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  1. #71
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    I hate skinny-hate too.

    I dislike those "When did THIS (pic of Twiggy body types), become sexier than THIS (pic of curvier women from the 50s)," or whatever. ****es me off. Both can be sexy in their own right. No one side needs to be dragged down in order for the other to be "better."

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  3. #72
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    I have only ever been skinny so i have no idea how differently i may be treated if i was overweight. I encounter both rude and nice people all the time, in fact sometimes the rudeness is directed at my weight.
    DH has fluctuated in weight, from skinny to quite overweight, and he encounters more nice people than i do - this has never changed with his different sizes. He is one of those people who everyone seems to instantly like, whereas i seem to be harder to warm to (i think i have chronic b1tch face or something).

    I think everyone judges and unfortunately overweight people are judged more than skinny people because skinny is seen as a more 'ideal' size in society, in general. It's other factors as well that changes how nicely you are treated also imo (like how you dress, your skin colour and even things like whether you smile or not).

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  5. #73
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    I've read every post here and I'm still of the belief it is to do with how much we love ourselves. (not necessarily if you're feeling confident or are bubbly etc) and I still don't think it is a conscious reaction from others. (in most cases.)

    And I thought about it this arvy and I have encountered a great deal of nastiness and bullying both at school and in the work place and some of the worst offenders have been those who are overweight (in an obvious way).

    (I weigh 52kg and I have been this weight for as long as I've been an adult and I'm 35). (apart from pregnancy of course)

    I was reading all these 'skinny scare' articles in a mag yesterday and they had photos of women who weigh the same as me looking all skeletal and boney and I don't look like that yet "oooh oooh this person is only 54kg!"

    In my experience (as described above) a lot of the overweight people in my life have definate issues with self-love and some to the extent where it makes them feel better to make me feel like dirt.

    I don't treat people differently according to weight, but if you are an angry looking person with a scowl on your face casting daggers at me I'm going to avoid you no matter who you are.

  6. #74
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    Zombie_eyes is offline Formerly Diamondeyes
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    Lol never in my life have i ragged on a thin person, if ive ever purposefully looked at a thin person its with 'wow she looks lovely id love to look like that...' kind of admiration.


    Lolol so all fat people are angry and hateful now? And thats why they deserve to be treated like dirt.

    Now ive heard it all. Im gonna bow out of this thread now, before i start saying what i really think.

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  8. #75
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    As a small person (size 6/7) people always think that I'm a snob or are intimidated and don't talk to me because I don't talk to them when in actual fact I'm just REALLY shy. When I was pregnant however I found everyone really nice to me.
    I don't think people should be treated differently because of their weight but I do think everyone should aim to be healthy within their own body. If you feel great at 70+kgs then that is fantastic
    I am really short and thankfully have good genetics even when I am really lazy I don't get above 55kgs. I'm still young though so who knows one day I might have to work harder.

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    Quote Originally Posted by DiamondEyes View Post
    Im not offended. Some people dream of being 70kilos, and to come from a place WAY over 100kgs, saying its not enough is blardy harsh.
    I thought I would let you know that it is true. There is no way I could be 70 kgs. Honestly it is not even a dream that I have. I was told to aim for 100kgs. That would be good weight for me by my dietitian and weight management gp and my surgeon.

    I know that I wasn't in the category as most of you that have lost weight so maybe my perspective is a little different. Blind Freddy could see how people treated me different. Even now if I tell someone what my weight was before they don't believe me. You see the disgust in peoples eyes and often they will come straight out and say to me, my hubby or my kids.

  10. #77
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    Please don't get me wrong - I am not saying skinny people are nice to me now, and before they were all jerks.

    People of ALL DIFFERENT SIZES are nicer to me now. Not everyone is nice as pie... some are still jerks... but OVERALL... instead of most people being either "meh" to me, or rude to me... now, most people are nice or at least a bit nicer than "meh" since I've lost weight.

    Fat people AND skinny people and people in between can be jerks. I'm sure both fat and skinny and inbetween people cop jerk behaviour from others too. I'm not trying to say, "Skinny people are so lucky... EVERYONE is nice to them all the time!" I'm simply saying that since losing weight, I've noticed a MASSIVE shift towards positivity and kindness aimed at me, as compared to before.

    As for self-love, there is no more of that going on. I still pick at myself and find things to hate. Losing weight doesn't solve the fact you have an effed up mindset... so my loss hasn't made me finally accept who I am and love myself. Of course I have moments where I think I look pretty good... but this happened even when I was fatter.

    Jen, you look amazing too. People who treat you like you matter now, whereas before they treated you like scum... are scum themselves.

    That's kind of what I mean though - I get really angry that people do that. That suddenly, simply by losing weight, you're worthy of respect and kindness that you previously weren't. It's pathetic and unfair and it really angers me. It's a conflicting feeling though, because while I loathe it, obviously I do like being treated better... but I HATE that all it's taken for people to actually treat me nicely is for me to have lost weight. It's so wrong... and sometimes, it makes me want to slap people. Scream, "I'M THE SAME AS I WAS BEFORE YOU JERK!" and ask them why I was not worthy of consideration back then.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MothersMilk View Post
    I have only ever been skinny so i have no idea how differently i may be treated if i was overweight. I encounter both rude and nice people all the time, in fact sometimes the rudeness is directed at my weight.
    DH has fluctuated in weight, from skinny to quite overweight, and he encounters more nice people than i do - this has never changed with his different sizes. He is one of those people who everyone seems to instantly like, whereas i seem to be harder to warm to (i think i have chronic b1tch face or something).
    No, it probably has more to do with the fact you look like a model!
    Quote Originally Posted by DiamondEyes View Post
    Lol never in my life have i ragged on a thin person, if ive ever purposefully looked at a thin person its with 'wow she looks lovely id love to look like that...' kind of admiration.


    Lolol so all fat people are angry and hateful now? And thats why they deserve to be treated like dirt.

    Now ive heard it all. Im gonna bow out of this thread now, before i start saying what i really think.
    Not what I said or ment at all. I have personally had very hurtful things said to me about my weight because I'm "small". My feelings aren't less valid. As Sassy said there's posters and quotes promoting hate toward thin women..

    I haven't seen anybody say that large people deserve to be treated like dirt. I'm horrified tht Sassy is finding that she is being treated differently just for losing weight. She's still the same Sassy!

    ETA: just saw the reaponse people are upset about. My apologies
    Last edited by Benji; 03-06-2012 at 20:52.

  12. #79
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    I must say I literally laugh out loud when a naturally thin person says that an overweight person should 'just' lose weight. Just as I lol when a person who gains weight too easily tells an underweight person to 'just' gain weight. The lack of understanding is just astounding.

    This is what I like about bubhub. I get to know and like people before I even know what they look like, if they're fat or skinny it doesn't matter one bit.

  13. #80
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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    I find that I'm more friendly and outgoing when I'm happy with my weight, and I assume that encourages people to be more friendly in return. My baby is nearly 9 months old and I still have 17kg to lose (I put on 28 this pregnancy). Whereas I'm usually quite outgoing, I am now incredibly shy with the mums at school, I don't make much eye contact with people in shops, I don't like going out anywhere nice because I refuse to buy nice clothes in this size... I'd really just like to disappear until I look like myself again.

    I'm not trying to suggest your theory isn't correct, but in my case I would have to assume much of what I encounter from others is heavily influenced by my lack of encouragement.

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