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  1. #211
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    Default Re: How would you react if your daughter were 18 & Preg?

    Quote Originally Posted by HarvestMoon View Post
    Or stop her from claiming welfare if that's what she wants.

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    Yes, that too, which I'm reading many people saying. You can encourage and guide her to do something but it isn't the final answer. Your responsibilities as a parent decrease significantly when your daughter comes home pregnant or turns 18
    Last edited by atomicmama; 07-02-2013 at 18:53.

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    Default How would you react if your daughter were 18 & Preg?

    A whole lot more than my mother did for me when I fell at 20. I would offer free accommodation, babysitting and childcare if I was able. I would be by her side as much as she'd allow, and encourage her to study/further her career.

  4. #213
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    Quote Originally Posted by redlipsandpearls View Post
    Wow, you can't make your daughter give HER child up for adoption.
    Quote Originally Posted by HarvestMoon View Post
    Or stop her from claiming welfare if that's what she wants.

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    Quote Originally Posted by redlipsandpearls View Post
    Yes, that too, which I'm reading many people saying. You can encourage and guide her to do something but it isn't the final answer. Your responsibilities as a parent decrease significantly when your daughter comes home pregnant or turns 18
    Well no I cant make her but if she cant raise a child on her own then what are her other options? If she had an abortion I dont think I could ever forgive her. I really dont. I am not going to financially support another child, and she is against welfare too so if she really needed it then I am sure she would get on to get on her feet but I would hope she sticks to her beliefs that its not an option long term.

  5. #214
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    Default Re: How would you react if your daughter were 18 & Preg?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    Well no I cant make her but if she cant raise a child on her own then what are her other options? If she had an abortion I dont think I could ever forgive her. I really dont. I am not going to financially support another child, and she is against welfare too so if she really needed it then I am sure she would get on to get on her feet but I would hope she sticks to her beliefs that its not an option long term.
    I think you would find a social worker would step in and offer support services which may open her eyes to views other than yours.

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  7. #215
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    Default How would you react if your daughter were 18 & Preg?

    I WAS 18 and pregnant. With my first so I know that whilst she needed support I would be furious at myself for leading her to follow my footsteps!

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    Default How would you react if your daughter were 18 & Preg?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    I would be upset honestly because I have told her time and time again to not do what I did and have children at 18. She has so much she can do and live life travel, finish school etc and a baby makes that much more difficult. I have told her that welfare isnt an option that she would then have to get a job and not be able to do all the fun things she could have without a child. I also let her know that there is no option for forced child support that the father can walk off and she would have to do it on her own and she agrees that forcing child support is not ok and knows what she would have to do to avoid that. I also told her that even if she hates the guy she could very well be stuck dealing with him for 18 years if he wants to be involved in the child life. Thank god she doesnt want kids into late 20s hope it stays that way.

    I also would support her and love her and make sure she had what she needed for the baby of course but I would be very disappointed because I hope she will learn from my mistakes, and how hard it was for me to get to where I am with children.

    If she was under 18 it would go up for adoption if she couldnt support it herself with the above statements. We dont believe in abortions so that is where adoption came up.
    Fair enough you'd be upset, but at 18 she is legally an adult. She can claim single parent payments (we don't have "welfare") without your permission. And child support payments are for the *child* and the father has a responsibility to pay them, legally (and morally IMO). Also, not claiming child support may affect any other payments she was entitled to.
    Even under the age of 18 you cannot force a child to adopt out their own baby! You'd make her adopt if she couldn't support it but wouldn't let her claim parenting payments or child support?? Wow. What an awful choice for a young person to be handed.

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  10. #217
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    Default How would you react if your daughter were 18 & Preg?

    What happens if your daughter was 18/19/20 and was purposely pregnant (ie. TTC)? Would you still feel so disappointed? Or is t just unplanned pregnancies that ppl are against?

  11. #218
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    Default How would you react if your daughter were 18 & Preg?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    Well no I cant make her but if she cant raise a child on her own then what are her other options? If she had an abortion I dont think I could ever forgive her. I really dont. I am not going to financially support another child, and she is against welfare too so if she really needed it then I am sure she would get on to get on her feet but I would hope she sticks to her beliefs that its not an option long term.
    Not going to financially support another child? Your own grandchild? Wow again.
    You would never forgive her for aborting, yet you'd make keeping the baby near impossible. That's pretty rough LMF.

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  13. #219
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    Default How would you react if your daughter were 18 & Preg?

    I was pregnant at 18 and basically abandoned by everyone I knew, so if my daughter ended up pregnant at 18 I'd support her, I'd help her in any way I could, for as long as I lived, not just the newborn stage when everyone wants cuddles.
    Last edited by ~BEXTER~; 07-02-2013 at 19:46.

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  15. #220
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    Default How would you react if your daughter were 18 & Preg?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mum2EandR View Post
    What happens if your daughter was 18/19/20 and was purposely pregnant (ie. TTC)? Would you still feel so disappointed? Or is t just unplanned pregnancies that ppl are against?
    I got pregnant at 20, on purpose. My parents weren't hugely impressed but they got past it. They knew it was what I wanted, even if it didn't fit with what they wanted for me.

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