+ Reply to Thread
Page 27 of 37 FirstFirst ... 172526272829 ... LastLast
Results 261 to 270 of 367
  1. #261
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    12,708
    Thanks
    9,558
    Thanked
    12,691
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week
    Too much deep thinking going on here.

    If you want to work outside the home, do it. If you don't, then don't.

    Whatever you do own your decision and be happy with it. If you're unhappy and feel pressure then that's on you ....don't blame someone/something else or use it to say we still need a strong feminist movement.

  2. #262
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    201
    Thanks
    165
    Thanked
    154
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Grebbeci View Post
    So I'm probably coming across as anti-all the feminist principles here, which I am not. Equality needs to be achieved and I still think it's a long way off. But I think we need to be careful in that it doesn't go too far the other way in that women feel like they are EXPECTED to return to the workforce after having kids.
    I think it does happen sometimes that SAHMs by choice are looked down upon. This is wrong, but this is not the true ethos of feminism, therefore women that do look down on SAHMs are not upholding the ethos of feminism. They are misusing it for their own agenda.

  3. #263
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    12,708
    Thanks
    9,558
    Thanked
    12,691
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by Bongley View Post
    But, where are the men in these debates? Its all about women choosing work or staying at home. The women have to choose, thats where a lot of guilt comes from.

    If my partner and I manage to have a second child then childcare costs will decimate one of our wages. Its great that I have a choice to work, be a SAHM or go part-time obviously but it would be even better if my partners workplace was more flexible about working part-time. Then we could share the load.
    As it is, I don't think my partner is even considering asking even though I have pointed this out to him. The choice (and guilt) will lay squarely on my shoulders but not his. If he had more more choice and flexibility and then so would I. I'd like to see more men take on childcare and part-time roles. For it to be more the norm.
    My bubba doesn't have full time daycare yet. Hubby and I are sharing the days off that we don't have daycare: this was his idea and he didnt hesitate to raise it with his employer.

    Not saying that the same would be possible with you but just offering some perspective that it's not all on the women's shoulders nowdays.

    Ps its a bummer when childcare costs erode the financial benefit of working.

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to VicPark For This Useful Post:

    saxonrose  (09-08-2012)

  5. #264
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    88
    Thanks
    54
    Thanked
    28
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Grebbeci View Post
    Of course I'm not saying that, I'm just trying to point out that it goes both ways. At the moment the women on here are saying that women are made to feel pressured to stay at home and be the primary carer of the children. I actually think at the moment women are at a crossroads.
    You go back to work and you end up feeling pressured that you should be at home with the kids, you stay at home with the kids you end up feeling pressured that you should be going back to work.
    But Grebecci this is the thing. Men aren't expected to stay home and no-one questions it. And if they do, we salute them. Why do we still question women's choices while men are never made to feel guilty about their choices?

  6. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Baracuda For This Useful Post:

    missie_mackxxxx  (10-08-2012),MissMuppet  (09-08-2012),saxonrose  (09-08-2012)

  7. #265
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    12,708
    Thanks
    9,558
    Thanked
    12,691
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by missie_mack View Post
    You are so spot on. Whilst women still bear the burden (for lack of a better term) of being the main carer for their children and doing housework based on census results it remains indirectly as womens work, particularly when the statistics don't change with working mothers proportion of caring and cleaning. We still have such a long way to go until it really is a choice
    In a galaxy far far away....
    Women doing the bulk of childcaring and housework can't be used to say we still have a long way to go before it really is a choice.

    Women can choose partners that aren't chauvinists. They can Choose partners that will help out their fair share. Women can choose to put their foot down and not be slaves.

    If a woman chooses to get herself in/stay in a relationship where she does the bulk of 'traditional' women's work, then that's her choice. It on her. But we can't then use it to say feminism has a long way to go.

    It's about time we empower women to improve their own situations ... to get some balls .... instead of expecting the feminism fairy to wave her magic wand and all of a sudden make 'it' happen.

  8. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to VicPark For This Useful Post:

    Grebbeci  (09-08-2012),Maybelline  (09-08-2012)

  9. #266
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    74
    Thanks
    16
    Thanked
    13
    Reviews
    0
    I read 25 or so pages of this thread and lost some steam on the last couple so I am sorry if what I am about to say has been covered already.

    Call me a feminist or not - I don't care. I believe in Womens RIGHTS. The difference here is that whilst I want equal pay for equal work, the right to vote, to drive, to own property etc I do not necessarily believe that EQUAL means FAIR.

    I do not want to be treated as though I am a man. I want to be treated fairly but on MY OWN TERMS. I want to be feminine. I like looking pretty and soft. I do not want to be made to lift heavy things- because a man would or can. I want to be able to breastfeed my children whilst working or stay home with them if I choose.

