No point really to this post just, i'm just sick of my friends comments:
I had a D&C last Wednesday, I have 2 other children so i should be happy with what i have right....thats what everone keeps saying, Maybe its a good thing you lost it now rather then at term, How can you be attached to it so early, maybe it was gods plan, maybe its better that its gone rather then have a disabled child, my mum said its not like you were very far along and that i should get over it it hasn't even been a week, i find these comments really hurtful, exspecially my mums, i don't want to talk to any of my friends anymore or my mum for that matter.
They say be happy with what you have, i am happy i love my children more then anything, all my children including the one i lost, i am sad for the baby i lost, I find myself thinking about it constantly would it have been a he or a she, what would baby have looked like, interest, etc.
They seem to have no idea that their comments are nasty i haven't told them this but surely they should understand.....I don't want to talk to any of friends anymore other then 1 that has been nothing but supportive. Is that irrational and unfair to think this way? Did anyone else find this?
Then there comes the facebook issue, I am sick of seeing all the scans, babyshower plans and .........is 31weeks baby is this big and its doing this. I feel like a bad person i have lots of friends and family who are exspecting atm, i am happy for them but find the constant reminder.........i hate facebook.
Then there comes the comments are you going to try again, and this morning my uncle said you have your 2 girls when are you going to have some boys......they have no idea of the m/c i held it together but it hurts and its something i don't know the answer to.
I am feeling rather confused I can not descide what i want to do............... I deperately want another baby and the sooner the better...............but at the same time it my worst fear. I change my mind on a daily basis, I stopped bleeding yesterday and the doctor said we could try whenever the bleeding stopped, and since we can not descide we are just seeing what happens, so i guess we are try but no hard? I wonder if i will ever get over these feeling. Should i even be mad at my friends?
I had genetic testing done. Should i find out te gender do you think that would make it easier or harder?