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  1. #81
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    Quote Originally Posted by Neekie View Post
    Babies don't know that we are watching tv or doing dishes silly!

    My babies needs and wants do not ever get pushed aside thank you very much. And it's rude of you to imply that I am.


    I'm seriously appalled with the lack of SUPPORTIVE advice. Yeah I asked a question but I didn't need to be made to feel I was doing the most awful thing in the world.

    Now will you excuse me while I put my crying tired baby to bed, where he will probably cry a little before dozing off after playing with me all morning with his toys.
    I'm not rude nor silly, FYI. I just like to consider my little person's feelings, wants and needs. Personally, I wouldn't ever cry just for the fun of it, which implies that if I cry, I want or need something. Since adults and babies are of the same species, I would assume that our emotional needs are similar, and that if a baby cries, it wants or needs something.

    And yes, you asked the question. These are your replies.

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    majo  (07-06-2012),wrena  (07-06-2012)

  3. #82
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    I also consider my babies feelings.

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    How many children do you have and what's the age gap? How do you put them to sleep? How do you tend to each one without one ever crying?

  5. #84
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    This is such a controversial topic. When I had DS I wouldn't let him whinge. I deliberately put him to bed asleep everytime. I ended up with PND and I think sleep-deprivation was a huge factor. I can't cope with no sleep, and I had a thyroid issue that made it extra tough. I honestly can't remember much of the first 8 months of DS' life and I'm pretty sure he was negatively affected by having a depressed mother. Would he have been negatively affected by being taught to self-settle? (in the way the OP describes, not from full-on CC or anything). I don't think so.

    A friend taught her baby to self-settle by putting him to bed awake and rocking him till he fell asleep - while he cried. At the time I was appalled and very judgemental, but you know her son has slept 12 hours a night since 6 weeks old. He has never appeared to be sleep-deprived, he's happy, his mum is happy and has probably enjoyed that early motherhood time more than I did. My DS has cried so much in my arms from tiredness I think it probably has been bad for him.

    With baby #2 I want to teach it to self-settle. I've talked to loads of women in my mum's generation as to how did they put baby to bed. All of them who had good sleepers put baby down, let them grizzle for a moment or two and if it escalated they went in. My mum did it with me, my MIL did it with DH, my boss did it with her kids.

    Yes I think CC is not great, letting a baby scream until they give up. Leaving a baby in fear or stress until their body shuts down is awful and will affect their attachment and their brain development. This isn't what this thread is about.

    OP I think you are doing a great job.

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  7. #85
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    Quote Originally Posted by Izzys Mummy View Post
    I'm confused. I thought you titled the thread very simply as "is it ok to..."

    Naturally you will get yes or no with the reasons behind it. You didn't ask for other methods.
    Geezus. I'm sure that people could offer other methods if they though into it since I'm doing it so wrong! Lol!

  8. #86
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    Quote Originally Posted by Majestic Hiss View Post
    This is such a controversial topic. When I had DS I wouldn't let him whinge. I deliberately put him to bed asleep everytime. I ended up with PND and I think sleep-deprivation was a huge factor. I can't cope with no sleep, and I had a thyroid issue that made it extra tough. I honestly can't remember much of the first 8 months of DS' life and I'm pretty sure he was negatively affected by having a depressed mother. Would he have been negatively affected by being taught to self-settle? (in the way the OP describes, not from full-on CC or anything). I don't think so.

    A friend taught her baby to self-settle by putting him to bed awake and rocking him till he fell asleep - while he cried. At the time I was appalled and very judgemental, but you know her son has slept 12 hours a night since 6 weeks old. He has never appeared to be sleep-deprived, he's happy, his mum is happy and has probably enjoyed that early motherhood time more than I did. My DS has cried so much in my arms from tiredness I think it probably has been bad for him.

    With baby #2 I want to teach it to self-settle. I've talked to loads of women in my mum's generation as to how did they put baby to bed. All of them who had good sleepers put baby down, let them grizzle for a moment or two and if it escalated they went in. My mum did it with me, my MIL did it with DH, my boss did it with her kids.

    Yes I think CC is not great, letting a baby scream until they give up. Leaving a baby in fear or stress until their body shuts down is awful and will affect their attachment and their brain development. This isn't what this thread is about.

    OP I think you are doing a great job.
    This is exactly what I expected to hear. I would never ignore my baby's screams I couldn't, if he does i go get him. I was taught the same way and I'm perfectly fine.

    Thank you!!

  9. #87
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    Neekie how long is your baby up between sleeps during the day? I found DS is more harder to settle when he is over tired.

  10. #88
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    Neekie you sound like such a caring and committed mummy! If you didn't care about your baby you wouldn't be trying to work out what was best for them! I truly believe in doing what is best for you and your family and we all do things differently. We should try to support one another this parenting is a tough gig!!! I really believe that a happy mummy equals a happy baby. I can clearly see that you want what's best for your bubba and I hope you can find what works for you. All the best xxx

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    neekie - you can ask to have a thread closed if you want so nobody else can reply

    Sent from my GT-I9300 using BubHub

  12. #90
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    Quote Originally Posted by biscotti View Post
    Pretty normal I'd say for a 6 mth old to be waking for a a feed. Desirable even. They have such small tummies
    I disagree... Assuming bub was a healthy size when born they should be capable of sleeping through at 6 months. It's certainly not normal to wake 5+ times per night. If a healthy sized 6 month older is waking that is sign that something is wrong (cold, hungry, been trained to wake up, medical issue etc).


 

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