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  1. #11
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    I've been told its all about routine, and that the first 6 months is the hardest! But after that it's pretty smooth sailing most of the time!
    You only get give what you can cope with, and if you get stuck don't be scared to ask for a break or some help!

    I'm due in December, and my youngest will be 12 months old and we also have a 8 year old. So I have asked the same question many many times. I'm sure you'll be fine

  2. #12
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    I have a bigger gap between mine, so don't have any advice as such but the adjustment is hard at any age. My older was similarly dependent on me even though he was older. It's amazing how resilient we are and what we can cope with when we have to. I imagine you will do beautifully once you get there and all the best!

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    I have a 20 month old boy and nearly 2 week old baby girl. I am also a single mum. I was really quite worried about how i'd cope, but I have honestly found tge transition from 1 to 2 easier then having my first. It hasnt been nearly as challenging as I expected ir what people had me believe it would be.

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  4. #14
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    NessaM24 is offline Fred, why don't you go outside and vroom that lawn mower around the yard?
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    I have 11 months between my two dd's and all I can say is be flexible! :-)

  5. #15
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    Hi
    I have a 2 under the age of 20mths and I'm pregnant with number 3 due in January.
    So I will have 3 under the age of 2 n a half years.
    DH works away a week at a time and when he is home we have his 4 yr old daughter. DH really doesn't help out much at all he will do the occasional get them dressed after a bath but that is really it..
    My 2 have been sick for seems like 2 mths straight, chest infections viral infections & asthma.😷Then add into that mix my MOrning sickness and then the flu. 😒
    I recently started to notice I was crying because my baby was crying. 😓Then I'd just cry coz I was sick of vomit and cleaning sheets and carpet everyday..So u would say I was starting to get depressed. I spoke with DH about my feelings and we are now trialling an Aupair. 😄
    Yay thank god HELP
    She starts tomorrow so we will see if my depression starts to ease up otherwise I'm off to the DR

  6. #16
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    I have a 22mth gap (DD1 is 22mths and DD2 is 2wks old) and so far its been fairly easy. The newbie lives in the ergo and or the capsule during the day. I get up half an hour earlier than DD1 to shower for the day. As soon as DD2 goes for her first nap I prepare dinner (if I dont want to use a cooked meal from the deep freeze), organize lunch, pack morning tea/nappy bags into the car. Once she wakes up and feeds we head outdoors to the park/library/kindergym etc. This allows DD1 to continue her life.

    I still have DD1 in daycare 2 days a week whilst on mat leave so these are the days I do batch cooking, big cleans on one day and fix all appts/social stuff on the other.

    I also park myself on the couch at 3.30pm and cluster feed DD2 whilst doing afternoon tea/puzzles/drawings/blocks with DD1. This way by the time bedtime for her comes around at 7ish DD2 sleeps for 4-5hrs. The most important thing is that you get a good bedtime routine happening. DH puts DD1 down for bed and I pass out as soon as DD2 does. That way I get at least a few hours uninterrupted sleep. DD1 usually sleeps thru so DH gets up to her and resettles/comforts DD2 till 11pm unless she needs a feed

    I dont use any form of crying to 'manage' babies so yesterday DD1 didnt want to nap so I just popped her on my bed next to me and lay down next to her... then DD2 wanted a feed so popped her on the other side.... We all slept for 3hrs! So you might need to consider co-sleeping a way of keeping your babies happy.


    But I have an awesome family and my mum/aunt and cousins regularly visit to lend a hand or just for a conversation.

  7. #17
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    Hi tubster,

    I had a 20month gap between my two boys, I found the hardest part of the day was breastfeeding, DS1 had not long before weaned and when I was feeding his brother he would constantly climb on me, demand my attention, chuck tantrums etc. I found having a little play station set up really helped, also trying to feed when it was his nap time or meal time would keep him occupied long enough to feed and settle DS2.

    Apart from that I found the transition pretty easy, his brother adored him which was one thing I worried up. Just try and encourage bonding time between them. We used to let DS2 hold his brother on the couch (with our help) and play with him when he was having tummy time. I didn't find their age gap too much of a challange, and they are best of friends now! Goodluck

  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by OJandMe View Post
    Well apart from O and J.. coz they don't count...

    Gabriel and Julian are 13 months apart

    Julian and Lysander are 22 months apart.

