ASD or something else?

[MunchkinsMum1]

Calling on collective wisdom of forum!
11 yo DSD recently diagnosed with Aspergers (pediatrician, speech pathologist and educational pysch). No issues with diagnosis as such because there is something preventing her from reaching full potential. But, from my reading on and experience with ASD, I and hubby, don't agree that it is Aspergers.

Background: diagnosis was done without the professionals having any knowledge that DSD spends 50% of her time in our household (shared custody). So our observations about her were not included in any testing or discussion. The report we were begrudgingly given by her mum has elements in it that we disagree with (ie. talking about behaviors we have never seen). We went this week and completed the pragmatic language survey with speech pathologist. we have also written letter to pead outlining what we see.

In my experience, people within the ASD have issues interacting with others. DSD is a little shy, but has friends, goes over to their places, sleepovers etc; plays sport, has joined school choir and is participating in a mass school performance (volunteered for it). Yes, she does move between friendship groups but teenage girls do that. She interacts with young kids, adults, can read body language and tone quite well.

She is 12-24 months behind in English and Maths but quite talented in sport. We know there is something preventing her from comprehending and retaining information and we want to get to the bottom of it to help her.

But we, despite the professionals' input, don't agree with diagnosis, particularly considering half her life was ignored when it was made.

Whatever the final diagnosis is we will do everything we can to help her.

So, what I guess I'm asking is: does what I've described sound like ASD or am I letting my dislike of her mum and her actions block me from agreeing with diagnosis?

TIA

[beebs]

Not always, sometimes kids on the ASD can be loving, cuddly and interact with others fine. Or sometimes they interact quite well but don't seem to know boundaries, like sometimes they can be overly friendly, cuddly etc.

There are just so many different variables.

Having said that - if you are having thoughts that the diag is wrong, has she been tested for anything else?

[Opaque]

Just putting it out there.... But just be mindful that your DSD may be one way with you & dh & one way with her biological mother.

My DS has aspergers & at daycare he has never had a melt down. The only thing they flagged in his reports were his social interactions & he has HEAPS of friends but just certain little things he did while socializing etc. so at daycare he is pretty much an angel.

My olds & my IL's can have him & he'll occasionally "loose his ****" but overall minimally.

BUT get him home where he is comfortable & all these feelings he's been bottling up come EXPLODING out!!!! Maybe this maybe why you are seeing different things.

I have a friend who's boy has aspergers too. If I babysit him, he is a perfect angel but for his parents he flips out.

I think of it like how we as adults are, of something happened that upset us majorly down the shops etc we would be more inclined to hold it together & then "loose our ****" in the comfort of our own home.

Just my thoughts. Good luck!!!

[MunchkinsMum1]

Thanks for that. We do know that both her and her sister behave differently with us and their mum. Our main concern was that our insights were completely and deliberately excluded from the assessment. And the primary focus is the welfare of the girls. We're not going to fight a battle but look at the situation and find out more information so we can help her (regardless of our thoughts on the whole process).
Thanks again

[Happy2be3]

Mothers usually know best...and if that's what all the therapists believe then...... Besides.. Diagnosis of Aspergers will help not hinder her :-)

***Sent from my phone***

[twotrunks]

Our experience with the diagnosis was that our reports were only a fairly small part of it... If your DVD has been through the process with paed, psych, speech etc then I would think they rprobably know what they are doing. Asperger's in girls presents very differently than in boys,and doesn't look at all like the stereotype of an asd. Eg. Girls are very good at mimicking social behaviour and therefore have friends etc. I really think the fact what you guys weren't involved is concerning, but I wouldn't doubt a professional diagnosis. Maybe do some major reading on girls and asperger's and the different presentation.