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  1. #1
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    Default frustration:a child causing injury to my son's eye and irresponsible guardian

    Hello, I just wanted to get this out of my system a bit. I am feeling so frustrated and angry.

    This morning I took my son to the outdoor playground area of a McDonald at Cumberland Park (SA). A boy kicked my son because he just didn't want anyone to come into the "helicopter". He had been annoying other children so I had gone up to the helicopter to see what was happening and told him not to attack other children. He was a rare soul, couldn't care less, no apology, a typical devil you wouldn't dream encountering. My son is never a hitter and he isn't used to violence.

    My son was screaming and crying, and the instant he said somebody hurt his eye, I panicked and checked if he could see with that eye. He could, but
    as soon as I discovered that my son's eye had a bloody spot (blood clot?), I went to the woman who was with the culprit child but she wasn't his mother, she said. I requested the child's parents contact as the injury could be serious. She gave me her mobile number but she never showed any consideration for my son's condition. She couldn't care less.

    Anyway I took my son to his GP and he said he was very lucky that, although it looks bad, the actual damage seems minimal and superficial. I was so relieved to hear that. I knew my son still could see, but I wouldn't know if there is any damage internally as well.

    When I was at McDonald I didn't have my mobile as I had left it at home, so I sent an SMS to this caretaker to ask for the boy's parents info, once again several hours later, but no reply.

    I am really weak at confronting so I wanted to avoid a phone conversation to her, as she seemed very superficial and inconsiderate. But now she is ignoring my texts, she obviously doesn't take me seriously.

    I believe and hope that my son's eye will completely recover, but if there would be any aftereffect, I think they need to know. I was so stupid not to demand the parent's info right there at McDonald.

    All I have is the mobile number of a woman who couldn't care less and I am not even sure it is her number.

    I am feeling so upset and hurt that she seems so heartless. I am not blaming the said child as some children do hurt others and need supervision and guidance. I am just appalled by his adult company.

    I'd love to hunt down this boy and tell his parents that he could have caused a permanent damage to another child's eye.

    At the same time, I feel sorry for this child, Will, that he is not cared for by someone who is mature and considerate, who does not guide him for good social behaviour. If the same thing happens to him, she wouldn't have taken much notice either. She wouldn't stand up to defend the child. Probably she has not had her own child but even then she doesn't seem to have any maternal potential. I just want to scream at her but can't call her as it's 3:51 am.

    Are there anyone here whose children suffered injury inflicted by other children? What can I do? Suffer in silence? I assume it's not a police matter but to me this woman is a moral criminal.

    I'm trying to come to in terms with this incident. I appreciate any suggestion, your stories, how to deal with this type of pain and frustration...

    Today is my son's 5th birthday, I am hoping to make this day as cheerful as possible.

    thank you

  2. #2
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    I'm sorry that happened to your son - it must have been very worrying.

    However, I don't believe that you need to follow it up anymore with the other child's mother. If it had happened to my child, I would have written it off as an unfortunate incident and sought medical attention for my child if it was required (as you did).

    In Australia all medical attention is free of charge (and you can find bulk-billing GPs), so you are unlikely to be out of pocket for his medical expenses. I think claiming for "pain and suffering" etc is going a bit too far, and if you take out that, you really shouldn't be claiming for much money at all.

    I hope you don't feel I'm dismissing what has happened. My child has been kicked (yes, kicked) from the top level of a playground by a mentally impaired 10 year old at the park. It was devastating for me as a mother...but these things happen at a park, and it really is an unfortunate accident.

    Hugs

  3. #3
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    My advise. Stay away from maccas playgrounds! If u look at my posts u will see I posted something similar a few weeks back. It makes u feel sick.. Angry and upset when kids her your beautiful boy and u know they are gentle! And it makes it worse when the parents dont care! Learn to stick up for yourself and tell those parents straight out at those playgrounds.. Maybe the embarassment will do something! I feel for u I truely do xx

    Sent from my GT-I9000 using BubHub

  4. #4
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    Default thank you

    Hi thank you for your comments. Just knowing someone could sympathize with my situation is comforting.

    littlegreengeisha, I'll be more watchful now on. We hardly ever go to McDonald to eat but my son loves the outdoor play area of fast food outlets. At that time we had to kill some time for the bus so went... My son is an only child and I'm a single mum so he really enjoys playing in the presence of other children. I will think twice next time.

    Mysurprisebaby, thank you for your advice, too. No, I won't chase after parents just for pushing and shoving, but I was just worried (as I tend to) if there would be any permanent damage and if I need to pursue something legal, I should at least have their contact info. I am still new to Australia so am not sure with the law, but just wanted to cover the basis.

    Very fortunately, my son seems pain free and still can see as before. I really am trying to think for the better but I am concerned, what if the physical trauma of the moment can affect at a later stage. Can a vision deteriorate if there is internal damage that a GP couldn't see? That sort of thing...

