SOS - Did it work for you?

**WhiteTulips** · 17-05-2012 16:21

Thank you all so much for your advice, it's all taken on board

**Doc** · 17-05-2012 16:41

Yep we did it, sort of.
DD already followed a pretty good routine and after reading the book i realised her routine was pretty much what the book suggested anyway.

I used to rock her to sleep and the book gave me the confidence to change our hour+ long bedtime saga of getting her to sleep. I didn't like the idea of CC, I thought it would be hard for her to understand why i wasn't coming to comfort her. To start with we took a more gentle approach.

At about 8 months she was put in her cot and we would pat her bum until she fell asleep. After a few nights of this we stopped patting and just sat next to her cot until she went to sleep. After a few weeks of this we sat in her doorway until she went to sleep. We then took the big step of putting her to bed and leaving the room. She new it was sleeping time, this was no huge shock for her. We made lots of noise so she knew we weren't far away. She called out on the first night for about 8 mins, second night was 4 mins, third night was under 2. On the fourth night she went straight to sleep. When I say 'called out' I mean she wasn't screaming, just yelling for our attention. She was clean, fed, warm and had her night time cuddle and by that age i believe she understood what was going on.

It made our lives a lot easier and not just at bed time but also becuase she had learnt to 'self-settle' (the book is HUGE on this word) when she stirred during the night she didn't need my help to get back to sleep. Obviously she still cried if she was cold or hungry or during times of teething or illness and I always knew that when she did wake it was because she needed somthing.

Do want you feel comfortable with and remember not every bub will fit into the books mould. Goodluck.

**knomie** · 17-05-2012 17:40

I did and it worked for me. Dd was two months old and now she still continues it with some tweaking.
Took about two weeks for it to be done but she responded after a few days. I dont follow it by the book but pretty similar.
Mind you we never let her cio and we also give her a dummy. Babies are babies and they love their dummys!!

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**Witwicky** · 17-05-2012 17:55

I have never done it and never will.
It 'works' because, as Thermo mentioned, the infant realises that their caregiver is not responding to their communication and therefore gives up (look up "learned helplessness"). There are psychological and developmental repercussions associated with ignoring your baby's cries.

This is a policy statement on controlled crying issued by the Australian Association of Infant Mental Health (AAIMHI):

'Controlled crying is not consistent with what infants need for their optimal emotional and psychological health, and may have unintended negative consequences'.

**babycart** · 17-05-2012 17:56

I used SOS for DD1 and yes, it did work, but it did take a long time and a lot of protesting and even crying.

I'm following the routines for DD2. The settling process though is a complete catastrophe. (last night she screamed for three hours unless being cuddled for no apparent reason [not hunger/pain related ]).

In part way through reading the No Cry Sleep Solution, but so far, nothing in it is new to me.

**Rose&Aurelia** · 17-05-2012 18:28

Originally Posted by WhiteTulips

She was a wonderful sleeper from 3 weeks to 6mths, but hasn't been the same since.

my DD too was wonderful 5w -6mths and then absolute hell till 12/13mths. Its not you- its bubs. They go through these huge emotional/mental growth spurts as well as separation anxiety. My advice is to ride it out. I have seen some people use TH's methods successively and with little effort when babies are about 1yo or older. I have seen TH's methond that used on babies has made them rather shut down toddlers.

yes - if you find her solids routine helpful then go for it. Her solids feeding makes sense somewhat and I know people who use the times but not the method of settling. I just dont like her settling methods. Leaving children to cry IMO is cruel regardless of length or severity of cry. as i said IMO... I dont leave adults to cry and I'm not leaving my child to either.

**Ellymoe** · 17-05-2012 20:02

If (when) I have problems with my own spawn's sleep, I'm going to try these first:

http://www.parentingscience.com/infa...-training.html

I like that they are backed up by some studies, and would also be less distressing for parents who are finding it hard to just let a child cry.

**SugarSkull** · 17-05-2012 20:11

It worked for me = ) I didn't follow the book religiously because the routine was a little unrealistic for us. I followed DS's cues when it came to his daytime naps and when he wanted to feed.
I started controlled crying when he was 5 months old. I never let him become hysterical. I let him protest but I started it slowly. I started with only leaving him for 30 seconds then the time got longer. It took a few weeks but it was the best thing I ever did.
In the book it also says not to give bub a dummy.. I don't think that's something to fight if your bub sucks for comfort. DS has a dummy for bed time every night.
Just do what you're comfortable with. Controlled crying is normal within my family and a lot of our bubs are great sleepers.

**WhiteTulips** · 18-05-2012 19:47

Originally Posted by Izzys Mummy

my DD too was wonderful 5w -6mths and then absolute hell till 12/13mths. Its not you- its bubs. They go through these huge emotional/mental growth spurts as well as separation anxiety. My advice is to ride it out. I have seen some people use TH's methods successively and with little effort when babies are about 1yo or older. I have seen TH's methond that used on babies has made them rather shut down toddlers.

yes - if you find her solids routine helpful then go for it. Her solids feeding makes sense somewhat and I know people who use the times but not the method of settling. I just dont like her settling methods. Leaving children to cry IMO is cruel regardless of length or severity of cry. as i said IMO... I dont leave adults to cry and I'm not leaving my child to either.

All of this is actually super helpful...I pre 6 months I was a tough b!tch with her (loving, but strict) but now it literally breaks my heart to hear her cry...I tried a little bit of SOS tonight with the leaving to cry for 20 mins and I just couldn't do it. Hopefully, she'll grow out of it sooner rather than later

Thanks Izzysmum

**Boobycino** · 18-05-2012 20:00

Yeah I read it and didn't even know where to start to try to implement it with my baby.

I think there's not enough "trouble shooting" in the book. It's like - it might work for the right baby, but the "wrong" baby that book is going to be horrible for all involved. (read - approximately - page 187. The section on leaving babies to poo and vomit because they do this on command to manipulate you

)

"no cry sleep solution" is a good book. It's a lot more tailorable to your baby. You actually put together your own sleep plan from the suggestions and information. Rather than "THIS is what your baby should be doing at X age"