+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 3 FirstFirst 123 LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 26
  1. #11
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    10,012
    Thanks
    14,124
    Thanked
    7,612
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    I think if she isn't going to listen to Drs orders about a very serious medical condition, then personally I would cut ties with her.

  2. #12
    HugsBunny's Avatar
    HugsBunny is offline Once upon a time there was a bunny.........
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    6,603
    Thanks
    4,531
    Thanked
    1,966
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    As far as I was concerned, she'd have just lost any chance of being alone with the children again until she could prove that he wasn't going to put them in danger.

    I also would have gone and gotten the kids, knowing they were in an unsafe environment (ie the pillow and the lies).

    she sounds like a piece of work.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    1,812
    Thanks
    112
    Thanked
    699
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I would have been over there and taking my children home!!!!

    What does your DH think?!

    There is no way, no how my children would be in her care any longer!!

    She blatantly lied to you, tried to get your SIL to lie and is disregarding advice from medical professionals that say it could be difference between life and death for your DD!

    I would be getting your DH to go over there and voice concerns about this situation - I would not let this go!!

  4. #14
    DaughteroftheForest's Avatar
    DaughteroftheForest is offline Sometimes you have to forget what you want in order to remember what you deserve
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    2,049
    Thanks
    784
    Thanked
    492
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Thank you all for your replies, it's good to know I'm not over reacting.

    MIL dropped the girls off an hour ago. I confronted her about it while we were unloading the car and the kids were inside with DP. I was very straight forward and told her I was really upset and angry about what had happened that night, that I knew she had lied to me about the pillow and frankly I was furious. I told her I didn't want to get into it right now, I had had a horrible nights sleep and was extremely busy but that at some point in the near future we should sit down and have a long conversation about this. She didn't deny it, she just rolled her eyes and started going on about how it wasn't even a pillow really, it was a pillow slip with a thin piece of foam in it. I told her I didn't care (I said it a bit more colourfully than that) and that I had told her now wasn't the time to talk about so just drop it, which she did. She waited while I got the last few things from the car then drove off without saying goodbye to the girls, which had DD1 in tears when I went inside as she'd seen her drive off through the living room window.
    DP supports me completely. He's not as angry as I am but he's put up with his mums....little quirks all his life so I guess he's a bit immune. He doesn't want her having DD2 again but isn't sure about cutting off DD1 from her as they are very close. But I think offering for her to come her and see them when she wants is more than fair until she can reassure us both that she will actually listen to our wishes regarding our children instead of saying one thing and then doing another.

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    6,311
    Thanks
    2,387
    Thanked
    4,599
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    You have handled yourself so well. I would have been nowhere near as calm.

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to NancyBlackett For This Useful Post:

    GrabbyCrabby  (20-06-2012)

  7. #16
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    19,776
    Thanks
    5,212
    Thanked
    7,063
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    I think at the very least no sleepovers there with DD2 is best, I think you've done the right thing there. She doesn't seem to take it seriously and I feel if she won't listen to you on this extremely important issue, what else will she take upon herself to decide isn't important? The oxygen tank is annoying, bah, lets just unhook it?

    If you and DP and godmum ever need a deserved break, you know where I am

  8. #17
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    Country WA
    Posts
    6,643
    Thanks
    3,135
    Thanked
    3,028
    Reviews
    13
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I wouldn't be happy about the pillow, but it's the lying that concerns me more - and that she obviously thinks she can over rule your wishes as a parent. That is just not on.

  9. #18
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    547
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    268
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I would never leave my kids with her again ... She doesn't seem to grasp the seriousness of it ... This isn't like a 100s and 1000s sandwich for lunch or some Lollies right before dinner ... This is life and death stuff ... NEVER again!

  10. #19
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    1,110
    Thanks
    70
    Thanked
    652
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Honestly? Your babys safety is more important than not causing a scene for your toddler!! If that were me I'd be straight round there, grab the kids and leave. I'd suggest never leaving your MIL alone with the kids again. My mother is like this and her and I no longer talk because I don't let my mother control me anymore.

  11. #20
    DaughteroftheForest's Avatar
    DaughteroftheForest is offline Sometimes you have to forget what you want in order to remember what you deserve
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    2,049
    Thanks
    784
    Thanked
    492
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I've just received a very contrite message from her, where she apologises profusely for lying to me about it and not following my instructions to do with my child. she also included a message that she sent to SIL saying sorry to her for getting her stuck in the middle and how much she'd mucked up and would now have to deal with the consequences. But the message to SIL also included a reference to the 'the thinnest pillow ever, shouldn't even count as one' which really makes me think she's not sorry that she was in the wrong, she's sorry she got caught and is now trying to back peddle.
    Either way, I'm still so angry and upset. I won't be replying anytime soon. I have a feeling if I don't reply with gushing appreciation her humility will evaporate pretty quickly and then I'll get to know what she really thinks. And vice versa.

    Thank you Benji <3 you're such a sweetheart to offer. I might take you up on that in the future but aside from all this drama, I actually really didn't enjoy being away from DD2, it was like missing a limb. I think it will be awhile before I'll be able to go a night without her again, but when I am you'll be the first person I call

    And Renesme, while I totally understand how you feel, once I knew the pillow was out of her cot and that SIL was going to keep an eye on her, for me the immediate danger had passed and my focus became about all of my children. There are some situations where it is unavoidable that children will get caught in the middle of adult arguments, but after everything my children have been through in the past six months I wasn't going to make a calculated decision to expose my girls to conflict when I knew she had someone there to keep her safe.


 

Similar Threads

  1. At my wits end.
    By PorkyPies in forum 'No Cry' Sleeping Solutions
    Replies: 23
    Last Post: 13-09-2012, 16:04
  2. At my wits end.
    By lucymoo in forum General Sleeping & Settling Chat
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 26-08-2012, 23:51
  3. Im at my wits end :(
    By littlegreengeisha in forum Discipline & behaviour
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 07-08-2012, 16:26

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Shapland Swim Schools
Shapland's at participating schools offer free baby orientation classes once a month - no cost no catches. Your baby will be introduced to our "natural effects" orientation program develop by Shapland's over 3 generations, its gentle and enjoyable.
sales & new stuffsee all
Bub Hub Sales Listing
HAVING A SALE? Let parents know about it with a Bub Hub Sales listing. Listings are featured on our well trafficked Sales Page + selected randomly to appear on EVERY page
featured supporter
Sudocrem / Infacol
Sudocrem® Healing Cream is a soothing emollient cream which aids and assists in the management of nappy rash, eczema, abrasions, wounds and minor skin irritations. Infacol Wind Drops are an effective method of treating wind in infants.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!