    We have 5 kids 5yrs and under when Lysander was born..

    I think the gap between Lysander and Julian is a good one. (I think all of them were good ones, but that's the closest to your gap I think) Julz was old enough to feed himself and entertain himself for a while when Lysander was a baby.. and now at nearly 2 and nearly 4 they are pretty tight buddies. The only downside is that Julian doesn't quite get that Lysander can't 'play' the same way he does.. cute though. I hear little convos like "No Lysander, you have to put the track DOWN not keep throwing it away." And Lysander: "Otay"

    The biggest thing I thought I'd had to deal with was night wakings being staggered... so i took the really easy way out and co-slept and breastfed... that way Lysander was already with me if he woke at night, and Julian could just come into our bed and snuggle down like usual without me having to get up and go to a baby. It worked for us.
    My son currently sleep in his cot in our room, and almost every night for the past few weeks, hes been jumping to our bed around 4am, I let him because its been so cold. We like to move him to his own room in the enxt few months and get him use to it before my daughter arrives, but I can already see the potential problems. Hes not going to like it there and I dont like CIO. I will be breastfeeding my daughter. I can imgaine them waking eachother up in the mid of the night. I dont mind my son coming to our bed, but I dont want our daughter waking him up when shes up for a feed. Was that ever a problem for you? Maybe I am worrying way too much

  9. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia View Post
    I have a 22mth gap (DD1 is 22mths and DD2 is 2wks old) and so far its been fairly easy. The newbie lives in the ergo and or the capsule during the day. I get up half an hour earlier than DD1 to shower for the day. As soon as DD2 goes for her first nap I prepare dinner (if I dont want to use a cooked meal from the deep freeze), organize lunch, pack morning tea/nappy bags into the car. Once she wakes up and feeds we head outdoors to the park/library/kindergym etc. This allows DD1 to continue her life.

    I still have DD1 in daycare 2 days a week whilst on mat leave so these are the days I do batch cooking, big cleans on one day and fix all appts/social stuff on the other.

    I also park myself on the couch at 3.30pm and cluster feed DD2 whilst doing afternoon tea/puzzles/drawings/blocks with DD1. This way by the time bedtime for her comes around at 7ish DD2 sleeps for 4-5hrs. The most important thing is that you get a good bedtime routine happening. DH puts DD1 down for bed and I pass out as soon as DD2 does. That way I get at least a few hours uninterrupted sleep. DD1 usually sleeps thru so DH gets up to her and resettles/comforts DD2 till 11pm unless she needs a feed

    I dont use any form of crying to 'manage' babies so yesterday DD1 didnt want to nap so I just popped her on my bed next to me and lay down next to her... then DD2 wanted a feed so popped her on the other side.... We all slept for 3hrs! So you might need to consider co-sleeping a way of keeping your babies happy.


    But I have an awesome family and my mum/aunt and cousins regularly visit to lend a hand or just for a conversation.
    OMG you are so organized! I wish I was too! My son doesnt go to any daycare, maybe we should consider that. My family lives in NZ and his family is pretty full on so not able to help much. Its just me and my husband. We both work from home, our home based business is VERY busy! Without my help my husband would be FLAT out with no time to breath. So with the arrival of a newborn I am super nervous. I dont like using crying it out methods either and my son loves coming to our bed around 4am. I just dont know how its all going to work at night time!

  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Milktini View Post
    Hi tubster,

    I had a 20month gap between my two boys, I found the hardest part of the day was breastfeeding, DS1 had not long before weaned and when I was feeding his brother he would constantly climb on me, demand my attention, chuck tantrums etc. I found having a little play station set up really helped, also trying to feed when it was his nap time or meal time would keep him occupied long enough to feed and settle DS2.

    Apart from that I found the transition pretty easy, his brother adored him which was one thing I worried up. Just try and encourage bonding time between them. We used to let DS2 hold his brother on the couch (with our help) and play with him when he was having tummy time. I didn't find their age gap too much of a challange, and they are best of friends now! Goodluck
    I am worried about breastfeeding! I will be breastfeeding my daughter and I know my son is not going to like it. He cries whenever I am cuddling someone else even if its my husband! When I breastfeed my son, it took upto 45 min each feed and I feed him every 2 hours sometimes 1.5 hours! Even through out the night! I know my daughter might be different, but I am just so worried how its going to work!


 

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