I am just not meant to BF. I've typed this thread 2 TIMES now already and my PC won't let it upload. SO here's for the third time lucky.
My boy was 5 weeks prem and spent 2 weeks in special care being tube fed then bottle fed EBM. Since coming home a week ago we've been expressing and bottle feeding and trying to BF as well.
I've seen 2 LC's who've told me I'm doing everything right. Despite this I am in AGONY and my nipples feel like they're on fire. I cry every time I feed him and I dread it and I hate myself for that. Not sure if this is because my nipples are already damaged but what else can I do? Everyone says not to bottle feed as it causes nipple confusion and perhaps that's the problem but he's so keen to BF and feeds for about 40 mins and sleeps between 3-4 hours each time.
I just don't know what to do, I'm so afraid to feed him next time. I actually cry out in pain and it's distressing my 3 and 4 year old daughters. My son of course must be picking up on my acute discomfort and I'm concerned it will affect my let down and supply.
I'm at a loss. What an EPIC failure I am.