    I actually gathered up all my courage and called this woman but it went straight to a voice mail. I am not even sure she gave me a correct number, really, but the recorded voice wasn't of the woman I spoke to at McDonald (she seemed under or around 30), sounded a lot more aged, of over 50. If the number was of the older lady there who could be the boy's grandmother, then she may not know how to use text function...

    I want to forget about this and move on, I trust my son's eye will heal soon. I just need to wipe off any worrying thinking.

    Thank you both again for listening. Today we'll have my son's 5th birthday party so I have to get ready

  5. #5
    Bonkers is offline wishes she was a glow worm. A glow worm's never glum, 'cos how can you be grumpy when the sun shines out of your bum?
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    If it bothers you that much maybe contact McDonald's and get the security footage. But you might only be able to do that If their is lasting damage. And maybe just seek out a lawyer and ask for their advice if your still not happy. I hope your little one is ok

  6. #6
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    bambino is offline Autistic Today, My Genius Tomorrow
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    I am sorry to hear about this.

    But......IMO.....they're kids. Really. And it happens. More often than not.
    We have been on both sides, my son being the aggressor and also the receiver.
    Yes, it's terrible, and it makes you feel angry and sad and all of those things. But it happens. Especially at parks or play centers where there is only so much play equipment and they all want a turn at the same time.

    But as a responsible parent (well I hope I am), I confronted the situation head on in the instance that it happened. Whether it was to discipline my son for his wrong doings, or have a chat with the child or the parent involved in the incident.
    Most parents are understanding......but then like you said, there are the few that don't really give a hoot, and that is sad.

    I'm sorry you feel the way you do, and sad for your sons injury.

    I hope your son feels better real soon and has a lovely birthday.

  7. #7
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    I understand your dismay at your child being hurt.

    What do you really hope to gain from hunting down the Parents? Do you just want the satisfaction of the kid being told off, do you want the woman career to be told off? Does this child have parents? Is he in foster care? Was he is respite care? Are his parents or career going to take an AVO out against you for harrasement and stalking?

    Your child is going to be hurt again several times through his life by accidents like this. The other child struck out but he didn't mean to hurt your child he just wanted his own space. This type of behavior can be seen from the most gentle of children in the playground at school, corner parks and McDonalds every day. I don't agree with the other child striking out, but sometime kids (and adults) do this.

    I understand it came as shock that your child was hurt. But you are not going to get the satisfaction and retribution that you seek. You are going to make yourself sick by pouring all your energy into what has turned out to be a very minor incident.

    I don't understand why this would negatively impact on his birthday party. you dont need to 'make it as cheerful', just relax and enjoy the day. I hope he gets throughly spoilt and has a wonderful day. I hope you can relax and enjoy his day with him.
    Last edited by WorkingClassMum; 04-08-2012 at 10:04. Reason: My autocorrect hates me

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    Children get involved in argy bargey ... That's what they do ... If you don't want things like this to happen don't go to playgrounds OR you watch your child like a Hawke.

    Ringing the other parent is totally ott.

    As a parent if MY child injure another child they are told off and timed out wherever we are; if MY child is injured I would expect the same but you can't control other parents BUT you can control where your children are.

    We regularly attend play centers ... Along the way we have had bumped heads, punches, bites ... I have told other peoples children off (but only if I have seen something going on In the equipment I haven't liked and a few stern words will put a stop to it before it gets to become an issue). I have also left playgrounds when the play has been inappropriate.

  9. #9
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    I probably would have said something to the child myself and left it at that. I don't think constant phone calls (when it is established that it is a minor incident) will achieve anything and will probably cause more stress for you than need be.

    Unfortunately these things happen in playgrounds... More often than not

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by WorkingClassMum View Post
    I understand your dismay at your child being hurt.

    What do you really hope to gain from hunting down the Parents? Do you just want the satisfaction of the kid being told off, do you want the woman career to be told off? Does this child have parents? Is he in foster care? Was he is respite care? Are his parents or career going to take an AVO out against you for harrasement and stalking?

    Your child is going to be hurt again several times through his life by accidents like this. The other child struck out but he didn't mean to hurt your child he wanted his own space. This type of behavior can be seen from the most gentle of children in the playground at school,cornerbacks andmcdonalds every day. I don't agree with the. Other child striking out, but sometime kids (and adults) do this.

    I understand it came as shock that your child was hurt. But you are not going to get the satisfaction and retribution that you seek. You are going to make yourself sick by pouring all your energy into what has turned out to be a very minor incident.

    I don't understand why this would negatively impact on his birthday party. you dont need to 'make it as cheery',just relax and enjoy the day. I hope he gets throughout spoit and has a wonderful day. I hope you can relax and enjoy his day with him.
    All of this. Accidents happen.
    Last edited by Mod-biscotti; 04-08-2012 at 13:31. Reason: Not necessary


 

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