Thank you all.
I don't talk to the btch anymore, obviously. Last I heard she was alone and miserable.
It's all still quite raw and I've never told anyone the full story, but I do feel a little lighter with this. Virtual hugs definitly somehow make things nicer too
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My sister, who I adore and usually isn't emotionally hopeless, asked me when I was going to get "scraped out" (d& c). I said, oh that's a horrible way of putting it (I was trying to be really brave and not let anyone know how much I was struggling with the mc, I even initially refused to call it a mc, stupid stupid pride) and she said it again 2 minutes later.
It really upset me the insane lack of sensitivity. It still does.
The first thing my sister asked me was if I felt guilty. I thought it was an odd thing to ask. I suppose she was trying to understand what I was feeling.
I have actually been lucky after my miscarriages, I can't remember anyone saying anything particularly bad. I got the whole "well there must have been something wrong with the babies" which didn't help at all, but I understand it was meant well so it didn't upset me as such.
Wow, some of these are awful.
I haven't had anyone say anything awful, a did get the 'something must of been wrong with the baby' and 'you're young, you can try again' etc but i was not offended by these comments as they were said in a nice way and they meant well.
The worst response to a m/c i got was no response at all. My last m/c was ignored by most people i know, everyone knew but they was no asking how i was, no comments at all - this hurt me a lot. I wish someone would have said something, so that it was at least acknowledged it happened iykwim?
Wow, that's awful tulips.
Just thought of another ... when I told my boss I had to have a d&c she said, right, like an abortion. I was gobsmacked. How could you compare me losing a child that we wanted and someone willingly aborting their baby? What an awful person she is!
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One was in reply to a thread on here.. to which they said "I believe things happen for a reason". God I hate it when people say that to bad stuff that happens. I replied to the person telling them they were a tool too!!
First miscarriage - had a d&c, at the follow up with gp 'oh could you not handle the thought of being a mother?' then I had to explain everything to him again (hello read your notes!!)
Second miscarriage, was at dating/viability scan and the tech said 'why are you crying? This is only your second m/c - I've seen women who've had a dozen!'
My boss told me to stop being hormonal and made fun of me for accidentally ticking 'bereavement' instead of 'sick' on my leave form after 2nd m/c 'haha who died?' was what he wanted to know!
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