+ Reply to Thread
Page 7 of 10 FirstFirst ... 56789 ... LastLast
Results 61 to 70 of 96
  1. #61
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    19,776
    Thanks
    5,212
    Thanked
    7,063
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    Or there was this one time where there was someone on here talking about how doing certain things was bad parenting, and it came to light that she didn't even have one child.

    It is like - I see people with 5 kids and I am like - "heck, I seriously can hardly get my stuff together with 4, how the heck do they do that"?
    Oh yes if the response is insulting absolutely I would think and say sorry but I don't think you can understand if you haven't experienced it.

    If somebody is coming online for some help who has 6 children and somebody with two children has found a solution that HAS worked for her two, I don't see the harm if it's offering constructive advice.

    Admittedly, my mum said it was much easier with two than just me - because I was a massive pain in the bum and my brother came along and gave me someone to play with and stopped pestering her 24/7.

    I feel the same way when I hear that people have 4,5,6,7+ children and I think I'd end up in a mad house - seriously. I would. not. cope. Hence the IUD I had for many years lol. But I'm sure there are some out there with several children who ace it! Prob you too beebs

  2. #62
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    10,012
    Thanks
    14,124
    Thanked
    7,612
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    See, I don't agree with this. Saying to someone who doesn't have x amount of kids or doesn't have twins "you don't have x amount of kids, or you don't have twins" is not a put down. It is the truth.

    I struggled most with my first when I had one child - that was the hardest part of parenting for me personally.

    I don't feel offended when HOM mums say twin mums don't know what it is like - because I have no idea what it must be like. If someone with 8 kids said to me, "you don't know what it is like" I would be like "yes, exactly" (and I don't particularly what to know either!)


    Quote Originally Posted by 4underfour View Post
    I agree. I think it's extremely rude to tell someone they have no idea what it's like to .... Have twins, have over 2 kids etc etc. It makes them feel like they shouldn't be able to complain or feel overwhelmed about their lives.

  3. #63
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    19,600
    Thanks
    3,256
    Thanked
    4,044
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    Look, I get that it is probably pretty frustrating to hear, but if someone chose to have more than one baby - that isn't the issue here, the issue is that you don't know what it is like to have more than one, whereas most people with more kids do know what it is like to have one (unless they had twins or more first up).
    It isn't insulting -it is the truth. I don't understand why you would feel that is a bad thing?

    Just like I don't know what it is like to have 5, or to have triplets.
    It's depends on how it's put. A "friend" (not any more) used to go on and on about how I had no idea how hard her life was. Nothing I could possibly be going through could compare to having two children. I have two kids now and stand by discontinuing that friendship.

    Though I have sighed and bite my tongue when another friend (with no kids) told me two children is easier than one because they entertain each other. Lol. Umm.... yeah.... though I've stopped discouraging her from having children. I'm just going to be there for her when the reality slaps her on the face.

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using BubHub

  4. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Boobycino For This Useful Post:

    beebs  (19-07-2012),Benji  (19-07-2012)

  5. #64
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    10,012
    Thanks
    14,124
    Thanked
    7,612
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Of course if it is constructive advice - I will take advice from anyone, even if they have no kids and a pet puppy!
    It's the ones who go "oh come on, it isn't that hard to do blah, blah, blah" and they have one or two kids. It makes me fume.

    Ohh trust me, I am struggling with 4. 3 for me was fine, I was able to deal with that quite well - but this last one. Wouldn't change it for the world of course, but I am finding it difficult!

    Quote Originally Posted by Benji View Post
    If somebody is coming online for some help who has 6 children and somebody with two children has found a solution that HAS worked for her two, I don't see the harm if it's offering constructive advice.

    But I'm sure there are some out there with several children who ace it! Prob you too beebs

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to beebs For This Useful Post:

    Boobycino  (19-07-2012)

  7. #65
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    19,776
    Thanks
    5,212
    Thanked
    7,063
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    I have to say I'd be more likely to take advice from a professional of some capacity - child care worker, teacher, child psychologist - than the average parent. Whether they have children or not. I don't think "you have no idea how to deal with this because you haven't experienced it" is always applicable.

    And yes, booby, some of my friendships went down the toilet during pregnancy with the "just you wait until...."

  8. #66
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    10,012
    Thanks
    14,124
    Thanked
    7,612
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    I dunno, do you know they aren't even allowed to use the world "no" in childcare. I just find that so bizarre. No is a word, it is not even an offensive word. The world has gone insane.

    I would always follow up advice with my own research -like I wouldn't come on to a forum and read stuff about vaccinating and do whatever was being said. You know?

