Thanks everyone for replying
Well she - in my opinion anyway had no excuse for the way she behaved. She had a wonderful mother who was always there with her. The complete opposite of how my mum is with me. My grandmother practically raised us when we were young... Mum was there but 'not there' - if you know what I mean. The best I can come up with is maybe she suffered depression along with other things.
And absolutely .... I make a point of being the complete opposite to her. In every way