    I want to be allowed to play to my strengths as a WOMAN. I want my man to be able to play to his stregnths as a MAN. This is not because I think either is more than or less than but because I think both are equally amazing but different.

    Hopefully I am clear on what I mean. I think that feminism has done an amazing job of promoting womens rights and we owe the movement a lot. However it is often associated with being asked to be treated the same as Men. I personally do not want this. I want to be treated as a WOMAN. Just with equal respect and rights that a man would be afforded.
    Last edited by mummyRhi; 09-08-2012 at 14:07. Reason: spelling

  10. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to mummyRhi For This Useful Post:

    Grebbeci  (09-08-2012),saxonrose  (09-08-2012)

  11. #267
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    88
    Thanks
    54
    Thanked
    28
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Women doing the bulk of childcaring and housework can't be used to say we still have a long way to go before it really is a choice.

    Women can choose partners that aren't chauvinists. They can Choose partners that will help out their fair share. Women can choose to put their foot down and not be slaves.

    If a woman chooses to get herself in/stay in a relationship where she does the bulk of 'traditional' women's work, then that's her choice. It on her. But we can't then use it to say feminism has a long way to go.

    It's about time we empower women to improve their own situations ... to get some balls .... instead of expecting the feminism fairy to wave her magic wand and all of a sudden make 'it' happen.
    I agree with this 99% but would replace the word 'balls' with 'guts'

    Also, I often wonder why women still do it all and put up with it yet complain constantly about it - it's almost as if women fear rejection by men so we don't stand up for ourselves. Not all of us though, I'd rather be single any day than put up with a man who expected me to do all the housework.
    Last edited by Baracuda; 09-08-2012 at 14:10.

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to Baracuda For This Useful Post:

    VicPark  (09-08-2012)

  13. #268
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    4,765
    Thanks
    1,903
    Thanked
    2,790
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    It's about time we empower women to improve their own situations ... to get some balls .... instead of expecting the feminism fairy to wave her magic wand and all of a sudden make 'it' happen.
    But that is what feminism is all about! You said it exactly - empowering women to improve their own situations!

  14. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to shelle65 For This Useful Post:

    Atropos  (09-08-2012),beebs  (09-08-2012),delirium  (09-08-2012),elleandsam  (09-08-2012),Petulia  (09-08-2012),saxonrose  (09-08-2012)

  15. #269
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    88
    Thanks
    54
    Thanked
    28
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by mummyRhi View Post

    I do not want to be treated as though I am a man. I want to be treated fairly but on MY OWN TERMS. I want to be feminine. I like looking pretty and soft.
    Ive never heard a feminist say they want to be treated as though they're a man.... I think the 80's feminists have a lot to answer for, with the masculine dress code and those god awful big shoulder pads. It gave the wrong impression of feminism IMO

  16. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Baracuda For This Useful Post:

    beebs  (09-08-2012),share a book  (09-08-2012)

  17. #270
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    4,765
    Thanks
    1,903
    Thanked
    2,790
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Vicpark - you sound like you have a personality very similar to me.

    I don't take any sh*t from the people I work with. No one would dare say anything about the fact that I leave at 5.15 to pick DD up from school, or complain when I can't come in to work because DD is sick.

    I don't listen to anyone who might say I should be at home with my daughter and not at work. I would just laugh at them.

    BUT the thing is - not all women are like you and me. And why should they be? We are all different, we all have different personalities. Just like there are outgoing, demanding men and there are quiet, non-confrontational men.

    I fight the fight for those who can't yet fight for themselves. Not for me - I'm sorted. But there are so many who aren't.

  18. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to shelle65 For This Useful Post:

    Busy-Bee  (09-08-2012),delirium  (09-08-2012),missie_mackxxxx  (10-08-2012),Petulia  (09-08-2012),saxonrose  (09-08-2012),WorkingClassMum  (09-08-2012)


 

Similar Threads

  1. Do YOU think a woman can be a feminist and...
    By SassyMummy in forum General Chat
    Replies: 104
    Last Post: 01-02-2012, 11:05

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Boody Organic Bamboo Baby Wear
Softer than your bub's bum Boody Organic Bamboo Baby Wear
Australia's favourite eco brand has delivered a gorgeous baby collection. Made from organic bamboo, Boody's extraordinarily soft and stretchy, skin-friendly tops, bottoms, onesies, bibs and wraps don't 'cost the earth'. Get 20% OFF! Code BUBHUB16.
sales & new stuffsee all
CarmelsBeautySecrets
Growing your own natural nails is easy. Years ago, I devised a simple and very effective technique which really helps boosts the nails' growth in as little as three days! And most importantly keeps them that way.
featured supporter
Wendys Music School
Wendy’s Music School. Experience, Quality and great service! For qualifying students we will get you playing or singing your favourite music in 90 days GUARANTEED! Book a free assessment online now!
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!