A bit of background info: DH used to have a lot of female friends before/when we first got together. Slowly, they ended up falling off the face of the Earth as he got into more "masculine" hobbies. Fastrack a few years and he mostly has male mates and is also friends with their female partners/wives.
Last year when he had an accident and had to take a few weeks off work, he would hang out with a SAHM neighbour of ours who we were quite close to (she had looked after our DS a couple of days a week while I worked, DH would pick him up after work and they'd often have a beer and a chat). I started getting a bit jealous of their friendship, and we had an arguement or two about it, but nothing serious.
She has since split up with her partner (this may or may not be important info!)
The other night DH suggested we go and have a cuddle in bed after DS had gone to bed. As we were getting up, he got a text message. I went to go get his phone but he pounced on it and wouldn't let me read it. He ended up saying it was this female friend, and they were having a private conversation. Of course, I instantly got sh*tty as! He explained that she is just easy to talk to and was just having a general chat with her. I asked why I couldn't read what they'd said - I can't remember exactly what he said, but he pointed out that I have friends/family I can "talk" to, and he cant "talk" to his male friends, so he was doing so with her.
I asked him why he doesn't "talk" to me, and he said some things you want to talk to friends about, not your wife. I got SUPER offended - that really cut deep that I'm supposed to be his number one, yet there's some other woman who gets to hear a side of him that I don't.
So... am I overreacting because she's female, not male? Do I have the right to be upset that he doesn't share some of his thoughts/feelings with me, his wife? For the record, I don't think they're having an affair or anything, I guess I'm just jealous that he can confide in her with things he can't confide in me with. But then again, do I do that with my friends too, and it only bothers me because he is male and she is female?!?!!
The even stupider (?) part is that now I feel like I don't want to share all of myself with him in retalliation. Not only that, I fear that I must pay attention to all the crap he waffles about his hobbies, because if I'm disinterested then he's less inclided to talk to me about stuff.
GGAAHH!! Thanks for letting me vent a bit!! Sorry if there's any type-os in here, I'm typing quickly so he doesn't see that he's being posted about!