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  1. #101
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    Quote Originally Posted by London View Post
    Funnily enough, the OP didnt state that the 18yr old NEEDS help. People are instantly assuming that the 18yr old is some poor, helpless, uneducated CHILD who is telling her parents and basically asking for help.
    People are saying 'Im sorry, I wont pay for her after this point" ....where in the OP does it say the 18yr old is asking for financial support?
    Yep the Op is actually pregnant and in a long term, stable, financially secure relationship i think she said it a couple of pages in.

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  3. #102
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    I know what it is to be 18 and pregnant so I would be a bit sad for my daughter because I want more for her than to go straight from child to mother with no time to know herself as a woman in between.

    I would support her though, of course.

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  5. #103
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    I'll be supporting my DD no matter what she decides to do with her life.

    I was 21 when I had her, yes I'd finished high school and had a decent paying job but it was by no means a career.

    It's taken me until 30 to realise just what I want to do with my life and put things in place to make that possible so I would not care what age she decided to be a mum, if that's what she honestly wanted she would have me here to help in every way I could!

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  7. #104
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    Quote Originally Posted by London View Post
    Funnily enough, the OP didnt state that the 18yr old NEEDS help. People are instantly assuming that the 18yr old is some poor, helpless, uneducated CHILD who is telling her parents and basically asking for help.
    People are saying 'Im sorry, I wont pay for her after this point" ....where in the OP does it say the 18yr old is asking for financial support?
    Exactly this ^ I stated before I have been with DP for three years we own a house together and our cars, I have many different qualifications and have a job.


    However, I did ask how they would react if their daughter told them she was pregnant at this age soo I'm supporting their opinions as well with an open mind

  8. #105
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    Quote Originally Posted by Refresh View Post
    Yep the Op is actually pregnant and in a long term, stable, financially secure relationship i think she said it a couple of pages in.
    Yes, I saw that Thats why Im saying 'funnily enough' ....because everyone assumed the worst about the 18yr old.

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  10. #106
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    Just wanted to say Thankyou guys! I now know or may har a glimpse inside y mothers mind you guys are great support !

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  12. #107
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    *Have* *my*

  13. #108
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    There is a big difference between being a SAHM/on welfare and being on welfare while studying and being a mum.

    You're right, SAHM's are enriching their kids lives. But they are not increasing their earning potential/ ability to pull their family out of poverty (if that is the case)/ability to contribute financially to
    Society via paying tax.
    But why can't that wait until their child is at school? After all, they will only be 23 then - still plenty of time to study/sort out career.

    With the new rules regarding parenting payments, when the child turns 6 you are either cut off welfare, or if you're single, required to work or study part time. So "sitting on welfare" whilst doing nothing isn't really an option anyway past that age.

    On a side note - why is okay for a mother to stay at home to raise her children, without any pressure to study, contribute to society or "better" herself, if she has a partner bringing in income, yet it's not okay if she has to rely on welfare to do so? I find that incredibly unfair. Why should that be a privilege restricted only to those who are lucky enough to have supportive partners?

    That said, personally I decided to study whilst DS was young, and I'm glad I did. I do wish I had started uni straight after finishing yr 12, as I would have been in my final year now. But to me, being there for my son before he started school was more important. There's always time to further my education, whereas children are only young once! Yes it meant a few more years on welfare, but that's a small sacrifice in the long run.

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  15. #109
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    Just remember, your parents have a right to react the way they do...and you have the right to react to their reaction Lol They might flip out completely....but you can choose how to act to that reaction. My mum wasnt soo good when I told her the news but she now admits to loving my son more than she loves me....mole
    By the way, I havent said it yet....Congrats!

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  17. #110
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    Quote Originally Posted by ~ElectricPink~ View Post
    But why can't that wait until their child is at school? After all, they will only be 23 then - still plenty of time to study/sort out career.

    With the new rules regarding parenting payments, when the child turns 6 you are either cut off welfare, or if you're single, required to work or study part time. So "sitting on welfare" whilst doing nothing isn't really an option anyway past that age.

    On a side note - why is okay for a mother to stay at home to raise her children, without any pressure to study, contribute to society or "better" herself, if she has a partner bringing in income, yet it's not okay if she has to rely on welfare to do so? I find that incredibly unfair. Why should that be a privilege restricted only to those who are lucky enough to have supportive partners?

    That said, personally I decided to study whilst DS was young, and I'm glad I did. I do wish I had started uni straight after finishing yr 12, as I would have been in my final year now. But to me, being there for my son before he started school was more important. There's always time to further my education, whereas children are only young once! Yes it meant a few more years on welfare, but that's a small sacrifice in the long run.
    Agree totally.

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