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  1. #41
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    Thanks Polly, I'll look into that

  2. #42
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    The water post birth is a good idea! Even if u have a cs. After the catheter comes out your bladder beads to remember how to wee. I was busting but I sat on the toilet for half an hour with the taps running than in the warm shower and drinking water to actually go and I weed out almost 2liters of fluid!

  3. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boobycino View Post
    Can I be picky - I dont think women have to lose their dignity birthing. You might lose your modesty when the desire to birth matter above all else but you should never have your dignity taken from you. Drs, mws and nurses have no right to touch your body without your consent or do anything to you without explanation.




    Sent from my GT-I9300 using BubHub
    Agreed. I had a wonderful, dignified experience. And no-one grabbed at my boobs or anything. I had heard lots of such stories but it just never happened to me & DD is exclusively breastfed.

    OP, I wasn't prepared for what demand feeding actually entails! I have the hungriest baby in the world so my boobs are hers essentially. So if you are breastfeeding be prepared to give your boobies over to your baby!

    I also didn't realise DTD would hurt quite so much the first time afterwards! I had stitches & we waited 6 weeks.

    Another thing - DP & I are extremely close & spend lots of time together, so I didn't expect to miss him. But devoting my time & my boobies to DD leaves almost no time for DP (DD doesn't sleep anywhere but on my chest - guarding her boobies I guess) and I really miss that intimacy. Even just time to snuggle is impossible to find.

    Your house will get messy & out of control. You will have days where you never make it out of the bedroom or your pyjamas. But thats ok.

    Oh and also, everyone will tell you how to parent. Even people you don't know.

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to becandabub For This Useful Post:

    steffy89  (18-07-2012)

  5. #44
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    I second watching happiest baby on the block, & add dunsten's baby language to the list. Amazing stuff!!
    Last edited by becandabub; 18-07-2012 at 05:16.

  6. #45
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    - hand expressing is WAY more painful than I expected. It's basically a nipple cripple.

    - hit the prunes hard in the weeks leading up to the birth. Like triple what you think you should have.

    - you love your baby when you see it, would die for it. But you don't know it all that well. The "oh my god I'm going to explode with love" feelings come further down the track.

    - even though I was quite happy I couldn't stop crying. Stupid hormones.

    - formula is fine. Never let anyone make you feel guilty if you need to feed your baby formula. And it doesn't mean your bubba won't take the boob later.

    - you don't always have to wait 6 weeks after a CS to drive. Check with your insurance company, most say if your doc says its okay then it's not an issue.

    - have someone stay overnight at the hospital, especially if you have a CS. Getting in and out of bed it exhausting, much easier to have someone hand you the baby.

    - get used to cold toast!

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  8. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by anabanana12 View Post
    Oh god! All of your answer, whilst enlightening, are absolutely terrifying!

    My partner, despite having a huge heart deep down, is a complete jokester with no filter from brain to mouth and I know will be pulling faces at me, hiding his eyes and holding back laughter and or screams during childbirth. Even though I know he won't mean to upset me I'm worried he won't be ready for all of the above should it happen and will make me feel terrible...

    SO on a slightly unrelated topic: How do I prepare my partner for dealing with the things you don't know or wouldn't expect about childbirth and the first few days/weeks after?
    I had the same fears for DH - he just instinctively reacts to things with facial expressions etc without thinking. I told him that I was worried he would do that during L&D and that I would remember it and be really hurt. I told him that he HAD to think about how to mask his disgust if anything disgusting happened i.e if I pooed! Luckily I didn't poo (my biggest fear), but he would have seen other things that wouldn't have been pretty I am sure. He was great during the whole thing.

    Things that I didn't know:
    - That it was very common to suffer stress incontinence after pregnancy and childbirth and that my mother had suffered from this. I would have been much more vigilant with my PF exercises during pregnancy if I had known.

    - That returning to exercise after 6 weeks is really only starting very gentle exercise due to weak PF muscles and core muscles. That if you start running etc too early, it can cause vaginal prolapse! That hasn't happened to me luckily. I did jog too early once or twice before I went to a physio and was strictly banned from any high impact exercise. It is frustrating seeing other women say that they started running 1 week out etc, but I know I am doing the right thing for my body.

    - How hard breastfeeding is for many women (not all), but that with perserverance it does get better and the hard times early on are SO worth it.

    - That I would get more sleep with a newborn than I did when I was pregnant as it is possible to have a baby that sleeps through the night from early on, but it is by no means the norm. I am just lucky to have a very easy baby. When I was pregnant I was waking 3-4 times a night and having trouble getting back to sleep due to leg cramps, needing to pee and just being generally uncomfortable!

