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  1. #11
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    When i told my mum her response was 'oh really, what a shame'. She then went on to talking about her cats

  2. #12
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    The things that people said after my miscarriage that upset me the most were:

    At least you know IVF works for you.

    It wasn't meant to be.

  3. #13
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    Loving6 that is awful! I hope you made a complaint

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    LoveLivesHere  (18-06-2012)

  5. #14
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    After my still birth my hates were:

    Your baby is better of with god (better than his own mother )

    You were too old any way ( 38)

    Oh well you have other children (we do from previous marriages but not together )

    10 days after his death 3 days after his funeral I should get back to my business im being selfish just sitting out the back of my shop why my workers have family they should be with...


    You have nothing to be missing its not like you made any memories not like I have with my 13 year old daughter, I have 13 years...

    The all time greatest was the midwife as I sobbed "why did this happen " well you are old and obese (95kg @ nearly 37 weeks) and you did ivf. This took the cake until I spoke with Dr and got the reasons 6 months after all tests were done as the shame and guilt almost killed me - suicide was in my thoughts everyday

    Four years later I do not give these people the time of day...

    no one understands unless they have been in our shoes... plain old empathy is no where to be found


    ICSI #1 2008(1 Embryo) -DS Archie Jo(stillborn at 36wks and 5 days)
    ICSI #2 2009(2 Embryo's) 1 Transfered -BFN (1 frozen)
    FET #3 2009 BFN
    ICSI #42009(2 Embryos) 2 Transfered -BFN
    ICSI #52010(2 Embryos) 2 Transfered -BFN
    ICSI #6 2011 May/June 2011 -BFN

    ED 2011 no luck -BFN

    # 8 Here we come

  6. #15
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    By ultrasound tech's boss 'you are young you can try again'. Some people are missing their sensitivity chip and certainly any compassion.

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    bwana  (16-06-2012)

  8. #16
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    Ulysses is offline In the eyes of a child you will see...the world as it should be.
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    the worst for me is that once people know you have had a miscarriage everyone keeps asking if you are pregnant again (soon after the MC). I hated the pressure of everyone wanting me to be pregnant again and asking if we had any luck…it was awful and a constant reminder.

    i think people genuinely want to say something to take your pain away - but in a way for some (me included) i just want to hide away and not talk to anyone about it.

  9. #17
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    "Well, you can be thankful you've already got a child."

    Does having a second child make you any less thankful for your first? Why would losing a baby make me any less thankful for my first?


    I've had four miscarriages, and have worked hard the last few years to educate people that miscarriage is both normal and difficult, and the best thing to say is 'I'm sorry for your loss'.

  10. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Susan Mac For This Useful Post:

    CozWesty  (16-06-2012),Ulysses  (16-06-2012)

  11. #18
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    Oh well, at least you know you can get pregnant.... Yes because passing pieces of my unborn child is so fantastic an experience.

    The usual, it was for a reason blah blah blah

    The ER doctor with my first miscarriage said as he was scanning me that 'oh yes, the uterus is enlarged which is indicative of pregnancy' that made me feel like he hadn't believed I was pregnant. And then he said yes, you've had a 'spontaneous abortion' I very nearly punched him.

    I get that people don't know what to say but really, they should just keep quiet.

    Loving - that person shouldn't have a job. Im so sorry you were treated like that. How awful

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    LoveLivesHere  (18-06-2012)

  13. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by emzluvbub View Post
    Oh well, at least you know you can get pregnant....
    It ain't much good getting pregnant if you can't carry a baby to term! Even if you've had one baby, that may have been a miracle and may not be repeatable.

  14. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Susan Mac For This Useful Post:

    emzluvbub  (16-06-2012),KaraB  (19-01-2014)

  15. #20
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    When i had my ectopic and emergency tubal ligation last year my SIL sent me a message on Facebook...

    My message to her
    i had an ectopic removed on thurs. My right tube ruptured took out my right ovary and they clamped my left because it was too damaged to be left open and functional.


    Her message to me

    • Did you still have the Marina when you fell or did you have that taken out already? At least you won't have to worry about contraception any more, it's nice not to have to think about it. Did you just have key hole surgery? You should be feeling better soon

      I havent spoken to her since.... this was the day i got out of hospital

  16. The Following User Says Thank You to lese82 For This Useful Post:

    KaraB  (19-01-2014)


 

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