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    Default Why are people so cagey about family history records?

    I've been working on a 'new' branch of my family tree this week and am finding it so hard to get names and dates out of family members who have them, others are really weird about copying birth/marriage/death certificates for me so I don't have to pay $30 per certificate for my own copies.

    I'm very giving with the documents and photos I do have, I've spent quite a bit of money getting very old photos restored and digital copies, I've shared these with the same family members who are withholding the info I need.

    Semi vent -- also looking for suggestions for extracting this info from them. Tickle it out of them maybe? They live in another country so that'd be an expensive option.

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    HugsBunny is offline Once upon a time there was a bunny.........
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    My mum had the same issues.

    Turns out it was because someone had had an affair with an aboriginal maid/slave (oh the shame ) or because someone was born out of wedlock. There was quite a bit of embarrassment in the elder folk that most of our descendants came out as convicts - honestly it's not surprising, we ARE Tasmanian LOL.

    Maybe think of the worst possible thing it could be and then tell them you've found out thru blah that 'this' person murdered their parents - it might be more embarrassing than the truth and they'll tell you to save face lol.

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    Yeah Iv found our family history quite shady and confusing my grandfather (passed away now) had a sense of humor and dementia so that was always a blast.... Apparently he had two brothers named john??? Lol and some story of how his father lived to be 102 and he drank all the vodka so they hit him on the head and he died..... Lol

    My grandmother asked if we wanted to see a photo of My dads grandmother and we were all excited an said yeah! She bought this really old photo out of this little old lady... In a casket... Funny side of it though being a very poor family they would only bury the dead in clothes that no one could wear, so the photo is of a tiny tiny little lady with the little scarf around her head and yet these giant army boots lol guess you gotta see the lighter side of it

    We gave up actually sorting our family tree out dam polish people everything ended with drinking so no stories are ever clear
    Hope your endeavor ends better than mine!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bunnyhugs View Post
    My mum had the same issues.

    Turns out it was because someone had had an affair with an aboriginal maid/slave (oh the shame ) or because someone was born out of wedlock. There was quite a bit of embarrassment in the elder folk that most of our descendants came out as convicts - honestly it's not surprising, we ARE Tasmanian LOL.

    Maybe think of the worst possible thing it could be and then tell them you've found out thru blah that 'this' person murdered their parents - it might be more embarrassing than the truth and they'll tell you to save face lol.

    Lol, yeah I had this issue on the Lebanese side, people being all embarrassed about us having family circles instead of family trees. These are people who passed away before my birth, so I don't see the big deal. I'm fairly sure this branch has much less 'shameful' stories (boring huh?).

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    Quote Originally Posted by Koberose View Post
    Yeah Iv found our family history quite shady and confusing my grandfather (passed away now) had a sense of humor and dementia so that was always a blast.... Apparently he had two brothers named john??? Lol and some story of how his father lived to be 102 and he drank all the vodka so they hit him on the head and he died..... Lol

    My grandmother asked if we wanted to see a photo of My dads grandmother and we were all excited an said yeah! She bought this really old photo out of this little old lady... In a casket... Funny side of it though being a very poor family they would only bury the dead in clothes that no one could wear, so the photo is of a tiny tiny little lady with the little scarf around her head and yet these giant army boots lol guess you gotta see the lighter side of it

    We gave up actually sorting our family tree out dam polish people everything ended with drinking so no stories are ever clear
    Hope your endeavor ends better than mine!
    The siblings with the same name is quite common actually, if one died young a sibling born after the death is often given the same name. Makes confirming records a little trickier.

    I haven't come across any momento mori yet, they are creepily fascinating. Our family must've been okay financially, we have quite a few living portraits from the 1800s.

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    My grandmother told me back then their first names of siblings were commonly the same, and they were actually called by their second names. So John Paul and John George, you'd call them Paul and George.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BlissedOut View Post
    The siblings with the same name is quite common actually, if one died young a sibling born after the death is often given the same name. Makes confirming records a little trickier.
    .
    Sorry I missed The bit of info we eventually found out the other "john" what his neighbor who ended up living with them... It was years before we found that out lol


 

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