Ill try to keep this short lol.
My partner has an 11 yr old daughter from a previous relationship. The bio mum fled the state and denied him access etc when his daughter was only 3. Only recently we have learned that bio mum has two other children and she is living in QLD. All three kids are in foster care (with great carers thank god and are all together) and my partner has been in contact with his daughter again which is fantastic she seems like a lovely girl despite being so neglected. (bio mum is in and out of rehab) Anyway my partner has phone calls with her once a week and it is going really well and he is going up on his own to see her later this year.
I want to know how to introduce myself in the future without putting any pressure on her. You know the whole evil, jealous stepmother thing-which i'm not! I have written her a letter (which i haven't sent yet) which explains a few things and to let her know i am here if she ever wants to get to know me. I would really appreciate if you could take the time to read this and tell me what you think.
I wanted to write this letter to let you know how happy your dad is to be apart of your life again. He is smart, funny and he loves you dearly. I can see the joy in his face and the pride in his voice when he talks about you. I also thought it could be an opportunity to introduce myself. My name is xxxxx and your dad and i have been together for eight years and we have three beautiful children. He told me he had a young daughter from the beginning and i was very excited to meet you. Unfortunately we didn't know where you were until last year and we learnt that you lived with your nan and pop in Qld.
When i was younger my mum wasn''t always able to look after me either even though she wanted to so my father raised me. It sounds as though your mum has been having a bit of a hard time as well. I'm not here to judge her or say nasty comments that would be unfair. As long as you and your siblings are together and safe that is what is most important.
My dad and i have a great relationship and i don't think i would be the person i am today without his influence. I would love for you to experience that too and will encourage any connection that you can have with your dad. I know i can never replace your mum- i wouldn't even try. I would like to think i can be your friend and if you want to share things with me then you can. If you don't that's ok too.
A bit about myself. I was born in Geelong. I grew up on a farm in NSW near the snow. I love animals especially horses and dogs and i like to host parties and cook for people.
Please remember that you and your siblings are always welcome in our home and you are considered to be part of our family. Take care of yourself and one day if you feel ready and would like to get to know me i would love that.
Honest opinions pls!