    - I too was not prepared for how saggy my belly would be after birth! I had a lot of stretch marks too so I was worried it was how it would look forever, but it has firmed up a lot now.

    - That it would be really hard to lose weight when breastfeeding. I had read that breastfeeding would cause weight loss just by the use of extra calories. Nope. My weight hasn't shifted since DD was 2 weeks old. I am now starting to focus on eating really healthily and exercising more.

    - How hard it would be to live away from my parents and knowing that their relationship with their granddaughter wouldn't be as close as I would like.

  9. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to kucingcantik For This Useful Post:

    anabanana12  (18-07-2012),gluteousmaximus  (18-07-2012)

  10. #47
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    A couple of things I experienced:

    I found that grazing hurt infinity times worse than stitches, so much so I couldn't wee for a few days without crying out. My advice is if you have pain while weeing, get some Xylocaine gel from the chemist which will numb any sore bits and make weeing a breeze And Coloxyl or prunes to get the bowels moving

    I thought I was lucky only really bleeding for a week after birth. Then I suspected all was not well. In the end, I discovered I had a slight infection inside and had to go on antibiotics.

    Don't be afraid to ask for no visitors if you are feeling overwhelmed, or specifying a half hour visit time, etc. I dreaded the idea of visitors other than immediate family for the first few weeks. People will understand, especially anyone who is also a parent.

    Post natal depression is nothing to be ashamed of and is surprisingly very common. No matter how bad you feel for having bad thoughts, or guilty for feeling down when you should bd happy - if you don't feel right, please ask for help and see your doctor about it.

    That's all I have for now

  11. #48
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    Be mentally & emotionally prepared for any kind of birth.....I'd only read about & prepared for a vaginal delivery--so after labouring for 22 hours, only being 1-2 cm dilated & having an emergency c-section was not expected & I was devastated.

    In retrospect it doesn't matter, as long as your baby arrives here healthy!

    Breast feeding is really hard! It took us a good eight weeks before it was truly working. But so worthwhile to look at those chubby little thighs & know your hard work paid off!

    It's ok to cosleep if it means you all get some sleep!

    Try to have a shower b4 your partner leaves for work each day -- you'll feel human & if you're dressed it makes it easier to leave the house for a much needed walk & fresh air!

    Frozen meals are a godsend in those first few weeks, start preparing now!

    If you don't like a midwife in hospital, ask for another one. The good ones outweigh the bad ones, & no one should be upsetting you when you are tired hormonal & learning a brand new job in life!

    Enjoy those newborn snuggles, they grow far too quickly

  12. #49
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    After birth your bits are all swollen and bruised..., my savior was to pee in the shower.

    If your being stitched up, the OB might pop a voltaren up your poop shoot.

    After birth, when your ready for a shower and you look at yourself and the room, don't be scared to think "how did I survive that?!"
    So much blood and gunk.

    And your not a bad mum if you:
    Don't go swimming with bub.
    Don't go to story time.
    Give it formula.
    Give it a dummy.
    Etc etc...

    My hardest lesson learnt is:
    You don't know hard until you are really sick and have to look after a baby. But it's ok to ask for help or a break

  13. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by Newbie79 View Post
    Be mentally & emotionally prepared for any kind of birth.....I'd only read about & prepared for a vaginal delivery--so after labouring for 22 hours, only being 1-2 cm dilated & having an emergency c-section was not expected & I was devastated.

    In retrospect it doesn't matter, as long as your baby arrives here healthy!

    Breast feeding is really hard! It took us a good eight weeks before it was truly working. But so worthwhile to look at those chubby little thighs & know your hard work paid off!

    It's ok to cosleep if it means you all get some sleep!

    Try to have a shower b4 your partner leaves for work each day -- you'll feel human & if you're dressed it makes it easier to leave the house for a much needed walk & fresh air!

    Frozen meals are a godsend in those first few weeks, start preparing now!

    If you don't like a midwife in hospital, ask for another one. The good ones outweigh the bad ones, & no one should be upsetting you when you are tired hormonal & learning a brand new job in life!

    Enjoy those newborn snuggles, they grow far too quickly
    All of the above!!!!

    I still had a vaginal delivery after a very short labour, but nothing prepared me for the intensity.

    I even had to ask not to be assigned a certain middy in maternity, as she made me feel like crap.

    With breastfeeding, I thought it would come naturally, but it's been really hard.

    My mum has 9 kids, all natural drug free labors, all breastfed with no bottle or dummy and all cloth nappies...I have ha to come to terms with the fact I might need some of the 'helping' items!


 

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