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  1. #81
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    Quote Originally Posted by BlissedOut View Post
    I will reiterate, I never called anyone a 'part-time parent'. I never said childcare was bad, I never said having a facility contribute to the raising of your kids is a bad thing either.

    Like I believe breast milk is the optimal source of nutrition, natural birthing is generally the optimal method of birth, I also believe being in your parents presence full time is optimal. People shouldn't get offended by the first two and shouldn't get offended by the last.

    I think child care is great and is beneficial, so please don't paint my posts as something they aren't.
    I believe you are being deliberately provocative in a section where working parents go to for support - this is not a place for parents to hear that putting their child into child care is not 'optimal'.

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  3. #82
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    I think the concern is that people will take the message from the article is that "childcare is fine. it doesn't affect kids" and that will affect people's choices.

    It is unfortunate that some people don't have a choice, but the effect on the children is the same whether the parents have to use daycare or choose to use daycare.

    I firmly believe that childcare for very young children can potentially damage them emotionally as they should have attachment to primary carers, and that their needs are not met adequately due to the ratios.

    But surely you can do something, and admit that it's probably not optimal, however when balanced against the other options is the best choice.

    I put my son in daycare 3 days a week from when he was 3 months old, and he is now almost 4. I am due again soon and will put this baby in twice a week from when he is 5 or 6 months old. I understand the guilt, the tears, the internal wrangling. He was even kicked out of family daycare due to behavioural issues. But I can also rationalise that we had to make a decision for the whole family, and that living in poverty off my partner's wage (or when he didn't work due to full time study) was not the best decision for our family. Likewise, I also think it's important for women to keep their skills and not be reliant on a man for any long period. I don't know; the whole thing is a big balancing act, but surely as working women we don't just blindly want to be told that daycare is fine just because it may be necessary.

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  5. #83
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRedV View Post
    But you obviously thought there was a possibility of some benefits to your child by putting him in in the first place.
    I know that was not for me, but dd was in care entirely for me to work, not because there was any benefit for her. It would have been good if she did benefit from it but she was harmed by it instead.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BlissedOut View Post

    Raising your child full time means being with providing full time care to your child yourself.
    So am I only a part time parent?

    What hours do I 'clock' off being a parent?

    Does that mean parents of kindy & school aged kids are not full time parents?

    If my child gets babysat am I suddenly not a parent for a few hours?

    Maybe I cease being a parent once my kids are adults?

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    Cheers to the illiterate amongst us.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MsMummy View Post
    I think the concern is that people will take the message from the article is that "childcare is fine. it doesn't affect kids" and that will affect people's choices.
    Does the opposite not ring true? That saying childcare is akin to abuse will also affect peoples choices and further hurt people who feel they don't have a choice?

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    Quote Originally Posted by BlissedOut View Post
    Any childcare centre won't nurture my kids like I do, nor will it provide them with the secure attachment I believe they need.

    I definitely see the benefits of child care for children, but I feel they don't outweigh the benefits of having their parents raise them full time.
    Thats cool, this is your personal value for your family. I disagree. I dont beleive your children are more nurtured or cared for than any other child whose parents put them in childcare.

    I think considering this was posted in the working parents section, where parents are meant to be supportive of being in a similar situation, its in pretty poor taste that so many have felt the need to make a debate out of an article which states that childcare isn't harmful for children ON THE WHOLE.. not every single child.. but most children, yes, they are fine. There have been many studies on this issue which have found very little difference between children who spend time at daycare and children who dont. There have been small differences and advantages and disadvantages for each group. I remember reading one study which said children who had never been to daycare had higher IQs, but children who went to daycare had better social skills.. Im sure that doesn't apply to every single child who has attended childcare or stayed at home though. Im sure there are children who have never been to daycare who are extremely sociable, and children who went to daycare from an early age who have very high IQs. .

    I post sometimes in the stay at home mum section, but its always supportive, never derogatory. I am offended that people have posted in here to be argumentative. Its not even worth debating anyway. Lots of children go to daycare. Most of them will be completely fine and unaffected by their experience.

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  14. #88
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    Default Re: Kids couldn't care less about going to child-care

    Yikes. I haven't replied so far because i have been at work, while my son was in care. Funnily enough. Let me be quite clear on my stance. Child care is fantastic and hugely beneficial for some children. It is detrimental to some children. I don't agree that all (maybe even most) kids get optimal care at home with a parent. I find it incredible that so many people dismiss the professionalism of early childhood educators. Sorry, you may know your child better than anyone, but these people have a diploma or a degree. Maybe you are better qualified to give them the best start developmentally, maybe not. On the other side, blanket statements like 'childcare is not harmful to children' are far too generalised. There's plenty of anecdotal evidence right here in this thread to suggest otherwise.
    Finally, and as a bit of an aside, it would be interesting to see how the changes in ratios and qualifications rolled out this year will change the quality in child care. I believe we should have affordable care available that truly suits and benefits ALL children, and despite what this article says, I don't even think we're even half way there yet.

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    Quote Originally Posted by CazHazKidz View Post
    Yeah, as I said in my last post, my wording was wrong. I don't really get they'd have to go at 4 weeks personally, Centrelink pays the bills within that time, but none the less if they had to do it then they had to do it. I certainly feel sorry for them as well. I couldn't imagine having to be away from baby at that age
    I am not a working mother so probably shouldn't be in this thread but you do realise that centrelink doesn't pay enough to cover everyone's bills yeah?

    One of the most amazing, kind, gentle, loving, nurturing women I know was in daycare from 7am-6pm Mon to Sat from when she was only a few weeks old. Now it's not something she chose to do with her children but she was extremely close to her mother and given her beautiful, kind and loving personality I'm guessing her mother did a lot of good there too.

    I don't imagine any mother takes the decision to put their 6 week old in to child care lightly. Culturally speaking, it is very common in the USA for babies to go in to child care from 6 weeks of age.

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    Quote Originally Posted by WorkingClassMum View Post
    Does the opposite not ring true? That saying childcare is akin to abuse will also affect peoples choices and further hurt people who feel they don't have a choice?
    I think it's a stretch for anybody to suggest that childcare is akin to abuse, but I'm sure it's been said on this forum before, although I haven't noticed it in this thread. Nobody should throw around the term "abuse" to describe childcare, as it's plainly not correct.

    I just don't think it's beneficial for children to say "childcare is fine" or "childcare is just as good as parental care" (assuming the parents provide adequate care of course)just to soothe the parents' guilt. I treat this argument the same way as I treat the "formula is just as good for babies as breastmilk" argument.

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