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  1. #1
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    Default Yes! Look at me! My child has a black eye.

    Well my 17mo has a black eye.
    *Gasp*

    Alrighty.
    So my little girls is prone to wind up in DR surgeries, ER..
    Only last week I posted on here telling all about our scary night we had with her in hospital.
    She can be very curious... All it takes is for me to turn my head for 30 seconds and she is in what feels like a life or death situation.

    So on Saturday I was hanging up the washing, DD was outside with me.
    She wonders around the garden etc
    This is a daily thing. I usually let her run free and play whilst hanging up the washing. This was the only time i never stressed about what she will do next every 5 seconds.
    We have an out door setting, big table.. You get the idea.
    I never thought this was something to "Baby Proof" so to speak because.. Well.. Its a table! Not to mention slowly our house is getting more and more empty as things have been put away or up way to high for eyes to see because of my curious little girl.
    Any way back to the story..
    So I'm hanging out the washing, I couldn't see dd. Yes, big mistake on my part.. I should know better with a monkey for a child
    This is usually fine as I'm just thinking she must be in her sand pit as I could hear her babbling to herself.
    I usually pop my head around the corner every so often when hanging up washing to double check she is doing ok.
    Next thing I hear a loud crash and this horrible cry.. You know the kind of cry that stops your heart?
    Makes you drop everything and run to the sound of the cry.. And before you even see what the crying is from your already crying your self? Well it was that type of situation.

    I find dd on the ground (cement) and a big flower pot that was in the middle of the table, off the table and dirt everywhere.
    Now I didn't see how this unfolded but it was pretty obvious she has climbed up on one of the chairs, gotten on the table and grabbed the Flower pot.. Somehow tried to get down off the table with the flower pot.. That's my best guess.
    Either was dd had hit her head HARD and it was another trip to our local DR.
    No concession (thank god) but he said her head would be very sore and he could see a bruise brewing on her forehead.

    Fast forward to Sunday morning.. She wakes up with a massive! And I mean huge black eye!
    Called our dr Monday morning who said bumps to head/face can often cause blood to pool around the eye and cause a black eye even if the eye wasn't hit.
    Putting all the events together from Saturday.. The black eye is a result from the fall.

    Now I was prepared for the horrible looks when going into public.. If I had it my way I would keep her inside until the bruising went down.. But I need to go to important appointments this week.. A family birthday dinner.. Just things that you can't postpone and as a mother your child goes with you most of the time.

    I thought I was prepared for the stairs.. The horrid looks.. Possible questions from strangers etc.
    My thinking was, if I seen a young toddler with a large black eye I would most likely look too!
    It's not the best look for a child to have. And not the most ideal place for a child to have a bruise.

    But of course.. Today I had someone (a stranger) give me a lecture.. Asking me for my name..
    She looked just about ready to rip my dd out of my arms!!
    Needless to say I'm quite worried now..
    I know it's a good thing there are people out there looking out for children who are not in ideal homes etc.
    But that's far from what my dd has.
    Maybe I am a bad mum because all the accidents seem to keep happening now matter how much I try and watch her or how many times I try and remove dangerous things from the house.. Somehow I manage to stuff up and dd gets into dangerous situations.
    Everyone who watches dd, her daycare she goes to once a week all say how much of a handful she can be with putting herself in hurtful situations so quickly.

    It's all really starting to get to me.. I'm wondering what it is that I seem to do wrong.
    Yes one can say "watch her more carefully" but honestly I do.
    It's actually quite stressful to have to pretty much hold on to her all the time in fear.
    And then I'll go to the toilet.. Hang out the washing.. Go to get something out of a different room and come back to find her bouncing off the walls.. Up on things she had climbed.. I could go on..

    Really needed to vent this all out.
    I have to go out again this afternoon to get some forms signed and im now stressing about looks and snickers.. Or more lectures.
    Its all getting very exhausting and gets me really worried.
    *breath in and out* *breathe in and out*

  2. #2
    OJandMe's Avatar
    OJandMe is offline I am the strength my children will have.
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    Take heart. Happens to us all at times.

    When Lysander was going through the 'learning to walk' phase he CONSTANTLY had bumps and bruisers and scratches...

    Every time I took him to kindy I had to explain another bruise! To the point where one day one of the other ladies came in and looked at him and said "Oh ANOTHER bruise today Lysander" and shot me the deadliest look! I felt so cranky, I wanted to say "Sorry are you accusing me of something?!"

    People will look... but you can't control that. All you can treat is the injury. Don't worry about them, just worry about her. She'll grow out of it.

  3. #3
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    I had to take 5yo DD to school last year...with a horrid black eye.

    The reason? Her 2yo brother hit her on the eye socket with my empty coffee cup

    We walked in, greeted by her teacher and Saud "please excuse her black eye, her brother attacked her with a coffee cup" blushed, and left



    *I can haz typos*

  4. #4
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    ohhh, I hate that! Happens to the best of us though. A couple of years ago one of my children stood up too fast when I was leaning over and head butted me right in the eye socket. You should have seen the nasty looks my husband got when people saw my black eye.

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    Try not to stress, we have all been there!

    DD1 in particular was an 'adventurous' child! Her greatest achievement was stacking 2 child size chairs one on top of the other onto a small table to use as a ladder to reach the honey that was put on top of the fridge to stop her getting it. And DS1 has been to the ER plenty of times, broken arm, broken front tooth, stood on a nail that went right through his foot, the list goes on.

