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  1. #1
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    Default How do you know when your family is finished?

    I hope this is in the right section

    I am still a little undecided if I want another baby . Hubby and I had always decided on 2 maybe 3 kids. He is happy with 2, I am unsure. We have a son who will be 3 and a daughter who will be 1 next month. Although I am only 28, hubby is 38 and said that if we did have a 3rd it had to be done and dusted by the time he turned 40 (Jan 2014).

    I have days where I could cry thinking of only having the 2 kids followed by days where I think "what was I thinking". I would never create a whoopsie baby so it would only happen if hubby and I can agree on going back for 3rds although when I had a pregnancy scare earlier this month he wasn't worried if it turned out I was.

    I would never in a million years contemplate 4 pregnancies as 3 would be enough (although I fully understand the potential for twins). I fully understand that this would be it and if something happened whereby I needed a c-section I would happily get my tubes tied while on the table.

    I think the thing I would miss most isn't pregnancy (it seriously sucks for me!) but I do enjoy having a new baby and very much love breastfeeding (hence my daughter isn't even close to being weaned and still on 6 feeds a day).

    So does this desire ever disappear? Am I just longing for another baby because it is unlikely we'll have another? I feel somedays I could easily convince hubby into having another but on other days I can't even convince myself . I have no idea so any advice would be appreciated.

    Thanks in advance

  2. #2
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    To me it sounds as if you both wouldnt hate the idea of a third. my DP doesnt want anymore kids but I'm not sure like you. I always wanted more than 2 but in all reality we are both greatful for the 2 we have. I am having similar feelings to the ones you describe. We have decided that when dd2 is older we will look into fostering. Its a compromise that makes us both happy.

    I know I am fine with not having any more and I feel lik that is because I have 2 DD's who are happy and healthy. I think of people who have trouble having any at all and any urges to have more go away. Thats how I know.

  3. #3
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    For me the "desire" to have kids has never happened.. I have no desire to have any more kids.. We have 1 son and love him to bits but Yeh... No more for us thanks :-)

    ***Sent from my phone***

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by noobie View Post
    I hope this is in the right section

    I am still a little undecided if I want another baby . Hubby and I had always decided on 2 maybe 3 kids. He is happy with 2, I am unsure. We have a son who will be 3 and a daughter who will be 1 next month. Although I am only 28, hubby is 38 and said that if we did have a 3rd it had to be done and dusted by the time he turned 40 (Jan 2014).

    I have days where I could cry thinking of only having the 2 kids followed by days where I think "what was I thinking". I would never create a whoopsie baby so it would only happen if hubby and I can agree on going back for 3rds although when I had a pregnancy scare earlier this month he wasn't worried if it turned out I was.

    I would never in a million years contemplate 4 pregnancies as 3 would be enough (although I fully understand the potential for twins). I fully understand that this would be it and if something happened whereby I needed a c-section I would happily get my tubes tied while on the table.

    I think the thing I would miss most isn't pregnancy (it seriously sucks for me!) but I do enjoy having a new baby and very much love breastfeeding (hence my daughter isn't even close to being weaned and still on 6 feeds a day).

    So does this desire ever disappear? Am I just longing for another baby because it is unlikely we'll have another? I feel somedays I could easily convince hubby into having another but on other days I can't even convince myself . I have no idea so any advice would be appreciated.

    Thanks in advance
    My DP turns 40, next year & he said he is getting to old to have anymore lol lucky we are pregnant now with baby #2 girl after having a boy but I am only 23 so I think I may want another one in the future but not sure yet.

  5. #5
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    You just know!
    I got clucky again around the time my son (2nd bub) turned one ut it has definatly passed for me! I cant imagine being preg again and i definately cant image having another child.
    Since getting my life back (losing the baby weight, going back to work and starting my own business i can without a doubt say IM DONE HAVEING KIDS!!!

    I love the fact that our life as a family can start, camping, trips away and seeing my kids grow up. I know in myself i could never handle a 3rd.

    Sounds to me like you need another interest. Once i stopped focusing on pregnancy and babies and focused on my work and business the desire for another baby just disapeared. I even see other people with new babies and i dont want one!

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    I think it goes away when you have the amount you truly want. I 'settled' at two but in my heart knew I wanted one more. Now Im about to have my 3rd and am truly done and looking to get tubes tied. Never have been able to imagine 4 and I am certain I wouldnt want to have 4. I love big families but 3 was my magic number..

    I think if deep down yore not done it will continue to haunt you until you are

    Sent from my GT-I9000 using BubHub

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    Sounds like you and your OH would like a third - or at least don't hate the idea.

    We have two boys and that is it for us. Although I am a little sad I'll never be pregnant again (I love it!) I know
    I don't want any more kids. The thought of a third scares me a little!!

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by jennibear View Post
    Sounds to me like you need another interest.
    I breed and show ponies and do two different types of rifle shooting. If i had any more hobbies i'd be broke LOL Its interesting how yesterday i was keen, today i would quite happily keep my family as it is. I had a talk to hubby (or at least tried to) and he's happy with how things are. I think a lot of this stems from the fact that i feel i don't get much of a say at times on the big picture. He openly admitted that if we had of had 2 girls he would have wanted a 3rd, 2 boys he would have been content and one of each (which we have) content. And yet his excuse is that we can't afford another child. Hmmm interesting hey. Not don't get me wrong we usually agree and i do wonder whether feeling like i don't get a say is the only reason i'd like another baby. Like me wanting to replace the car and hubby doesn't so we have to keep the 16 year old s#!? box. Only 2 things we can't agree on LOL

  9. #9
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    I think you know when you are finished, when the thought of another makes you weak at the knees with fear and dread lol

  10. #10
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    My kids are almost exactly the same age as yours and same flavour combos We both regularly toy with the idea of having a third but not quite yet. I just don't feel we are a complete family iykwim? Room for one more at the inn yet


 

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