+ Reply to Thread
Page 4 of 14 FirstFirst ... 23456 ... LastLast
Results 31 to 40 of 132
  1. #31
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Brisbane North
    Posts
    4,460
    Thanks
    1,581
    Thanked
    1,802
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I do sometimes... unless they get hysterical.. Obviously there are different types of cries, but seriously, if I had to keep going back and forth every few minutes they would never fall asleep.. as for back patting, then they just want to play.

    Everyone does and doesn't do things we all agree/disagree on..

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to GlitterFarts For This Useful Post:

    Kiplusthree  (06-06-2012)

  3. #32
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Glen Waverley
    Posts
    669
    Thanks
    523
    Thanked
    279
    Reviews
    10
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by donniesweet View Post
    Uneducated question here but I just wanted to hear the responses. Why isn't it okay to let them cry to sleep?

    Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using BubHub
    IMhO and that of the Special Care Nurses at the baby unit where my child was for a month when born due to health issues (and who taught me loads about baby body language and appropriate responses), a baby cries to tell you something. That something may be 'I'm hot, I'm cold, tired, hungry, wet, dirty, in pain, gassy, teething, uncomfortable; I have a tight piece of clothing/a fold in my bedding preventing me from getting comfy, I want Mum/Dad to comfort me/merely be present; any number of things could be preventing bubs from settling down. In summary ~ Bubs cries because of a need which can be met, discomfort (which needs to be eliminated), tiredness (which can be comforted, even if not able to be alleviated) or to communicate their want for comforting or parental presence.

    Bubs of this age (6mo) are still too young to fully understand 'object permenance' ~ that things which are not within their sight still exist (this is what makes peekaboo so amazing to little ones). So if Mum or Dad aren't in Bub's sight, space or senses, it's reasonable to assume Bubs thinks you have disappeared ~ perhaps permenantly.

    So quick comforting of your bub leads to less crying as bub feels more secure, and safe in knowing that their parents are always 'there'.

    The theory as I see it goes ~ the faster you are to assess your bub's needs and comfort their distress, the safer and more secure your bub becomes in the knowledge that their needs will be met and their distress comforted in the future, therefore less crying and distress will ensue.

    Hope this explains things a bit.

  4. The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to BaronessM For This Useful Post:

    bugalugsmel  (08-06-2012),Lillynix  (07-06-2012),majo  (06-06-2012),MamaC  (06-06-2012),MissMuppet  (06-06-2012),Mod-Myztik  (06-06-2012),peanutmonkey  (07-06-2012),saxonrose  (07-06-2012),share a book  (06-06-2012),smallpotatoes  (07-06-2012),trishalishous  (06-06-2012)

  5. #33
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Adelaide
    Posts
    791
    Thanks
    18
    Thanked
    182
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Thank you for all the replies, I'm feeling a little more confident about leaving him though.

    I would never leave him crying hysterically, some nights he will cry and sook and nights like tonight he babbles and cooes and winged a little till I went in and put his glow worm on and put his dummy in, now he's fast asleep, sometimes he will go straight to sleep and others cry.

    So what I'm getting from all this is asking as he isn't distressed and I am comfortable with his type of cry/ winging that I shouldn't feel bad. As long as he knows I'm there and that I'll come that's all that matters?

  6. #34
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    3,198
    Thanks
    213
    Thanked
    1,063
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by BaronessM View Post
    IMhO and that of the Special Care Nurses at the baby unit where my child was for a month when born due to health issues (and who taught me loads about baby body language and appropriate responses), a baby cries to tell you something. That something may be 'I'm hot, I'm cold, tired, hungry, wet, dirty, in pain, gassy, teething, uncomfortable; I have a tight piece of clothing/a fold in my bedding preventing me from getting comfy, I want Mum/Dad to comfort me/merely be present; any number of things could be preventing bubs from settling down. In summary ~ Bubs cries because of a need which can be met, discomfort (which needs to be eliminated), tiredness (which can be comforted, even if not able to be alleviated) or to communicate their want for comforting or parental presence.

    Bubs of this age (6mo) are still too young to fully understand 'object permenance' ~ that things which are not within their sight still exist (this is what makes peekaboo so amazing to little ones). So if Mum or Dad aren't in Bub's sight, space or senses, it's reasonable to assume Bubs thinks you have disappeared ~ perhaps permenantly.

    So quick comforting of your bub leads to less crying as bub feels more secure, and safe in knowing that their parents are always 'there'.

    The theory as I see it goes ~ the faster you are to assess your bub's needs and comfort their distress, the safer and more secure your bub becomes in the knowledge that their needs will be met and their distress comforted in the future, therefore less crying and distress will ensue.

    Hope this explains things a bit.
    This.

