+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 4 of 4
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    1,788
    Thanks
    118
    Thanked
    98
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Single parents... Advice needed!

    Hi everyone! 

    So, I've recently started seeing a man. First one since I left the ex 4 months ago. It seems soon, but I also should've left much sooner than I did, so by the time I did we all but hated each other. 

    That's beside the point 

    My question is: How do you know what to do when you start dating? In regards to the new man/woman meeting your kids? Should they meet Ex-DP before they meet DD? Should he have to "approve" of who will be possibly spending a large amount of time with DD? What have you done and what is your experience?

    I always thought that I'd want to leave it at least 3 months before a prospective other half met DD, and that I'd introduce them to Ex-DP first. Now I don't know that I like that plan at all. It's not that I'm in a rush to play happy families, I just know that the ex will do WHATEVER he can to push my buttons and have as negative an effect on my life as he possibly can. 

    Any advice would be AWESOME! 

    Thanks ladies!

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using BubHub

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    6,213
    Thanks
    387
    Thanked
    594
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Why introduce him to ex-DP at all? He's now your ex. Yes, he is the father of your dd, but he shouldn't have any say in your choice of boyfriend (unless he is abusive/etc of your dd, but that's a whole other issue).

    My main advice would be to take the relationship super slow. In time if you think the relationship is looking promising introduce him to your dd, but take that slow too. You've just had a major break up (regardless of how long you had issues prior to the break up, you've only been apart 4 months) and you need time to recover from that and make sure you are in the right head space to understand completely what you want/need from a new partner.

    All the best!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    1,788
    Thanks
    118
    Thanked
    98
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Thanks Mim This is what I want to hear! I will certainly be taking things slowly. He lives over an hour away however, so weekends (while I'm studying full time) are the only times we'll get together. DD has every second weekend with her dad.

    I think I'm scared that when he finds another gf (DD's dad), I will want to know who is spending time with her. Is it just me? Is that something you get used to? So I figured I'd grant the ex the same courtesy...

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using BubHub

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Melbourne
    Posts
    186
    Thanks
    34
    Thanked
    24
    Reviews
    0
    I left my Ex back in aug last year, after telling him for 2 years if he doesnt sort out his life im leaving. When i finally left he was shocked that i moved on so quickly ( Oct ) I told him back in june when i went overseas by myself for 10 days that it was over and i was leaving. My partner then met my daughter and my ex at the same time as i was picking her up and he was with me. She is now in my custody 100% and her dad doesnt see her and my partner takes all responsibility of her.

    I think that only you know when the time is right. I only introduced my ex to my partner due to my ex having full control over everything i did still. Otherwise i wouldnt of done it at all.


 

Similar Threads

  1. Social group for single parents to meet other single parents
    By singledad2768 in forum Single Parents
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 18-09-2012, 08:39
  2. Single parents of 1 child financial advice please.
    By AndrewTheEmu in forum Single Parents
    Replies: 43
    Last Post: 30-07-2012, 15:50
  3. Advice needed from parents of babies who had terrible wind pain/colic
    By Witchypoo in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 23-12-2011, 17:35

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
WaterWipes
Give your babies bottom a gift this Xmas! They are the only wipe made using just water and a drop of grapefruit seed extract and may help avoid nappy rash. Check out the great reviews on bubhub and see our website for more info and availability.
sales & new stuffsee all
True Fairies
True Fairies is the first interactive website where children can engage and speak with a real fairy through the unique webcam fairy portal. Each session is tailored to the child, and is filled with enchantment and magic.
Visit website to find out more!
featured supporter
Innovations Sports Physiotherapy
Women’s Health Physios who are able to assess and treat a wide range of Pregnancy and Post Natal Issues. We offer Post Natal Pilates Classes taken by our Physios. These classes help you rebuild strength through your Core and Pelvic Floor.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!