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  1. #31
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    Nah.

    As I see it, I am incredibly fortunate to the able to carry and birth babies, it's such an amazing experience. I definitely think that men miss out on so much! So to "pull rank" would be adding insult to injury IMO. Plus I have no rank to pull.

    I think it should be a joint decision but I do think that if both parents can't agree on a name they love then someone should have to compromise.

  2. #32
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    Your OH could always say that without him, there wouldn't be a bub in the first place. It takes 2 to tango.

    See, I had a few names picked out but did not have an ultimate name for DS. I waited for him to be born first before picking a name from my short list.
    He didn't look like some of the names I chose for him.

  3. #33
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    It should be a mutual decision.
    With the twins we each chose our favourite name for 1 child. We both liked both names so no problems there.

    This time round, the twins (4 years old) suggested a boys name and a girls name, hubby and I love both names that the boys have picked. So we are all set this time.

  4. #34
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    I believe you can only 'pull rank' in an unequal partnership, and I wouldn't want to be in one of those. If it was a business partnership and you both had a 50/50 share in the business you would agree together on a name for your business. Just because this decision is more emotional does not give one equal partner more rights than the other equal partner.

    I suggest if you can't both agree on a name, and neither of you will compromise to make the other happy. You will need to hyphenate or blend your two favourite names ... Or just randomly pick one from a book!

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    I'm getting pretty close to 'pulling rank' and naming our coming DD. I've given DH heaps of suggestions of my favorites and he says "NO" straight out to all of them. And on top of that when I ask him to give suggestions he has 1 name which I don't like, maybe as a second name only. It's been months and only 8 weeks left till due date and he doesn't seem to want to compromise with my suggestions so I may well be naming our daughter without his help!

    Oh and it was bad enough with our DS, the same thing happened and I ended up giving in and agreeing on the name he liked cos he didn't like any of mine.

  6. #36
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    I'm not pulling rank but it is my turn to name this baby!!! I think DH technically but very sneakily pulled rank for the last, our first son, because DH would say no to everything I suggested and would only suggest the 1 name. He wore me down and that is what DS is called.

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    I don't really see it as "pulling rank" i really hate that term. If he really hated the name, then i wouldn't go with it. A name is a name.


    We don't have kids yet but are doing IVF. We have some names picked out, but a few of the ones i really love dp is a but iffy about. However after going through all the stress of the IVF and if we are lucky enough to have a baby then after giving birth, my DP said I can name the baby anything I want


    When I was born, my brother and my dad "pulled rank" on my mum and thank god, or i would have ended up with a very unfortunate name!
    Last edited by Clementine Grace; 02-07-2012 at 15:51.

  8. #38
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    I think people are taking the 'pulling rank' thing out of context. It wasn't meant as a 'I'm more important than you' thing. At least, not the way I took it. I think perhaps something along the lines of 'I put in the higher physical investment' would be a bit more accurate .

    I HATE DS's middle name. As in, can't freakin' stand it. Every single male I've known with the same name has been either an idiot or a jerk. Everyone but FIL, who he's named after.
    DH insisted that we use that name and no matter how many arguments we had over it he refused to budge. I hate hate HATE it. But we used it because it was so important to DH to use his dad's name.
    We both love DS's first name so that took out some of the sting but I really dislike his middle name. DH took it personally that I didn't like it because it's his dad's name, but he wouldn't take into account the fact that a negative association is just as strong, if not stronger, than a positive.

    So yeah... I sure do resent having to use that name. But I pretty much ignore it. I don't use it on anything unless it's a formal document and I never use it unless he's in trouble. That's not to make his middle name negative for him, we just NEVER use middle names in my family unless the person is in trouble lmao.
    It's not to disrespect my FIL, it's just that I plain and simple dislike the name.

    Use the "I work harder" card if you want to, but remember that your partner will probably always be annoyed about it, even if it doesn't come up very often.

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    Clementine Grace  (02-07-2012),grumpysmurf  (02-07-2012)

  10. #39
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    Thanks for all your opinions!
    It was meant as a fairly light-hearted, not so serious question. However, just about any question in here can fire people up.
    My hubby picked DD1's first name and I picked middle. Then I picked DD2's first name and he picked middle. Now this is third and final and neither of us are willing to give up first name rights. I highly doubt we will agree on anything as we have extremely different tastes.
    Should be interesting...

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    Quote Originally Posted by JJZK View Post
    Thanks for all your opinions!
    It was meant as a fairly light-hearted, not so serious question. However, just about any question in here can fire people up.
    My hubby picked DD1's first name and I picked middle. Then I picked DD2's first name and he picked middle. Now this is third and final and neither of us are willing to give up first name rights. I highly doubt we will agree on anything as we have extremely different tastes.
    Should be interesting...
    we are expecting number three and are in the EXACT same boat!! he picked dd's name, i picked ds's. luckily we have the same tastes, although one of us is usually the voice of reason (eg i "pulled rank" and said no when he wanted to name our ds "cotton" and he did the same when i liked the name "lavender")

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