    We never leave DS to cry (which is rare now he's 2.5) for any more time than it takes for me or DH to get from downstairs to his room.

  7. #35
    Guest Guest
    Yep exactly. It sounds like you're following your instincts and know you're baby

  8. #36
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    South Adelaide
    Posts
    3,457
    Thanks
    87
    Thanked
    416
    Reviews
    4
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    No, I don't think it's ok for a child of ANY age to cry themselves to sleep. I cried myself to sleep all through my childhood, I remember it, I hated it!


    ---------
    Mummie to
    Lucy Alys (July '06)
    Minnie Audrey (July '09)
    Pippi Violet (oct '11)

  9. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to shinebrite For This Useful Post:

    AllYouNeedIsLove  (07-06-2012),Etienne  (06-06-2012),majo  (06-06-2012)

  10. #37
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Posts
    6,372
    Thanks
    422
    Thanked
    1,168
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Neekie View Post
    Thank you for all the replies, I'm feeling a little more confident about leaving him though.

    I would never leave him crying hysterically, some nights he will cry and sook and nights like tonight he babbles and cooes and winged a little till I went in and put his glow worm on and put his dummy in, now he's fast asleep, sometimes he will go straight to sleep and others cry.

    So what I'm getting from all this is asking as he isn't distressed and I am comfortable with his type of cry/ winging that I shouldn't feel bad. As long as he knows I'm there and that I'll come that's all that matters?
    Nope. Many people on bubhub will not agree with what you are doing. But YOU are in charge, not them. Do what you can, be as responsive as you can be and don't worry if some people on the internet disagree with you. I used to never beleive in leaving a baby to whinge.. I'm educated, have read a lot about this issue and came to a decision which works for my family. There is no perfect formula for being a good mother.. best of luck

    Sent from my HTC Desire S using BubHub

  11. #38
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    8,794
    Thanks
    3,395
    Thanked
    3,081
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I wouldn't. None of us would like to, so why leave an infant alone crying to sleep? No, I would not do it.

  12. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to share a book For This Useful Post:

    majo  (06-06-2012),trishalishous  (06-06-2012)

  13. #39
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    547
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    268
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Neekie View Post
    ok so, his cry is between both a wing and a real cry, if i leave him he will ALWAYS fall asleep, i am so conflicted with what I'm getting in response, my 7 year old cried himself to sleep and is fine now, and sleeps well, and has no attachment problems.

    To the mums who don't agree on letting the baby cry, do you mean i should be holding my baby till he falls asleep? every time?
    You sound like a great mum!!! I would always leave them go for a whinge cry but go in if things amped up

    I would keep doing what you are doing!

    I could never cuddle my kids to sleep (I find it so strange when people say they do this - I've got more than one child, a hell of a lot of work goes with that I can't nurse a baby all day!!)

  14. #40
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    547
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    268
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Neekie View Post
    Thank you for all the replies, I'm feeling a little more confident about leaving him though.

    I would never leave him crying hysterically, some nights he will cry and sook and nights like tonight he babbles and cooes and winged a little till I went in and put his glow worm on and put his dummy in, now he's fast asleep, sometimes he will go straight to sleep and others cry.

    So what I'm getting from all this is asking as he isn't distressed and I am comfortable with his type of cry/ winging that I shouldn't feel bad. As long as he knows I'm there and that I'll come that's all that matters?
    IMO yes he will know you are there if he really needs you.

    Just curious ... Have you tried putting him in bed 5-10 mins sooner so he is a little less overtired??

    (not directed at op) I don't understand why people are so terrified to let their kids soothe themselves to sleep??? I'm not talking about a hysterical baby.


 

Similar Threads

  1. 6 month old day sleep
    By Lissy12 in forum General Sleeping & Settling Chat
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 23-07-2012, 07:10
  2. 10 Month old sleep HELP!
    By alliemc69 in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 22-05-2012, 09:10
  3. 18 month old day sleep
    By misscheekysmum in forum General Sleeping & Settling Chat
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 02-03-2012, 19:08

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Shapland Swim Schools
Shapland's at participating schools offer free baby orientation classes once a month - no cost no catches. Your baby will be introduced to our "natural effects" orientation program develop by Shapland's over 3 generations, its gentle and enjoyable.
sales & new stuffsee all
CarmelsBeautySecrets
Growing your own natural nails is easy. Years ago, I devised a simple and very effective technique which really helps boosts the nails' growth in as little as three days! And most importantly keeps them that way.
featured supporter
HuggleBib
The HuggleBib is not "just another" baby bib. Sure, your child may be a messy eater who gets more food ON them rather than IN them, so you dread cleaning after feeding times! Well the HuggleBib is THE best solution to help with all these daily tasks!
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!