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  1. #21
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    Eko is offline Acrobatic Dominatrix.
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    That's a bit rough. At 33 weeks pregnant, I'd be crawling up the walls to get some time to myself, whether with my child or step children haha. It's no fun when someone pulls plans out from under your feet no matter what the situation.

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    I'm not saying that she doesn't deserve a break. I would be directing my frustration at the mother though, it sounds like she is the one making things difficult. I'd be pretty upset if I had kids that weren't my current partners and he wanted more time off from them - it sounds like you need to explain your reasoning calmly and clearly, otherwise he might just think you don't want them around for no particular reason.

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    I too can understand where your DH Is coming from, I would be upset also... But then I can also understand that you need a break too ...

    Hope your ok xx

    Also can I please join the private group

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    Quote Originally Posted by withloveandlimits View Post
    I'm not saying that she doesn't deserve a break. I would be directing my frustration at the mother though, it sounds like she is the one making things difficult. I'd be pretty upset if I had kids that weren't my current partners and he wanted more time off from them - it sounds like you need to explain your reasoning calmly and clearly, otherwise he might just think you don't want them around for no particular reason.
    The mother has already agreed to have the kids during the day to give the OP a break. The OPs DH wants her to have them instead, while he works. He knows she is heavily pregnant with complications. She's organised for her step kids to be with their mother so she can rest- he is the one wanting her to change it and mind kids in this state when she obviously needs the rest. The reasons should surely be self evident. I really don't see why this should upset her DH at all. I think he should be a bit more considerate and understanding actually!

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  7. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by withloveandlimits View Post
    I'm not saying that she doesn't deserve a break. I would be directing my frustration at the mother though, it sounds like she is the one making things difficult. I'd be pretty upset if I had kids that weren't my current partners and he wanted more time off from them - it sounds like you need to explain your reasoning calmly and clearly, otherwise he might just think you don't want them around for no particular reason.
    I think its completely normal to want a break from your kids, step kids or biological!

    I sure as hell know I sometimes need a break from my own kids, that doesn't mean I don't love then, it Means I'm human.

    Goodness me, I'm sorry you've been made to feel bad OP, I don't have step kids but I was a step kid growing up. Its a hard balance, I really Hope your DH supports you and let's you have the break xo

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using BubHub

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    Quote Originally Posted by peanutmonkey View Post
    I think its completely normal to want a break from your kids, step kids or biological!

    I sure as hell know I sometimes need a break from my own kids, that doesn't mean I don't love then, it Means I'm human.

    Goodness me, I'm sorry you've been made to feel bad OP, I don't have step kids but I was a step kid growing up. Its a hard balance, I really Hope your DH supports you and let's you have the break xo

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using BubHub
    Pretty sure I JUST said that she was allowed to want a break. At which point did I say she was being a monster? Oh that's right, I didn't. I was just pointing out that maybe her DH is just hearing the "I need a break from YOUR kids" part.

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    Quote Originally Posted by withloveandlimits View Post
    Pretty sure I JUST said that she was allowed to want a break. At which point did I say she was being a monster? Oh that's right, I didn't. I was just pointing out that maybe her DH is just hearing the "I need a break from YOUR kids" part.
    Yes, she does need a break from HIS kids. There's nothing wrong with that. They ARE his kids. Unless you've been a step parent it's probably hard to understand but the whole Brady bunch image is rubbish. It's much harder than that. And even when you adore your step kids (I do mine) they still aren't "yours".

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    I'm not a step parent and I get it.
    Yes by marrying him she took on those kids in some ways BUT they have 2 parents to meet their needs and that's what those parents should be doing. She's a step parent she didn't adopt them.

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  14. #29
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    Gee I'm sorry to have started a semi war. I don't want to offend or upset anyone.

    I'm grateful that those who are, and are not, step parents, can see where im coming from.

    As another post said "I am their step parent, and yes I took on the responsibility of helping to raise them, but I did not adopt them"!! These kids do still have a BM and BF.

    This whole situation has made things terribly tense here at home, but I am just going to have to deal with that. I hate that I'm being made out to be a nasty woman, which I'm sure is exactly what my DH thinks i am
    Right now.

    Lookin forward to an uncomplicated week.

    Thanks for your support ladies

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    Quote Originally Posted by angenrod View Post
    Gee I'm sorry to have started a semi war. I don't want to offend or upset anyone.

    I'm grateful that those who are, and are not, step parents, can see where im coming from.

    As another post said "I am their step parent, and yes I took on the responsibility of helping to raise them, but I did not adopt them"!! These kids do still have a BM and BF.

    This whole situation has made things terribly tense here at home, but I am just going to have to deal with that. I hate that I'm being made out to be a nasty woman, which I'm sure is exactly what my DH thinks i am
    Right now.

    Lookin forward to an uncomplicated week.

    Thanks for your support ladies
    Meh, it's bub hub. It's like Newton's law of motion. For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. You can't have an opinion on here without someone thinking the opposite. Which is normally fine but gets very contentious

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