    Quote Originally Posted by Benji View Post
    I have to say I'd be more likely to take advice from a professional of some capacity - child care worker, teacher, child psychologist - than the average parent. Whether they have children or not. I don't think "you have no idea how to deal with this because you haven't experienced it" is always applicable.

    And yes, booby, some of my friendships went down the toilet during pregnancy with the "just you wait until...."

  9. #67
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    490
    Thanks
    90
    Thanked
    244
    Reviews
    0
    Oh constructive advice from anyone is great! I don't care if they have kids or not! However my oldest daughter's school teacher (and mother of one) who made out like I was a bad mother because I couldn't find 30 minutes of quiet time after school to help my daughter become 'advanced' at her school work (she is not falling behind and meets all expectations)...yeah in my head my thoughts were 'you have no idea.' Apparently my 3 and 1 year old were supposed to amuse themselves quietly in another room, with no adult supervising them (because I am on my own every afternoon and night) and she couldn't understand why that wasn't possible. Really lady? Her teacher who had 2 children told me that she didn't know how I was supposed to manage that and to maybe just set 30 minutes aside on a weekend to spend with my oldest when there was someone else around to entertain the younger two.

  10. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Wastingtime For This Useful Post:

    beebs  (19-07-2012),Benji  (19-07-2012)

  11. #68
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    19,600
    Thanks
    3,256
    Thanked
    4,044
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Benji View Post
    I have to say I'd be more likely to take advice from a professional of some capacity - child care worker, teacher, child psychologist - than the average parent. Whether they have children or not. I don't think "you have no idea how to deal with this because you haven't experienced it" is always applicable.

    And yes, booby, some of my friendships went down the toilet during pregnancy with the "just you wait until...."
    Sooo many times I've wanted to say "just you wait" lol. But then I remember the dumb **** I said before I had jasper. I'll just wait... so I can say when she has a 3 month old "remember when jasper was 3 months old and you chucked a hissy because I wouldn't take jasper 2 hours each way on 3 different modes of public transport there AND then back through the city at night to come to your 21st.... I'll take my apology now. "

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using BubHub

  12. The Following User Says Thank You to Boobycino For This Useful Post:

    Benji  (19-07-2012)

  13. #69
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    19,776
    Thanks
    5,212
    Thanked
    7,063
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    I dunno, do you know they aren't even allowed to use the world "no" in childcare. I just find that so bizarre. No is a word, it is not even an offensive word. The world has gone insane.

    I would always follow up advice with my own research -like I wouldn't come on to a forum and read stuff about vaccinating and do whatever was being said. You know?
    Really??!! My DS was told no quite frequently in child care He was even told one day when I picked him up "you're good boy. You not bad boy, you good boy". I thought how un-PC but how awesome lol. He was hanging out with a rough boy there. Fun times!

    I tend to do my own research on stuff, although hard because I don't always have the resources (at work - can't get to library etc)

  14. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Benji For This Useful Post:

    beebs  (19-07-2012),Boobycino  (19-07-2012)

  15. #70
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    490
    Thanks
    90
    Thanked
    244
    Reviews
    0
    Quote Originally Posted by Boobycino View Post

    Though I have sighed and bite my tongue when another friend (with no kids) told me two children is easier than one because they entertain each other. Lol.

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using BubHub
    Oh see I totally agree with this! You have to wait until the younger one is old enough to play but I do think it is easier...there's more work load yes, but if your children get along (mine do) then it's like permanent play mate!

  16. The Following User Says Thank You to Wastingtime For This Useful Post:

    Boobycino  (19-07-2012)


 

Similar Threads

  1. Help me understand the CCR!
    By Eko in forum Family Finances
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 17-07-2012, 18:49
  2. Ftb don't understand
    By boogasmumma2011 in forum Family Finances
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 17-07-2012, 09:21
  3. Stepping out of that closet
    By fichicken in forum General Chat
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 06-03-2012, 16:01

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Springfree Trampoline
Give the Ultimate Christmas Gift Springfree Trampoline
The World's Safest Trampoline™ is now also the world's first Smart Trampoline™. Sensors on the mat detect your every move and your jumps control fun, educational and active games on tablet. Secure the Ultimate Christmas Gift today!
sales & new stuffsee all
True Fairies
True Fairies is the first interactive website where children can engage and speak with a real fairy through the unique webcam fairy portal. Each session is tailored to the child, and is filled with enchantment and magic.
Visit website to find out more!
featured supporter
Little Rugby NSW
Catch, weave, chase, run, but most of all have FUN! Little Rugby runs a NSW network of fun, safe and non-contact footy classes for BOYS and GIRLS aged 2yrs – 7th birthday.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!