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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by hopefully2 View Post
    I also want to know how people dealt with the awkward times people visited and you were trying to get baby to latch. I really wish I could have no family or friends visit just so I have space to learn the ropes in private. That won't happen as in laws are flying in two days b4 and staying with us a month.


    Thx.
    milk the in-laws visit for all its worth.

    Get the in-laws to cook/clean/wash up/entertain your toddler/laundry.

    My MIL came and stayed for a week when DH went back to work. I plonked myself on the couch each morning at 6.30am in just a singlet/shorts and put DD on my chest with a boob out. she fed on/off whilst I watched TV. I only took her off to shower or to pee. If I wanted a nap I'd give her to MIL after the housework was done.

    In your case as FIL is around too, you might want to set up your bedroom as a feed zone. Get lots of DVDs, laptop, books +/- TV and park yourself there with your bub. Confirm with your hubby how he is to show his parents that the rest of the house is their job.

    DO NOT cook/clean up for anybody. if you have to order in each day takeaway then do it. Maybe pre-cook/freeze some foods you know your DD loves so that even if you adults are eating lots of takeaway or having late meals your DD gets fed. Get hubby to pick up groceries on way home from work. Is your toddler at daycare? if so then make sure MIL/FIL are allowed to pick up/drop off - write down your DD's routine and stick it up on the fridge/pantry/toilet door. Get them into your DD's routine as in playgroup/library etc. Most grandparents love spending alone time with the grandkids. yes your DD might pick up some habits that isnt to your liking but deal with it later.

    I'm due with #2 in 4 weeks and my MIL is flying up to spend 2 weeks with me post birth. I've starting cooking/freezing small amounts of food for DD as well as larger containers for us. I've stocked the pantry with all of DD's favs, bought the toy doll that the new baby will give her. MIL was up last week and was shown how to sign in/out at daycare, where playgroup is, library etc . My DD also was totally looked after MIL for a couple of days so they are both comfy with each other.

    Good luck and you are allowed to lay down the rules.

    ps. make sure you eat heaps and drink much more water... BF takes a lot of nutrients/water and dont worry bout losing baby weight till after 3mths.

  2. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Rose&Aurelia&Hannah For This Useful Post:

    hopefully2  (20-05-2012),SugarSkull  (20-05-2012)

  3. #12
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    sorry also meant to say that have visiting days - ie sat afternoon 3-5 and sun 10-12 in a local park or something that people can come and see the new bub but not destroy your house. Get a couple of woolies platters and some juice bottles and that way you can just leave when you get tired.

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    hopefully2  (20-05-2012)

  5. #13
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    Try and encourage people to keep their visits short - about 15 mins is optimum.

    Feed bubs before people arrive, that way you've maximised your chances of bubs not wanting a feed whilst people are there.

    Just excuse yourself and go into the bedroom if you need or want to feed in privacy.

    My DD fed around the clock. I sat on the couch and used a pillow under DD. I curled the pillow up so that my entire chest area was hidden. I also got bubs to attach as people were arriving (ie not in the house) as that's the exposed time.

    DD was born a week before xmas which we were having at our house. For the 2 or 3 hours that people were here I gave her some formula as she was a fussy baby and I couldn't deal with her fuss as well as everyone in the house.

    I was absolutely blood minded about bf'ing DD and perserved through every bf issue I have ever come across with the exception of mastitis. I had cracked, bleeding nipples, thrush, infections, vasospams, a recurring bleb, attachment pain akin to 2nd stage labour, perma feeding baby and serious supply issues most likely caused by a severe PPH.

    HTH

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    hopefully2  (20-05-2012)

  7. #14
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    This has probably all been said before but:

    *skin to skin at birth and in the days thereafter

    *no bottles or dummies

    *eat well and drink lots of water

    *insist on privacy if you want it - ask others to give you some time or excuse yourself to another room (this is what I did).

    *relax and go with the flow - feed as often as baby is asking. Watch bub not clock. Prepare to be up at night a lot but that's the way of it.

    *in those first couple of weeks (after about day 3 or so) you get this terrible, horrible sting and burn in your nipples at feed time. (at least, I did with both mine) It can bring you to tears every feed BUT IT PASSES. It will definately pass especially if you are gentle with your nipples and keep bubby's fingernails away from them. Just push through this and like magic after a couple of weeks or so feeding stops hurting and is as nice as those first couple of days again.

    & get your a r s e to a class! I did before bub number 1 and it was such a tremendous help and really gives you the best chance for success.

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    hopefully2  (20-05-2012)

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    My LC saved me and ultimately was the one who kept me breast feeding (I was so close to not continuing). I was only 22 and felt that every midwife has their own opinions as to what is "right" and "wrong". I was so busy trying not to do the "wrong thing" that it totally stressed me out and bub and I suffered. On day 4 i had nipple shields to help heal my cracked and sore nipples and by day 6 we were fine and back feeding without the shields.

    I also asked friends to wait untill we were home to visit as in hospital my boobs always seemed to be out. If family wanted to come to hospital that was fine I just was sure to let them know that I fed bub whenever she wanted. That way they knew I would feed whenever and could leave if they felt uncomfortable.

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    hopefully2  (20-05-2012)

  11. #16
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    I wish someone had told me that it's ok to have to resort to using a shield instead of making me feel useless and telling me 'you'll only confuse baby and she'll never latch on properly. DD is 8wo and althougjt I have I start the feed with the shield it comes off after a minute and she latches on perfectly!

    I wish someone had told me not just to feed her every 3 hours and that sometimes she will want more or less.. Instead in he first week or so I just listened to her cry between feeds coz the poor kid was hungry but I didn't know.

    Always have a thin wrap with you to cover up (if you're a little self concious like I am).

    Don't let other bf'ing mums judge you re:shield etc if you know you are doing what's right for you and bub.

    Some things that work for some people don't work for others do don't compare yourself to them

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    bumMum  (20-05-2012),hopefully2  (20-05-2012)

  13. #17
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    Set up a "spot" with a comfy pillow, drink, snacks, remote etc and expect to park your butt there for a while!

    As much as this killed me, ignore the housework (or get your in laws to help out!) and just spend time with your kids.

    Have realistic expectations, baby will feed a lot and for a long time at first, but this will even out.

    Your nipples probably will hurt at first while they get used to feeding, have some Lansinoh or the like at the ready.

    For the first six or so weeks your boobs are the answer to all your baby's problems (well, what I'm trying to say is just stick a boob in!)

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  15. #18
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