Definitely keep your doctors appointment. I know you're worried, but they won't judge or consider taking your boys away as you're obviously a great Mum and the parenting side of things is going well for you. They'll just focus on getting YOU better.
I'm not a psychologist, but I know of a few people who've experienced PTSD and/or depression after a medical trauma. Here's a bit of info that I've copied and pasted (I haven't copied the whole list):
Symptoms of PTSD
Good luck Reaching out for help is the hardest part but once you do that, you should (hopefully) get plenty of support to help you through this.
- Avoiding activities, places, thoughts, or feelings that remind you of the trauma
- Inability to remember important aspects of the trauma
- Loss of interest in activities and life in general
- Feeling detached from others and emotionally numb
- Sense of a limited future (you don’t expect to live a normal life span, get married, have a career)
Omg I couldn't stop crying reading your post I really hope things get better for you! Keep going even if it's just for your kids. ::sending you endless love and hugs::
I could feel how much pain you're in, reading that I am so glad you're seeing your gp, but is there anyone you can talk to in the meantime? Your mum? You've been through so much and I'm sure there are people who love you who want nothing more than to help you. Please reach out if you haven't already. I don't even know you and I want to give you a huge hug and tell you it will be ok. Because it will... Not tomorrow, but it will be ok. And you deserve to live and love and be loved. Honestly.
Oh Hun please please please start having your injections again and please try and move your appointment up.Is there someone who can go with you as a support person?
As for FOB you may never get the answers you want, but you will be okay I promise. when I went through a tough time and could not see a light at the end of the tunnel I would listen to Bon Jovi song Saturday Night. It is a song about feeling low, going through tough times but knowing one day you will be like a Saturday night, all happy and full of fun and promise.
You have been through a trauma with your health and counseling for that and the consequences of that will help.
So many people in your life love you, even if you do not feel it, they do.
Huge hugs! I know you don't believe it now but things will get better! Please speak to somebody... Even if you call a counselling line and don't give your name. Once bub arrives you will feel so much love for him and your boys will get you through
You have been through so much in such a short space of time and that is taking its toll on you and is to be expected xx
Thank you all for your replies
I do recognise that I definitely need to get some kind of help...I know this feeling isn't just going to disappear. And if I don't...I'm terrified of what will happen if I get PND on top of whatever I already have.
It's just so scary. I was talking to mum about seeing a counsellor, and she let me know that it will be their duty of care to pass the information onto DOCS because of DS1's age/my gestation. She didn't say it to scare me, but it really did. I really don't know what I would do if I didn't have them, and I'm terrified that if I'm honest about these feelings, then that's what will happen
I don't think he would ever be that nasty/spiteful, but I'm already scared because I've talked to FOB about most of these feelings...I get so anxious that he will use it against me. Like I said, I can't imagine he would ever be that horrible...but I couldn't imagine that this would ever happen either, and it has, so I don't know.
I already feel like that's given him fuel if he ever wants to try and get custody or anything. I just don't know what to do
Oh poor love, everyone is entitled to have times when they are feeling down & out.... times when everything hurts and it feels like whatever is at the end of that tunnel, isn't worth the pain of reaching.
You will reach the end of that tunnel. You will crawl through whatever hell it takes to get you there.... because you are a mother. Not just anyone...... You have strength beyond your knowledge. You are amazing.
You are pregnant, your partner has left you and you also have a young child. No one is going to look at you and think that taking your child away from you is going to help.
Gain strength from knowing that your child & baby need you...... everyone needs their mum. No matter how horrid you feel, you will always be their idol.
We are all proud of you for sharing your feelings and here to help. No one should shoulder such a burden alone
oh sweety, im so sorry for what you have been thru, as everybody says, you WILL get thru it, it just takes time. I honestly think the dr's will help you, you have been thru a tremendous lot in the past while, and it's understandable that you're feeling up and down.. if it makes u feel better, ring a helpline as one of the pp's said, just talking about it and having that someone listen can really help. Your children need you to be strong and healthy, you're their world. Do you have many friends who you can speak to? All the best hun, i really hope things work out well for you.
many hugs nicoletta. im so sorry you are going through this, and so close to your new little mans' birth. noone should have to feel like this, especially a pregnant mumma.
i went thru something similar when pregnant with my daughter, and the people i found to be most supportive were the midwives at my hospital, who also referred me for counseling. BEST thing i ever did!!!
am here if you would like to chat, feel free to msg me anytime x
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