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  1. #1
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    Default For those who have finished having babies and breastfeeding....

    Did you feel strange for awhile? Like you had to rediscover who you are...or something?

    I have just finished 12 years of being pregnant and feeding (9 years continuosly) and while some things have greatly imrpoved (ie. libido!) I just feel weird! For the first time I have no one else relying on my body for nutrition, etc. I supposed the change in hormones can make you feel weird too.

    Can anyone relate?

  2. #2
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    Yes and No.

    As you know I am still feeding ds3 but I have twice before got to that stage. I found it was a little strange. I do think you go through some major hormonal stuff. i also think there is a huge mental side to it as well. The last time was really hard for me but I also had the extra stress of having my op and all the hormonal and mental stuff that went with that. His last feed was just before they took me down to have most of my stomach removed.

    I am finding this time knowning that there won't be another after him is quite confronting.

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    Yes, that is full on

    I am excited that we are finished having babies now, from a 'looking forward to the next stage with the kids and DH' but I am finding it very scary too!

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    LoveLivesHere  (06-08-2012)

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    I've finished having bubs and facing the end of BFing my dd (she's now 10 months old and I know we'll last past 12 months, but I'll probably stop before she's 18 months old). I feel weird. It was such a big build up to TTCing #1 and then again for #2 and so much of our lives - jobs, savings, house layout, etc, etc was geared towards having our kids. Suddenly, we're done having kids and our big driving force for so much is gone.

    I spent a long time worrying/thinking about getting my health (and my dh's health) ready for pregnancy too - eating well, doing specific exercises, etc, etc. Suddenly that's not needed. I can see that it won't be too long til I have to worry about foods I eat when I stop BFing (eg. only 1 piece a flake a fortnight, various medications, etc). I know that it will feel extra weird ... and yet be a big relief.

    So, yes, I think it takes a while to adjust to the 'new you' and it's easy to feel a little lost. Take the time to reflect on what you want now and set yourself some medium - long term goals to help you focus on the new reality.

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    Thanks for sharing Mim.

    I have never had to exclude foods while breastfeeding but I guess I did lookk after myself for their sake. I am finding it hard to look after myself now I guess as that driving force as you say, has been removed.

    Ah, it's a weird time of life!

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    Yes. You and I have kids of similar ages. Mine are 12, 10, 7, 5 and 2. And I'm finished breastfeeding and having babies and while I do miss that wonderful excitement of finding out you're pregnant and the wonder of a newborn, I am more than happy to move on to the next stage. 2yo is yelling at me, I'll try and come back later.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Clarabelle View Post
    Yes. You and I have kids of similar ages. Mine are 12, 10, 7, 5 and 2. And I'm finished breastfeeding and having babies and while I do miss that wonderful excitement of finding out you're pregnant and the wonder of a newborn, I am more than happy to move on to the next stage. 2yo is yelling at me, I'll try and come back later.
    It's funny. I have NO desire to HAVE another baby, none.at.all. Definitely feel finished and ready for the next stage....and I feel excited. It's just that now I am here, I have realised I don't know myself as that has been my focus for so long.

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    As you know I don't have children yet, but I already worry about this (...yeah I overthink everything!)
    It's like the whole focus of my 20's will be meeting the right man, TTC, being pregnant, having babies, and there'll be so many new, exciting experiences that my life will pretty much revolve around. But then that stage will pass and I don't know what there'll be to look forward to after that.
    I'm sure I'll enjoy seeing the children grow up, but that's a bit stressful too - I'm so scared of teenagers! lol

    So I obviously have no helpful advice, I just imagine it would be pretty tough to be in your position right now and have to readjust

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    Quote Originally Posted by Baburun View Post
    As you know I don't have children yet, but I already worry about this (...yeah I overthink everything!)
    It's like the whole focus of my 20's will be meeting the right man, TTC, being pregnant, having babies, and there'll be so many new, exciting experiences that my life will pretty much revolve around. But then that stage will pass and I don't know what there'll be to look forward to after that.
    I'm sure I'll enjoy seeing the children grow up, but that's a bit stressful too - I'm so scared of teenagers! lol

    So I obviously have no helpful advice, I just imagine it would be pretty tough to be in your position right now and have to readjust
    Thanks, I think it is great you are already thinking about it! Very insightful. I didn't for obvious reasons so now I am ready (I think) to discover who I am.

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    I'm finished with babies and will very soon be fiinished breastfeeding. It did take me a little while to discover who I am, but I knew I couldn't in good faith tell my daughter she can do anything she put her mind to or that she can be a success if I didn't show her what that meant. So now I'm studying, working on my own business and I'm about to join the Army Reserves all while training to run my own marathon, and taking care of the kids full time.

    Some people say life is about balance, screw balance, I'm living my life to the absolute fullest.


 

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