Take sex off the table for awhile, but concentrate on intimate time together with no pressure for it to go further.
For me, the biggest turnoff was the expectation of sex. But without the expectation, intimacy could bring feelings of desire. (However if not the intimacy could be enjoyed without any sex.)
The other thing for me is that I didn't want sex when going to bed. My ideal time would be to sleep first and get some rest, then wake up early and that would be the time that sex (or just intimacy) could be desirable. (I think this might be a conflict between genders, with men preferring sex before sleep and women preferring it after, but I could be wrong there. I don't know of any studies into the concept.)