worry? Would this be classed as a baby already? What do I do after if I abort her? Where does she go? How will they do it? I'm so Friken confused!!!! I just wanna scream an cry and punch something.