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  1. #351
    Ana Gram's Avatar
    Ana Gram is offline 2008 WINNER - straight shooter award
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    Wow, what a thread.

    First of all, I think the article is poorly written, like many of her articles.

    Now, let me preface this with the fact that I had a traumatic birth. It has affected my life for 8 1/2 years. I will NEVER have another child and the hospital that was involved saw absolutely nothing wrong with any of their actions.

    We all read these sorts of articles with our own experience in our minds, so of course, as I read this article, I thought about my own experience. I got teary, got the shakes and wanted to throw up.

    I went in with no plan and no research. They nearly killed me. If they had pushed harder for the CS they wanted, they would have killed me.

    I have no doubts that there are women out there who are annoyingly pushy with their own birth plans, there are people like that everywhere, but I recognise there may be reasons behind it. They may have had previous trauma or they may have a friend who went trough something terrible like me.

    Personally, I think Mia is a bit of a twit. Like many opinion writers in newspapers. They are paid to cause a stir and what a smashing job of doing that she has done. She must be so pleased.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Alimia View Post
    When my son was born he had a congenital heart problem which wasn't picked up while pregnant. My son came out blue and not breathing, I was so lucky my paed was with me and began CPR on ds. He was put on a ventilator and I truly believe if he wasnt there ds wouldn't be here today. The amount of medical attention ds needed upon arrival no other person in that room would of been able to perform. That's why I am so thankful towards the medical profession.
    That's great, but a MW at home would've been able to do this also and maintain it until the child was taken to hospital.

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  4. #353
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    Grr, my post keeps disappearing!

    Quote Originally Posted by Benji View Post
    I truly believe the damage to my body wouldn't have occurred in a homebirth setting. I felt as though I was being rushed along in hospital. I was poked, prodded, yelled at... If I had've been given time for my baby to get in the right position and if I hadn't clammed up every time I was yelled at, I feel I would've been able to push when I was ready and not when they yelled at me to.

    I still suffer 6 years on.
    100% agree.

    If i was at home my waters wouldnt have been broken for me ( i didnt know i could refuse, and only a grunt during a contraction, was their permission). If i was at home i wouldnt have been given drugs that stopped my legs working, i wouldnt have been flat on my back for 6hrs, i wouldnt have been given a midline episiotomy (only given in dire circumstances or third world countries), i wouldnt have had my baby TORN from my body with a suction cap, i wouldnt have had my baby taken off me while i went to surgery to get my most intimate parts repaired. Yes this may have all been necessary after a transfer, but the fact that i birthed a baby almost the same size (which was apparently the reason my birth was so f#*&%$^ up) at the hospital MY way. I also got yelled at and sworn at. My baby was in NO distress whatsoever, but they wanted me out of the room as quick as possible, so they played the dead baby card and did whatever the hell they wanted to, to a young vulnerable, labouring mother.

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  6. #354
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    Everyone is entitled to make their own choices about what they do with their own bodies. But no one has the right to dictate to others what they should do. Yes medical professionals can give their medical opinions but they are after all just opinions, and not orders. Heck, even military personnel have the right to refuse medical treatment even if the person suggesting the treatment is a superior officer.

    Now the article was about birthzillas, people who talk about their births with an air of superiority. But that's not just homebirthers, is it?

    Every time someone suggests that if you care about your baby you'll go to hospital instead of staying home selfishly and taking unnecessary risk they are suggesting they're the better mother because they sacrifice any control over their body for their baby. They are leaving it to the experts because that's what good mothers do.

    Right....

    And then these same people claim that homebirthers are soooo judgemental and look down on them because they act so superior. Really? REALLY?

    Because I'm seeing a lot of suggestion regarding the selfishness and arrogance of homebirthers and a lot of suggestion about how good mums go to hospital "for the good of the baby." A lot of suggestion that mums birthing at home only care about themselves, not their baby.

    I think all mothers want to believe they made the very best decision for their unborn child. And you know what, most do.

    How about we stop bashing intelligent caring women who make careful thought out plans for their births when there are women who smoke, drink, and take drugs during pregnancy, spend their baby bonus on plasmas and go out for smoke breaks between contractions.

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  8. #355
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    headoverfeet is offline The truth will set you free, but first it will **** you off. -Gloria Steinem
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    Quote Originally Posted by Benji View Post
    I don't even think she is talking about those who put others down about their own birth. She talks about her friend who asked her about her placenta - as if that is an offensive thing to ask And talks about her own plan for her placenta, but Mia basically said she doesn't give a shiz and she should've shut up. There was nothing there to suggest to me that this woman was competing, just telling her her own plans.

    Then she has a dig at those who use the words 'empowerment' and 'control' of THEIR OWN BIRTHS. How dare they - how dare they want to be in control of their own body at their own birth

    If she wrote an article about those who put down others who have a VB or a CS etc I would agree with her.

    But SHE herself is behaving like a 'birthzilla' as she puts it. She isn't having a go at birthzillas, she's having a dig at those who want to have their own birth. And she doesn't give a crap about their birth plan. Again, how dare anybody write down their preferences for how they would like to give birth - they should just be TOLD what to do

    I think she's being offensive and rude.
    Unless of course their birth plan reads; football stadium filled with various doctors staring at my vagina. Get baby out, don't care how you do it. That is acceptable to mia.

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  12. #357
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    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    There is nothing wrong with talking about it, being happy/sad about it, rejoicing in it or whatever, its when certain women look down their noses the way others have birthed that the problem arises.
    if anything ive only had empathy for my experiences. ive never been told 'oh you should have stayed home, then your problems wouldnt have happened'
    just as Im now facing a csection (breech bub and placenta only 1cm clear) my hb/fb friends have been very supportive. and even when i considered an elective due to the past trauma, they were very empathetic, not judgy at all.

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    Quote Originally Posted by NancyBlackett View Post
    Birthzillas ARE women who put the plan above anything else. That's her point.

    I love to hear about other people's birth experiences too. I think the process of birth is vitally important - i'd never minimise it.

    But I don't think HOW someone birthed (vaginal, c/s, freebirth, while dancing on the top of a mountain) defines them as a woman or a mother. And the way I read her piece is that she feels the same way.
    I'm sorry but I don't see where she describes " birthzillas" as putting women who put their plan before everything else. She refers to them as women who have a plan and feel empowered and in control by having that plan.
    She is obviously against birth plans as she refers to setting them alight but her being to critical to those who do have one is very hypocritical.
    Isn't she herself being judgmental to the choices other women make? Yet she doesn't want anyone to judge her or her choices. I don't get that!

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    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    There is nothing wrong with talking about it, being happy/sad about it, rejoicing in it or whatever, its when certain women look down their noses the way others have birthed that the problem arises.
    ffff

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    Quote Originally Posted by Alimia View Post
    At least them being at the hospital you are giving your baby a chance to recieve medical attention if needed.
    If I had my first baby at home, I wouldn't have had an unnecessary c-section under an unnecessary GA and I wouldn't have come close to losing my own life.

    But hey, better not homebirth/freebirth, cause it's totally dangerous and reckless...



    *I can haz typos*


 

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