    Just a couple of weeks ago DD1, who is now 11, somehow whacked her own knee into her face while preforming some amazing trampoline stunts. Not only did this result in a huge black eye, but it was so swollen she could hardly see out of it! The bruise lasted close to 2 weeks, and went through many colour changes from black to purple and finally yellow. We got plenty of looks from strangers, but I just tried to ignore them.

    All I can say is that your daughter will get older and learn her limitations and boundaries. But she will probably always be a daredevil!
    Hugs, it can be exhausting parenting a child who is into, and onto, everything in sight!

  6. #6
    AndrewTheEmu is offline Bubhub Ambassador - tongue in cheek
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    Oh you poor thing! (and poor DD ) sounds like you have a monkey on your hands! Hope she is feeling (and looking better soon.

    Thought I'd let you know my DD had a black eye the other week too.

    She had an accident at daycare (thank goodness it was there really otherwise I'm sure they'd be asking questions)

    I took her food shopping at our little local shop the next day (where I've been shopping for 6 years & know most staff by name) and STILL got the most awful filthy looks. I felt horrible. I just wanted to tell everyone I passed the whole story. I actually made a loud point of telling the cashier what happened on the way out & hoped shed spread the word

    I couldnt bare the next days outting so I put a patch on DDs eye I'm sorry I know it's stupid but I seriously couldn't handle what other people must've been thinking (im a victim of child abuse and im sure that played a role in my over reaction)

    We didn't have to go anywhere for the next 4 days after that (apart from school & they already knew the cause) and by then she looked much much better.

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    Naw u poor thing!!
    I know exactly how u feel! I'm often you in this situation!
    My DD had a massive black bruise/egg on her forehead and just as its fading last night she managed a new one right on top of it!
    A couple of weeks ago she gave me a black eye with a board book- so u can imagine the looks my husband got when we were all out together! Haha poor fella!
    You are not a bad mum even in the slightest! It's not physically possible to watch them 24/7! We just have crazy kids! Should anyone comment ask them if they would like to spend an hour with her and ur happy to count the bruises she gets in their care!

    Eta: she is 16 months so they are obviously at the same nutso stage as each other
    Last edited by Pipsicle; 11-07-2012 at 12:18.

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    You poor thing! Try not to take it to heart tho.

    My DS is also very accident prone.. we have been to the ER several times and he is not even three yet. A few months ago he slipped in the shower (I was in there with him, right beside him, and he was standing on a non-slip mat), hit his face on the tiles and split his cheek open.

    Trip to A&E, patched it up with glue. The next day he had a massive black eye. I had to take him with me shopping, and a man queuing up behind me pointed to us and said to his little girl "that's what happens when you are naughty". I could have died.

    He also broke his leg, had stitches, countless bumps and bruises, and one minor operation (grommets) all before he turned two! When he broke his leg, I actually had the child protection unit from the hospital do a follow-up call. It had happened while he was at daycare, so I was able to send them the incident report and contact details, but still, it was very humiliating.

    So I hope that makes you feel better! Some kids are just clumsy I suppose. He is starting to get a bit better now, but I'm still not game enough to put him back in the shower!

    You could try giving her Arnica, you can get it in little tablets from a natropath. It supposedly helps with the healing. My little boy's bruises do seem to get better very quickly when I'm giving him this.



    Ooo and take some pics! I know its cruel, but one day you can look back and laugh! Or bring them out at her 21st..

  9. #9
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    I used to get this at daycare ALL the time, DS is just a full blown clutz and unfortunately he gets it from his mother! ha! I thought they were going to call social services on me til one week itmust of clicked because they now say to me atleast once a week! "hes really clumsy huh!"... he also does stupid things like puts buckets on his head and walks around, well, duh, of course you are going to walk into a wall!

    Hugs, the looks can be awful I know, but like you said they dont know your DD or you, you are a good Mum!

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Refresh View Post
    ohhh, I hate that! Happens to the best of us though. A couple of years ago one of my children stood up too fast when I was leaning over and head butted me right in the eye socket. You should have seen the nasty looks my husband got when people saw my black eye.

    My poor Dh was looking after her yesterday afternoon and had to run into the shop to pick up some chicken for dinner.. He said a few people just looked at him shocked and a few shook there heads
    Luckily we didn't go out as a family earlier on in the week because I had my wisdom teeth pulled last Thursday and I had bruises all up my neck.. Jaw.. Cheeks
    It didn't go away until yesterday morning and is now completely covered by make-up.. Buy I'm sure poor Dh would have copped a lot if he had a bruised up puffy faced wife and a child with a black eye if we had the courage to step out of the house on Sunday

    Quote Originally Posted by TheSudgestionator View Post
    I couldnt bare the next days outting so I put a patch on DDs eye I'm sorry I know it's stupid but I seriously couldn't handle what other people must've been thinking (im a victim of child abuse and im sure that played a role in my over reaction)
    the patch on the eye does not sound silly at all!
    With the looks I have gotten over the past few days would you believe I was actually considering putting a little foundation on her eye to lessen the darkness?
    The looks just make me feel like scum.. Or like a trashy mother..
    They eye patch sounds a lot better then my make-up thought

    I'm sorry you went though that as a child


 

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