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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by momtobe21 View Post
    My parents live overseas. So after reading all these posts I think what we will do is see how I cope after DH goes back to work. If I'm finding it 'impossible' to cope I will then ask them to come.
    Please remember that your parents will want to meet and spend time with their grandchild too. It is certainly not more important than your needs, but my parents live interstate, and it was really important for my mum that she be here for the birth and the first few weeks (but my mum is awesome and did all the housework etc and didn't get in the way at all, so wasn't an issue).
    I found that I needed more help when bub no.2 came along, really to entertain bub no.1. When I just had the one baby, wasn't too bad, maybe a bit boring to be on my own!

  2. #22
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    I had no one help, My partner of the time was home for 6 weeks, and refused to do anything to help, I did all the cooking, cleaning, feeding etc, of the whole house and my daughter. You dont need it tbh

  3. #23
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    When my dd was born (bub #2 for me) hubby was back at work ... 1 week later, working 60+ hrs wk - just me, newborn & 18 mo ds at home. Had no help with cooking, cleaning, washing . And I managed really well with no help; I was just super organized and would get 8-10 hrs sleep at night (altho I went to bed when ds did at 7 and my wake up time was 7 when he woke up).
    BUT if you have someone who is prepared to come and help you say YES!!!!!! Let them take care of the crap house stuff while you focus on baby and rest.
    I never understood the real meaning of the words sleep deprivation until I had a baby ... I was amazed at my ability to push through (I think everyone does it). Ds is now 4, dd is 2 1/2 - I am still always sleep deprived lol.
    Good luck honey - take the help but maybe just lay down the ground rules first xxx

  4. #24
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    Nope! With both babies I had them in hospital, went home the next day, my DH went back to work, and I took care of them by myself.
    I'm not sure why you would need help from your parents, maybe to cook meals? Mikayla was attached to me feeding pretty much non stop for the first few weeks, so getting stuff done was a little tricky, but they do sleep a LOT as well You'll be fine

  5. #25
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    Yup....I did. Different scenario as I had twins, so my parents stayed with our family for about 3 months. My DH had no time off work at all. I couldn't have done it without them. They are 16mths now, and we still get alot of help. They are both terrible sleepers, so it has been wonderful to have an extra pair of hands around. I would have lost mind without them. It has been to the betterment of my twins, and the relationship that is growing between grandchild/grandparent is beautiful.

    Knowing what I know now, if I had a singleton, I would be fine on my own.

  6. #26
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    I've got 4 kids and never had anyone come stay to help. god i couldnt think of anything worse! my Dh takes 2/3 weeks off and we have been fine so much easier without "help" i reckon. its all boobs out trying to feed, pad changing, embarrassing stuff anyway who wants someone there for that! not me lol

    Sent from my GT-I9000 using BubHub

  7. #27
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    My mum came from overseas and stayed for 3 weeks. I wish she could be here forever, but dad needs her too! My dad didn't come as he thought he would be bored to death (I had landscaping plans for him so that didn't get done ). Mum was good, she's not overly intrusive, basically she cooked us meals and did some tidying up. I get a cleaner in to do the rest, DH did the laundry and the older kids did the kitchen clean up. My mum pretty much went to rest in her room after dinner. We have a pretty big house and she's on a different floor with the older kids. DH also stayed with me in hospital so she also kept an eye on the older kids and cooked for them. Mum even got me breakfast while she was here and watched baby when I have my shower or have my nap or rocked baby to sleep when my hands had enough. Before she left she also cooked a bit more and put them in the freezer. Mum was a godsend!

  8. #28
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    I've heard that apparently my DH gramdmother is coming to stay, but to 100% sure. I haven't been asked just been told that gma is coming down to stay when bub is born. Truthfully, I don't want anyone here. I lived with mum when I had my DS, but that was different. I love gma but I don't want her here for a couple of weeks.

  9. #29
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    Personally, I would not recommend having anyone stay when you come home with a new bub, even if they are your own parents Those early weeks are really a whirlwind and you could be up and down to bub every 2 hours day and night before feeding spreads out and some sort of 'routine' can occur. Having other people in the house at this time could be difficult, especially if you would have to look after them as guests as well. I would leave it til bubs is a bit older, and even then, would favour organised visits during the day, rather than having live-in guests. It is difficult as they live overseas and organising these things can be hard, and often people have different expectations... I think you need to do what feels right for you here. All the best

  10. #30
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    Whew, glad of some of the replies here. My partner will be there for the first two weeks and then I'm on my own! Good thread mum2b21. My folks live overseas too.... but I can really imagine I just need my own space to figure it all out. Different case if I had a toddler or two running around though I imagine.


 

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