Things your partner have said that still haunts you?

**bellieellie** · 31-05-2012 00:59

Mine are "you love me more than I love you" and I'm not sure if I'm in love with you because I thought being in love I would want to do more things for you" I'm his first relationship. He said these in the first years of our relationship. This year will be our sixth and these words still haunt me.i wonder if he just "settled" with me.

**FlipFlop** · 31-05-2012 05:38

When I wanted to talk to someone about DS's sleep issues when he was 6 months old and possibly attend sleep school as I could barely function, my 'lovely', 'supportive' DH told me that he would consider me a failure as a mother if I couldn't fix the situation myself

He has since apologised - many times, but it still hurts me very much.

**jennibear** · 31-05-2012 09:23

I was 4 days oversure with my second baby. We had a platgroup xmas party on at a farm school for my DD (2 yo). I asked my DH to take DD to the xmas party so i could have a rest. He said to me 'you take her so I can have some alone time'

It took me almost 2 years to be able to go back the the farm and if i think about it too much i still get very sad!!!!

**something** · 31-05-2012 09:32

I gained weight after having a baby and he said "I'm not attracted to you anymore."

**Bennos Mummy** · 31-05-2012 09:45

I was always fighting with ExDP to spend time with us (me and DS) and how i used my weekends (my days off because i worked) to do washing and cleaning instead of being about to spend it with my son.

As i was packing my stuff to move out he said to me "i did a load of my work clothes last night no problems at all....why are you the only mother who cant cope??" OF course i knew it was easy because he didnt have a crawling toddler tugging on his leg wanting to play and other household duties waiting but those words broke my heart, just him thinking that i wasnt coping. And that he still didnt 'get' my point.

Another he said while fighting infront of his mother. ExMIL said "stay home and spend time with your wife (we weren't married) and child" he said "she's not my wife, she's the b!tch who had my child"

Last one was in our last stint together. We'd got back together after 6 months apart and after falling into the same problems i asked why we even got back together and he said "I dont know, but i've not wanted to be with you for about 4 months now"

My heart is breaking just typing them out

**Missemzy** · 31-05-2012 10:10

Dp 6months ago got offered to go to paris for 6months to train to be apart of the worlds largest oil ship for Shell.

This ship he has had his eye on for a long time and really wants to be apart of it.

But when they told him he has to train in Paris for 6months and then move to Broom and they would pay for us all to go etc etc he told them no.

Then he had the nerve to come home tell me about it and I told him to go for it he cant miss a opportunity like this. Then he told me he said no to to going and he said "if I was single and didn't have you and the girls I would go no questions asked"

Felt so guilty and have ever since.

**Bonkers** · 31-05-2012 12:13

my ex when dp and i had split for a while (i dated a few people in that time) decided he didnt wanna see me anymore because "he had never been with a bigger girl before" i got so angry and said back well your not to good looking you know, specially with those warts of yours.... i was very understanding about them but was very very careful and it helped we never did the deed. but i cant believe he had the nerve to say that to me, then i hung up on him, and a few days went by and i get a txt saying why arnt you talking to me.... W T F

**KnockKnockPenny** · 31-05-2012 09:29

My ExDP once told me I had it easy growing up because I had both of my parents (hers were separated). Yes, my dad worked from dawn til dusk every single day, I worked on the farm everyday in addition to doing all the housework and cooking for our family of 5 from about age 12 as mum was also working on farm or helping dad....totally awesome upbringing

But the worst was when she told me (after 12 months of TTC) that she didn't even want kids anyway now so she was glad it had never worked....nearly killed me and it still hurts even though I'm perfectly happy with my DP. It made me very worried about ever having kids with anyone. Good thing DP is a midwife and I know she loves kids :-) and I trust her completely so yay!

**Meld85** · 31-05-2012 09:40

Originally Posted by KnockKnockPenny

My ExDP once told me I had it easy growing up because I had both of my parents (hers were separated). Yes, my dad worked from dawn til dusk every single day, I worked on the farm everyday in addition to doing all the housework and cooking for our family of 5 from about age 12 as mum was also working on farm or helping dad....totally awesome upbringing

But the worst was when she told me (after 12 months of TTC) that she didn't even want kids anyway now so she was glad it had never worked....nearly killed me and it still hurts even though I'm perfectly happy with my DP. It made me very worried about ever having kids with anyone. Good thing DP is a midwife and I know she loves kids :-) and I trust her completely so yay!

I would be devastated if my other half ever said that as like you I have always wanted kids. Seriously it has always been a deal breaker.

This is going to sound a bit trivial against all of your stories however one night I was 7 months pregnant and in bed with DH, and he was talking how he had a friend who had just brought a house and new holden ute.

He said 'look at me. Living with your mum driving your sh***y Astra' He just said it so sadly and I cried on and off probably the last 2 months of my pregnancy. I just was so happy to be having our baby and felt he was so unhappy with our life.

Afterwards he said a few times he did not mean it and was just disappointed his mate was doing so well compared to him but I still think about it and it tears me up.

**DewDanni** · 31-05-2012 09:34

Some of these are making tears well up in my eyes

My husband said not long ago that if we ever separate, no-one will ever love me as much as he does.. I'm sure he meant it as in because he loves me so much, but I can't help but wonder if it's because I'm so difficult?